It finally happened.
By 2004cqui
@2004cqui (2812)
United States
August 5, 2010 3:29pm CST
My 20 and 25 year old sons became slugs. They cannot pay the measly amount we ask every month and refuse to lift a finger in our home. "I don't have time." Ya, but they can go on trips and to the amusement park?
I threw them out. The oldest is now spreading lies and threatening legal action. But my husband,22 year autistic and I do not have to be their housekeepers and lawn service. The 22 year old appreciates where he lives. Go figure.
10 responses
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
6 Aug 10
Good act. You need to teach them how to appreciate parents who had nurtured them for this long. I wish I could do the same with my brother. Whenever he needed some money, I always was there for him, even when I knew sometimes he did not return my money. I thought he is my brother, where could he turn to if not to me. Just a couple of days ago, I need some money rgently and that I will return to him in two months (not much and I know he has it), but he told me he did not have any money. Lo, today I learned he bought a new motorbike (he already has three). So, I wish I could throw him out somewhere alas he has his own house.
1 person likes this
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
6 Aug 10
Yes, I am so angry with my brother, I told myself I will not lend him anymore money.
I think parents will worry if their children still live with them when they're done being raised (as you put it). My mother worried whenever I quit a job and tried to get a new one. So, I think parents will be happy and content when the children are out of the house and make their own life.
1 person likes this
@2004cqui (2812)
• United States
6 Aug 10
Ouch. I guess now you have to practice the word "No". I heard the word "no" gets easier as you use it. Also, telling anyone you will have to check out if you can do it or not buys you time to build up the strength. Lots of this is coming out of the woodwork. I was reading the news the other day that said more and more kids are living with their parents later in life. They said it was because "This is the first generation that like their parents". I didn't believe that the minute they said it. I wonder how many parents love having their children still living with them after they're done being raised!
1 person likes this
@BStuff (495)
• United States
6 Aug 10
Look the best thing you can do for your kids is kick them out if they are living too easy in your home. My dad is terrible with this with my brother he lets him, his wife and child stay in their home and make messes, waste money, and all that.
I live with my parents now though I'm 23 but I pay rent and I'm a full time student. I just live here during the summers to save money for the school year. I'm not a lazy rude bum. I help my parents out.
Your sons will be upset at first but then once they better themselves I think they will get the bigger picture and get over it. 
1 person likes this
@2004cqui (2812)
• United States
8 Aug 10
See! That's what I mean! My youngest hasn't finished high school. I told them as long as they are going to high school they can live here. A neighbor woman figured she could make a few bucks off his pay check he gets from a part time job at a local grocery store and "rent" a room to him. That's all it took to get him to fall off that horse. But both are rude. And since when is it OK to bring your girl friend in too!
@jamborieman (563)
• Philippines
5 Aug 10
Damn, that is hard. I'm just a kid but when I'm in my 20's I'll be eager to earn money and help out my parents and all who helped to raise me.
1 person likes this
@jujunme (2501)
• United States
6 Aug 10
"Threatening legal action"? What does he think will come of that? you had every right to put them out of your home, afterall both of them are old enough to take care of themselves and live on their own.I guess since you're thier mom, they expected to go on living with you for nothing.Your oldest son who is threatening you and spreading lies has a lot of growing up to do. He lacks any respect and appreciation for all you have done for him and shoulkd be ashamed of himself. You shouldbn't feel one ounce of guilt for putting them out, but, i'm glad to hear the younger one seems to be doing just fine.
1 person likes this
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
5 Aug 10
One thing is for sure, if they are no longer helping and they are still being a burden then they should have a life of their own now. Let them feel how to deal with life on their own so they would know how to stand by themselves. With that, they would be able to think in a right manner so that will make each them a better person.
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
5 Aug 10
Hello there! It is in the manner of telling your sons whatever you want to tell them. Tell them that they should know how to live independently, you are not forgetting that they are your sons but they should figure out to solve their own problems from now on. Tell them you are not going to be there for them all the time to save them. You will eventually be in the old age and by that time if they don't know how to live by themselves then they will have bigger problems than what they are encountering now. a mother will always be a mother to her kids.
@ashantiadj (41)
• United States
6 Aug 10
I do not have a clue what sort of legal action they could take. I hate to hear that they act this way, but perhaps being kicked out is what they need. With no one to support them, they will be forced to support themselves and become more responsible and independent. I simply hope that they realize that you are doing this for their own good.
1 person likes this
@2004cqui (2812)
• United States
6 Aug 10
Wow! I am so glad I brought this up in here! I was just hoping to find support! I got it in spades! Thanks to the people in here I was and am able to run the right "movie reels" in my brain. The minute I second guess myself I remember to pull out the ones that were the mean, evil things they have said to me. Rather than live here cheaply by being a team they became useless, undependable and hard to talk to. I shouldn't have to fear my own children! I dare one of their friends parents to confront me about my decision. I will have only one thing to say to them. I don't have to live in fear of my own children in my own house! THAT will knock them back on their heels! Wish me luck when my hubby is out of town all next week!
1 person likes this
@maezee (41997)
• United States
5 Aug 10
It must be hard as a parent to kick your kids out, but it doesn't mean you love them any less - it merely means that they need to learn to grow up, live on their own, pay their own bills. A lot of my parents' friends are in this position with their kids, and I would imagine that it's a pretty hard place to be in. But, if they don't grow up sometime, who knows? They could be 40 and still living in the house, not contributing at all.
@nickgradio (42)
• Canada
6 Aug 10
Wow, Good For you for throwing out those spoiled Brats out the door, Maybe They should keep in mind that ITS YOUR HOME!
@parrot2010 (813)
•
5 Aug 10
Wow I feel sorry that you as a parent have to go through this with your kids. They sound like my brother who is 15 today. He never does his school work, doesn't help out around the house and does nothing else apart from play video games on his playstation and eat like a dog that hasn't eaten for a week. He doesn't want to do a bit of part time work to make himself some money for himself for him to do whatever he wants to do with it instead of asking my parents for money all the time. We have encouraged him to get help but he doesn't want to and my parents don't know what to do with him. I don't really have any advice on this but just to say you're not alone.
