Would you take the name of your wife?

@ronnyb (6113)
Jamaica
March 6, 2010 12:17am CST
We all know of the traditional order in which a man marries a woman and she takes his last name but I remember a Miss world I think who says that she wished to defy that order by having her husband take her last name . Now what do you think and I am asking this from the perspective of both sexes .Would you as a woman want a man to take your last name ?.And men would you be comfortable taking on the last name of your woman.Another thing is does the taking on a woman's name by a man emasculates a man in some way?.Also how would you feel if your son came to you and admitted that he wanted to adopt his wifes name ,what would you advice him to do . Your views are keenly anticipated .
3 people like this
9 responses
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 Mar 10
Although I was quite glad to relinquish my maiden name for personal reasons when I got married I don’t see anything wrong with a husband taking his wife’s name if he so desires. I believe that people should do whatever pleases them unless it is going to hurt someone so I do not see the problem in breaking tradition if that is what is desired. It is not a big deal in my view. I would not have a problem if my son wanted to do that, as I said no biggie to me, I don't know how my husband would feel though because it would be his surname that would be relinquished; I think it would feel a bit strange to him.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
There are some countries where they allow the couple to choose what surname to give the child, that of the father's or of the mother's. However, there is none at all where it is allowed for the man to take the wife's last name. Maybe, a law has yet to be passed for this to be recognized by the populace as an acceptable matter. For my part, though, i find this to be odd. If a wife is supposed to succumb to the husband as the head of the family, then, there is no way that this can be taken as a household issue at all. Always, it will be the woman who take after the husband's surname. In some countries, they have allowed the wives to retain their surname even after having been legally married. Most wives though do not take advantage of this privelege.
1 person likes this
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
6 Mar 10
It's pretty much been the norm since I can remember the woman takes the man's last name. On the other hand, I see nothing wrong with the man taking the woman's last name. I also know plenty of ladies who kept their maiden name but placed a hypen between her maiden name and her new husband's last name. These are primarily professional women who still want recognition using their maiden name but want others to also know they are married. I was honored to take my husband's last name. My maiden name was long and always mispronounced.
@ronnyb (6113)
• Jamaica
8 Mar 10
Thank you Carolbee,you insight is invaluable as usual
• United States
17 Mar 10
When my brother got married, he also took his wife's last name. I think this is a good thing because we are from a small town and everyone knew who we were. I hate to say this, but our parents ran our name into the dirt, and that is why he took her last name. I am glad that there are the options. I think this is a good idea.
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
As of this time, most of the answers you would earn will be a no-no. As for me, it will be a no, too. My reason for this is rooted in the bible. When a woman marries a man, the woman subjects herself to be the wife, the wind beneath the husband's wings. Now, if a woman boosts a man's ego, there's no way at all that the man adopts the woman's last name. It is contraty to being the wind beneath the wings.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
6 Mar 10
I think it is nice when they use both names. I wouldn't have wanted my sons to give up there names & take their wives names. If u use both names then everybody should be happy.
@ronnyb (6113)
• Jamaica
8 Mar 10
Well I dont mind a woman using both names ,that is nice too.Thank you Antique for your response
@bestboy19 (5478)
• United States
8 Mar 10
I have heard of that being done in wealthy families. They might not have a male heir and will ask their daughters fiance to take their name so it can continue. I don't think I'd do it, though. I'm just as proud of my name as they are of theirs.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
8 Mar 10
I can only think of one situation in which I would want my husband to take my last name. That would be if I had been a doctor before we were married because once you are a doctor you aren't allowed to change your name and I'd want our family to be united in every way so that would be the only way that we'd be able to be united. However, that wasn't the case and I never actually made it to medical school so I took my husband's last name and I'm proud of it because his last name is his mother's maiden name.
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
6 Mar 10
Not personally, but I have some experience of this sort. A guy at work who was originally from Russia had a very russian family name. It was a bit difficult to spell too. Well, he married an officemate who had a very caucasian last name. A few weeks back, I realized that the guy has taken the name of his wife. Now he has a generic last name, yet he still speaks with a heavy russian accent.
@binagupta (627)
• India
6 Mar 10
my dear friend now its a modern world, so sure they call each other with their names
• United States
6 Mar 10
My wife and I both took each other's names when we married. I don't feel emasculated, and have nothing but contempt and pity for any man whose masculinity is so insecure that they would find it lessened by taking the name of someone they loved enough to marry.