how low would you go if you were desperate?

@dawnald (84146)
Shingle Springs, California
February 25, 2011 2:57pm CST
So a family member's sister was really sick. She was really freaked out about it, and whether she should travel to see her, and how she was going to pay for it if she decided to go. Actually I was rather surprised that she didn't ask me for money for the trip. lol She ended up going (start point Spokane, WA, end point somewhere in Montana), and her sister has recovered. Later I heard that she had hit my dad and step-mom up for some money so that she could go into rehab (drinking problem). So they gave up a cruise they were going to take, and sent the money. A week later she called and said she had dropped out of rehab, but didn't offer to repay any of the money. Possibly not coincidentally this all occurred right around the time of the Montana sister's illness and her trip there. I don't know all the details, as I didn't hear about this until way after the fact, but inquiring minds rather suspect that the money was spent on a trip to Montana to see her sister, who was in very real danger of dying. If this is true, I don't know why she wouldn't have just asked for the money using the true story. But let's just pretend that that's what happened. She lied, gave them a fake story, borrowed money under false pretenses, and used it for something else. I get that she may have been desperately worried about her sister. And I get that she maybe decided that they wouldn't give her the money for that. I'm also pissed that she may have taken money from a couple of Octogenarians for a trip they really wanted to take, and may never have another opportunity to do again. Maybe she stooped that low because she was desperate. How low would you go if you were desperate?
4 people like this
16 responses
@GardenGerty (99444)
• United States
25 Feb 11
I would not stoop that low. But if she does actually need rehab for a drinking problem perhaps her drinking has lowered her personal standards and inhibitions. I need to get an emergency fund built back up, and that is easier said than done.
@GardenGerty (99444)
• United States
25 Feb 11
I kinda dropped that thought mid air. She needs a personal emergency fund for this kind of a situation. should have gone after the word "inhibitions".
2 people like this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Feb 11
Not to bag on smokers here, but honestly if she would quit, she'd actually have a little money for emergencies.
1 person likes this
25 Feb 11
Hi dawn, That sounds like a big fat lie and I don't know why her parents gived up their well needed vacation to hand over the money, this girl must be so selfish and no, I wouldn'ty stoop that low. Tamara
2 people like this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Feb 11
It was her in-laws, but anyway....
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37384)
• United States
25 Feb 11
I don't know...and hopefully I'll never have to find out. I am very industrious and if need be I can usually come up with some way to work it out...and I am not one that asks others for help...I wouldn't however....borrow money under false pretenses....
2 people like this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Feb 11
My sister didn't have the heart to tell my dad and step-mom that it was probably false pretenses....
1 person likes this
@hofferp (4739)
• United States
26 Feb 11
I've borrowed money from my parents, but I always told them the truth about what it was I was going to do with the money AND I always paid it back with lots and lots of interest. But I wouldn't have asked for the money if it meant my parents would have to do without... That's just plain wrong. I'm sorry your parents missed out on their trip!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
They don't pay stuff back with or without interest.
@hofferp (4739)
• United States
1 Mar 11
I personally wouldn't "lend" someone a dime that didn't pay it back. Now, I have been known to "give" my sister, nieces, nephews, etc. money. When I do that, I don't expect repayment.
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
With her, if I give money, I also do it without expecting to be repaid. Because it won't be!!!
@BarBaraPrz (19869)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
25 Feb 11
Well, I wouldn't be entering no limbo contests...
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
Oh please? Limbo lower now...
1 person likes this
@BarBaraPrz (19869)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
1 Mar 11
Would if I still could *sigh*
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
2 Mar 11
me too (ouch)
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
27 Feb 11
nope i would take money that was fro a trip! SHe should pay it back thats for sure so they can go!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
Yeah she should ,but she doesn't have it to pay it back. They are always living paycheck to paycheck.
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
1 Mar 11
Darn it
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (118280)
• Boise, Idaho
26 Feb 11
Things like this are like a two edged sword. I would think that people would be more apt to give over the money if a person were trying to help themselves and go into rehab that to give money for a trip. No matter how serious the illness was. How low would I go if I were desperate? THere was a time that I would have probably stooped to this type of behavior. Now? No. I feel sad for these two Octogenarians. So many situations where people are used and abused like this. They save their money and are frugal just to have something like this happen to them.
