I hate a friend when he/she refuses to help me.

Philippines
May 12, 2010 7:00am CST
I don't know why i should feel this way but it's true. I hate a friend when he or she refuses to help me eventhough she can do something but just not willing to do. Actually, this problem involves money but i have never borrowed money from her before. But now, i'm on a crisis. I need help. And I always pay my debts. Despite of all the reasons that i said to her she still refuse to lend me some money though she's not having any financial problems. I don't understand. I ignored my pride just to solve the problem that i am facing now. But why? I have a job. For sure, i can pay her back. I really don't understand why. In the end, i ended up crying not because of the money but because a friend never help me when i am truly in need. I got hurt.
1 person likes this
6 responses
• Philippines
12 May 10
is she really a friend? i don't think so. if she really is, she'll let you borrow what you asked for, even if you didn't ask for help, a true friend will always be there to help you. you also mentioned that she's capable of lending you money since she's not having financial problems, i see no reason not to lend you some.
• Philippines
13 May 10
I don't know why.. we've been friends for many years. In fact, the amount is just too little.. not that really much.. i am sure i can pay her back right away it's just that i'm short of money and i need it by tomorrow. But we're still friends it's just that i don't expect any help from her when i'm in need. I don't like borrowing money actually but i was in need at that time.
• Philippines
13 May 10
yeah me too i don't like borrowing money, i feel like it's one of the hardest things to do here on earth or anywhere else. i am usually the one who lends money, i am not rich but i can lend some. but i don't lend money to those not-so-close-friends of mine especially if it's not so important. someone said that "if you want to keep your friend don't lend him/her money,lend money if you want to lose both", i kinda agree with this but the thing is, i think it's case to case basis. and in your case, she should have lent you some, since you badly needed it. the word is consideration.
@amelly (1554)
• Malaysia
13 May 10
me too..in your problem it's financially right.i mean she should help,of course she is kind of hesitate because it involve money,not like giving advice or lending her ears to you but friend in need is a friend indeed.you must be having a hard time right now..she should help u though..maybe one day when she got the same problem as you.then she'll realised but it's really not appropriate to just ignore you...
@SViswan (12051)
• India
13 May 10
I would be hurt too...if I had swallowed my pride and asked for help...any kind..not just financial. But to be fair, she probably had her own reasons for not lending money. She was probably cheated by a friend earlier...or she is saving the money for something else which she can't tell you. It could be anything really. But I know I can't tell you not to be hurt by this.....but I can tell you it will pass.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
13 May 10
Hi tess, I don't know your friend or the reason why she won't lend you the money. Was it a lot of money? Does your friend have a lot of money to spare. I mean if something were to happen and you could not pay back the money, would that compromise her budget?
@goldeneagle (6745)
• United States
12 May 10
Actually she is smart. I am not saying that you wouldn't repay her, but I have done things to help a couple of friends in the past, and my deeds have come back to haunt me both times. One even ripped me out of $1,400 and skipped town, leaving a bad mark on my credit history in the process, so I am really skeptical about helping people now, ESPECIALLY when there is money involved.
@annierose (18974)
• Philippines
12 May 10
I cannot find reasons for her not to help you since you stated that she doesn't have any financial problems. This also sometimes happened with me. Some of my friends borrowed money from me. If I can lend them a money,I do it to help them but if I cannot, I explained the reasons why.There are times that I do not lend money to someone but usually they are not a close friend of mine. It is because I know they really do forget easily once they have a debt to a person. I am not rich so I just choose the people whom I will give a help to because money is very difficult to earn yet very easy to spend. I do not want to judge your friend but I am afraid to say she is not a true friend of yours.Let's take an example that something bad will happen if you do not get the required amount of money, and then she still won't help, that is very terrible. A true friend would even risk his or her life for his friend but with your case, it seems that she really doesn't care at all. Do not be upset. Still be thankful that you learned what kind of friend she is.You can find other friends which will be true to you.