Do you openly add friends here at MyLot? Or do you wait for them to add you?
By anncherry
@anncherry (406)
Philippines
August 11, 2010 9:32pm CST
I am quite new here (well, based on my credits, it's obvious ^^), and I'm just wondering if people here are more open in making and accepting friends. I mean, in Facebook, I carefully screen my friend requests (I make sure that I really know them), since I have pictures and information there that I don't really want to share with every single one that passes by. Well, for me, there is some amount of privacy that one should maintain, especially in a social network like Facebook, don't you think? :)
However, here in MyLot, I deem that the environment is very different and more welcoming. We exchange views without hesitation even if we haven't obviously met each other in person. We can easily vent out our frustrations with a single discussion starter and voila! people are very fast in helping and comforting! :)) In fact, I find it easier to tell you guys about my emotions at a certain moment. It's a wonderful relationship, and I am so glad to have come here. But I'm also wondering if people will raise their brows if they receive a friend request from some unknown person (me, for example). I've been thinking about sending friend requests to people I like (based on their comments). Maybe I'm just too afraid of getting rejected, or being thought of as a fool. Some may say, "Hey, don't get too carried away!" or something similar to that (there are different kinds of people after all, and I respect that).
So, what I want to know is, will you welcome a friend invite from someone you don't know (like me) with a smile? :)
3 people like this
18 responses
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
I am glad to add them up if i feel like adding them. There is no issue about it. If someone wants to do the same and they wanted to add me then i just accept them without hesitating. what is the sense of being super friendly that is stated on my profile in the social networks that I have if I will not show how to be friendly with them and that is the first step in being friendly, adding them and accepting them without any hesitations.
1 person likes this
@figurativeme (1089)
• Philippines
13 Aug 10
Hi! I am also new in mylot and your question is also my question and I felt what you felt, too. I am learning from the responses you get. I guess that is what a community is for...learning from each other.
@anncherry (406)
• Philippines
14 Aug 10
So glad that my discussion can help you. I'm having fun just by reading their comments, too. :))
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
12 Aug 10
I add anyone and everyone who wants to be on my list of friends. Doesn't matter how old, young or where they live. I don't look at the member's profile prior to my adding them to my list. I added two people recently who obviously used myLot as a place to promote their sites. I don't agree with using myLot in this manner. I didn't report them and won't because they will eventually hang themselves. I look at myLot as a place to make friends, be involved with discussions, have fun and finally earn a little bit for my involvement.
@greygoo (795)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
hi~
there are some who make 'friends' so they can send private messages about their forums and stuff outside mylot, and that could be irritating.
i add people whenever i find their comments interesting (just like you^_^).
i have had experiences where they don't accept the friend invite, and in that case, i simply revoke it.
when people add me, i try to visit their profile and check their recent activities to see if we've responded to the same discussion. but i generally accept all:)
i don't think you're one of those who merely want to abuse the 'send a private message' option, so go ahead and add people~ and maybe you can make comments like 'i totally agree with you' or respond to their discussions, of course, so they get to see you before you actually add them.^_^
glad you're enjoying here at mylot. hope to meet you in some of the discussions;)
@bluemoonpavilion (4658)
• Singapore
12 Aug 10
greygoo,
It's nice of you to check out people's profile and activities. I do that sometimes to be updated on any changes in my friends.
@masmelgar (98)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
I am also a bit apprehensive in accepting friends but, what the hey. We have a certain degree of anonymity here. Even though I use my real email address, I think it's a step to have real open friends. Although I don't think about it the other way around. Maybe you're right. We may not get that kind of attitude towards others and I am also afraid of being rejected. But we'll never know until we try, do we?
@miweikang1987 (134)
• China
13 Aug 10
You don't need to worry about this. So many people here are not familier with each other at the first time.Then they know each other gradually. As far as I see,you can choose the person who have the same interests with you.That was easy to be accepted. Even if you are rejected, you don't need to be afraid. It's no big deal. People around here is good, I think. Anyway,if you want, just do it.