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
Yeah I feel badly too. Although if she had been honest they probably would have sent the money anyway!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (118280)
• Boise, Idaho
2 Mar 11
I bet they would have too. It is amazing how often people chose to lie when the truth would really have served them better.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17526)
• Canada
2 Mar 11
There are times when I would think about that. On how low I could go if I become desperate. And I've realized that if ever I come to that point, I wouldn't have any problems going as low as possible. If it came to a point where my family wouldn't have anything to eat, or nowhere to sleep, etc. I think I may even take up a life of crime. I've been pushed a few times, but thankfully not to that point yet.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
2 Mar 11
If my kids weren't eating, I"m not sure how ethical I would be either.
• United States
28 Feb 11
This past year I have been in some desperate situations and to be honest I did not and would not stoop to any low level to get money off anyone especially loved ones. I can't even have the heart to ask for needed let alone lie and make up a story, I just couldn't!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
Some people can, apparently...
@gabs8513 (48716)
• United Kingdom
26 Feb 11
I don't know Dawn I guess it would depend on the Circumstances but I would tell the truth I do not get why this Person lied in the first Place and was it even the truth about her Sister I mean she lied why she needed the Money
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
I have no idea what the truth was. But I do know her sister was sick and that she made the trip.
@katsmeow1213 (29047)
• United States
26 Feb 11
It's all very odd. I mean, obviously everyone has money problems.. but why didn't she ask you for money to go see her sister? I'm sure she realizes the situation you're currently in.. money is not something you can part with when you're soon going to be fending for yourself without spousal support.. however, it never hurts to ask, and if you had a little bit you could have given her, that would be less she'd need to request from someone else. If she just asked each of the people she knew, and they each pitched in $100.. she'd soon have her airfare to go see her sister without taking cruise money away from your parents. It's also really odd that she lied about why she wanted the money. Your parents must be so upset that she didn't use the money for what she said she would. I bet they wouldn't be so upset if she'd told them she wanted the money to go see her sister, and then actually used it for that purpose. I can't see anyone saying no to helping her go see her sister who's so sick she could die.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
I suspect she's pretty much borrowed from everybody, knew dad had the money, didn't want to push her luck with the rest of us, but not sure... I'm not sure the parents know she used the money to see her sister. They just know she didn't do rehab. My sister didn't want to stick her nose in the middle and say anything to them.
@julise (494)
• Indonesia
26 Feb 11
how low.... i can beg... i can sign a contract to sell my organ when i die. or sign a contract that my body can be kadavers...
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
which is not the same as lying to somebody to get money from them
@thesids (22358)
• Bhubaneswar, India
26 Feb 11
Hi dawnald Desperate! In which sphere would decide how low I can go. Definitely nothing when I am low on income or jobless but a yes when I have to if it involves anyone in my immediate family. I believe we are all puppets in the hands of time and it is the time that decides what we become and sincerely pray that none of us ever have to face such situations where we have no other choice but to go low
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
I guess we don't really know what we are capable of until we are actually put into a desperate situation...
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
26 Feb 11
I have lied to get money! When I was younger I did lie to my parents for money. Mostly for car repairs that didn't need to be done. I did this mostly because I felt it was a way of getting back at them(especailly my dad) for being lousey parents. I don't think they knew I was doing this and I knew my parents had some money. My parents never went anywhere so I didn't care I was taking their money. I wasn't desperate but lately when I have been I don't get help from my dad. He said he can't because 7 years a go a nephew needed a lawyer for killing someone so he helped my younger brother get a good lawyer. I never asked and never will know how much it cost but it isn't any of my busniess. So now a days I rarely get money from dad when needed! If I need help I rely on a friend for like car repairs. I pay him back. My dad I never has or will. Another way to get back at him. So I never have learnt to save money for things I really should! If I truly get in a desperate mess I have no idea what I will do! I'll be screwed! I better win the lottery someday!
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
1 16 19 23 45 10 :d
• United States
26 Feb 11
Before I would take advantage of anothers hard earned money. I would do something that I would normally not do. it would break my heart in two as well. But,I would feel better in the morning about it nad have to live with my decision. I think this person was wrong sick sister or not.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
1 Mar 11
yeah, she should have been honest, and I bet they would have sent her the money....
• United States
6 Mar 11
not that low.i'm the type that doesn't like asking anyone for anything,no matter how dire the need.i'm pretty stubborn.