In the middle

Good morning - YES, I was very recently involved in the VERY same THING! One set of neighbors, who were here first, and we are very friendly with; Second set of neighbors, who moved in a few years ago and I became very close to her, our sons used to play together.... new neighbor is loud, somewhat aggresive in expressing herself, very opinionated, dramatic and immature. Old neighbor is quiet, mature, set in ways and could care less about new neighbors drama. They had a snit and new neighbor wanted nothing to do with old neighbor. EQUALS I was caught between them! Anyway, I just handled with my honest feelings: "Old neighbor has never treated me badly, I'm sorry you feel they treated you badly" "We're neighbors, we don't all have to be best friends, but should still be respectful and cordial to each other" "Don't hold grudges; just let it go, mind your own, and try to be happy" "It's none of my business; your issue with X is your issue to either let go or not" Other advise: Don't gossip or share information with one about the other. Let them both know: "I understand your not wanting to be involved with the other, but I want to remain involved with you both." And don't be afraid to pretend nothing happened. If you want to have a BBQ, don't feel that you have to exclude either/both of them because of THEIR issues. Tell them both: "X will be here and I hope you can leave YOUR issues at home and not drag it into my home" Don't change who you are, how you act, how nice you are for EITHER one of them. Wave, say "HI", to both of them, regardless of which one you're with at the time. Best of luck!

It has been a very long time since I have been in the middle of anything of this sorts as my friends have chosen to make feel unworthy of friendship. However, when I have been told of such fights, I truly respond that if you value the friendship you would try to work this out yourself as I am not about to take sides as I value both as friends. When one comes and talks bad about the other truly you have to say that you value her just as much as the other and you are not going to betray either. Same for the other feuding friend. If they value your friendship they must understand that it is not your battle but theirs.

If you find it hard to stay neutral, perhaps you should get them together and make them understand your position. This may also help to get them to resolve their problem. Just remember not to get involved with their fight and be objective.

I was caught between two sisters who are long time friends of mine. The older one always complain about the sister who never help with household chores. The younger always told me that she did most of the chores and still the elder gets mad at her. So, I told the older to start talking to the younger about the situation. I told the younger to talk to her sister about the chores. So, I told them the same things.

Sometimes I think that the best that you can do is to remain friends with both. Side with neither, and allow to sort their own differences.

Yes,it's very unpleasant,and you feel like you betrayed them both,but actually,you haven't done anything bad.And they talk to you so with a high hand,because you hang out with the other person.That's pretty messed up :)

I was in the middle of two former friends in high school. And now I'm in the middle of my MIL & my SIL. They both complain about each other's behavior and expectations... how SIL is a failure, MIL is a holly roller & what MIL thinks of her. I agree with both sides. I just try not to repeat what was said unless it was just FYI stuff not complaints about the other.

I was caught in the middle of a divorce once... not my own divorce obviously. My son's godparents divorced when he was about a year old. I wanted to keep them both in our lives.. they were both his Godparents afterall.. but the guy moved to a different town while the wife kept their home. Basically the guy made the choice not to be involved with me or my son anymore. I did everything I could, I called him and sent him notes trying to tell him I could handle being in the middle and just wanted him in my son's life since at the time I was single and my son had no male role models. It didn't work, he and I quickly lost touch.. but the Godmother stayed in our lives until shortly after the twins were born and she and I had a huge blow out (that's another story). Now I have the Godfather on my Facebook friends list, but haven't spoken to the Godmother in a few years.. I sent her a Christmas card awhile back but we didn't stay in touch after that.

I have been caught in the middle of two friends before. Each friend wanted me to take their side. It is hard to please anyone when everyone wants to be right. You just can'r win in these situations. Being fair to each friend is difficult because one will feel betrayed if you don't choose them over the other. Jealousy can be a bitter enemy to any friendship. All you can do for yourself is to be a good friend to each of your friends and try to help them work out their differences.

I've been through that, my bestfriend and our officemates whom I can say my good friend too, have a silent war but my bestfriend really hate her that time. We saw her at a place and my bestfriend told me that I should not talk to her cause she really don't want to talk to her. She say it with please, she feels awkward seeing her so what we do is we hide where she can't see us. We were looking for her until we went into store and surprisingly the girl was there in front of us but I think she did not notice us. I didn't notice her at all, my friend was the one who notice her. We quietly get out of the store and we can't stop laughing on that incident.

Yes, I've also experienced it...when both of my friends had heated arguments and it's really gonna be hard to be in the middle.

my opinion is able to reslove their differences,but if you really can't go,otherwise,it is also too afraid to save and bckfire