@gunagohan (3414)
• India
12 Aug 10
I screen friends in social networking sites, i will never add a person as my friend whom i doesn't have any info about..
but here in mylot, i add who ever gives me a request...I have not rejected anybody till now in mylot who have sent their request to be my friend..
I have stopped sending friend requests to others since many days, because in the beginning when i joined i have sent more requests and most of them have accepted me and i have a healthy friend list , but i accept who is sending me a request!!
No screening in mylot!!
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
12 Aug 10
We can never have enough friends. I am always willing to invite new friends here. I don't wait for someone to add me first.
@kharlav (1669)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
I add friends here in mylot. I just dont wait for them to add me. So that I would have friends faster. But it just depends on their interests. If they have the same interest as me then I add them. SO that the discussions they would make or respond I can comment and respond also.
@bluemoonpavilion (4658)
• Singapore
12 Aug 10
I have done both.
I always accept a friend request as long as they have at least done 1 activity here. The experience here is totally different from facebook. I think we are not so traceable here so it's ok to accept friend request.
As for requesting for friends, sometimes I find some starters of interesting topics and also making good comments, I would feel very inclined to make friends with them, so I would try to add them.
@for3verfamous (2190)
• Canada
12 Aug 10
Well since nobody (or few of us) know eachother in real life, if we only accepted people as friends who we knew.. Well none of us would have friends on mylot!
I'm open to adding anyone on mylot. In most cases I've waited for people to add me, but when I see people who I can really relate to and have very similar interests to I add them. 
It's also very positive and welcoming here like you said, so I don't think anyone would deny your friend request.
It's also very positive and welcoming here like you said, so I don't think anyone would deny your friend request.
@lindaharding627 (1442)
• United States
12 Aug 10
I usually wait for others to add me as a friend or say that they would be my friend then I add them. There is only one time that I will turn a friend down here on mylot and that is when the person has been a member here for a day or more and has zero posts. To me that indicates there is a likelihood if I add that person I will be spammed so I don't add people who have been here a day or more with no posts. And yes if you ask me, I will accept your friendship here on mylot.
@owlwings (43915)
• Cambridge, England
12 Aug 10
I have nearly 500 people on my friend list and I am looking to reduce that because, personally, I find that too many. From time to time I export my list to a spreadsheet and I see that I currently have 360 friends who have not been active in MyLot for 6 months. Most of these are people who asked me to add them.
Since I was rather alarmed at the number of friends I had, I have for some time consciously not been adding people and only accepting invitations from people who have been here a while.
When I receive a friend request, I always look at the profile to see if we have interests in common and whether I like the way that they write. Sometimes I get friend requests from people with a user rating of 1 or even 0. If they haven't even participated in a discussion in which I was involved, I wonder what reason they have for wanting to add me. Unfortunately, all too often it is merely because they want to use Private Messaging to spam people with their referral links. If anyone does that to me, they very quickly get removed from my list!
I think that, as you say, MyLot is rather different from Facebook. There is less personal information available here and that is a conscious policy of MyLot. I have one or two friends whom I have corresponded with outside of MyLot but mostly I know people only from their participation in discussions.
@allamgirl (2140)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
i accept whoever adds me here. i take it as a sort of compliment when people add me. it feels like they appreciate my comments. just add whoever you want, you're right, this is different from facebook. it doesn't feel like everyone can see the littlest detail that you post. it'ss just sharing opinions. and if people don't accept your requests, then just don't take it personally. hope you have fun here in mylot!
@magtibaygom (4858)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
When I was just new here, I added my initial friends. But now, I already have so many of them here. Those who want to add me as friend, I just wait for them to add me, and because of my experience these past few days of receiving spam from newly approved friends, friends who have zero post, I am now careful in approving friend requests. My criteria now is, they must first participate in my discussions and the discussions I am participating here before I approve their requests. Let's not forget that in "friend requests", there is the word "friend". The question is, are you really my friend? Do you really want to be my friend? Or, are you just interested in spamming me?
@ReViewMeMedia (3785)
• United States
12 Aug 10
I just wait and let them add me because I don't feel like asking them to be my friend. It just isn't really my thing. I don't even ask people to add me onto their facebook pages. I guess I'm just not that interested in social networking.
