School Reunion: I Want to Attend But Cant Due to HIM!!!
By Bannybanzie
@Bannybanzie (1397)
Philippines
May 19, 2011 7:15am CST
My elementary classmates decided that we should have a reunion. I really wanted to attend so I decided that I will attend. It is a night swimming. I decided to bring my brother with me so my parents would not be troubled.
Then, a day before the reunion (which will happen tomorrow night), I saw this former classmate of mine! It was terrible! When I remembered that he was actually my classmate and therefore was also invited, I had second thoughts whether or not to attend!
He caused my misery back in elementary. He was so obsessed with me back then. I think people are going to say that I'm boastful, but I'm not. He was like a stalker and I even had to ask my mom to personally talk to his parents for him to stop! He was older than me. Back then, I always looked like an innocent little girl so quiet in a corner. He was so desperate to be close to me in a bad way.
He cannot be someone I can make friends with because he is just so annoying and bad. I just cannot explain how terrible he is.
Should I attend or not?.. I'm still deciding... I'm scared he might come also and do something bad... That's what scares me... I'm really hesitating right now. I miss my classmates but I'm scared. What should I do...?
Some advice please.
5 people like this
13 responses
@thinkingoutloud (6127)
• Canada
19 May 11
Why should you miss out on a class reunion because of one guy that bothered you so long ago? We all had trouble with various people, for many different reasons, when we were in school. I went to my high school reunion and I can promise you I didn't speak to every single person there. You are not going alone and there is going to be a big group in attendance. I can't imagine why you would be scared. You said you saw the guy and "remembered" that he had been a classmate of yours... so it would seem, from that statement, that he hasn't been after you all this time since you left school. No one in their right mind is going to do anything bad to you in front of a big group of people. If he tried, he would surely be escorted out. If he bothers you that much, just make sure not to allow yourself to get into any situation where you are alone with him, that's all. For all you know, he might not even be there. Not everyone is interested in attending such events. If you miss your classmates, go to the reunion and see them :)
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
19 May 11
My high school friends and I used to talk about reunions being something stupid and is something we wouldn't want to participate in until last Christmas. We always thought that people were just too boastful and bad that we didn't think that it would be a miserable night. However, last Christmas season one of our batchmate insisted and too the responsibility of creating a reunion and weird enough a lot came, including us.
Perhaps she was just some neutral girl belonging in nobody's group that meeting her wasn't a threat to any group. All in all, I was glad we came, we had a blast and it's truly amazing to see that people indeed mature over time and though the 'fun' is still there, people are more attuned to remembering the good rather than the bad and it's just nice to share these memories with the people you grew up with!
I say go ahead, go for it. I'm pretty sure he's over you and perhaps it was just a phase. If he's still like that though, you could always file a restraining order - no biggy.
hahahahaha
Good luck!
1 person likes this
@owlwings (43915)
• Cambridge, England
19 May 11
It was a long while ago. There's every chance that he's grown up by now. Besides, you will be among a lot of people who ARE friends and you will have your brother with you.
@Bannybanzie (1397)
• Philippines
19 May 11
Well, yeah, that might be some time ago. The problem is I still sometimes see him from time to time and whenever I see him I can still see that he's still that stalker guy. He just cannot get any closer because I got my mom with me but at times when I'm alone he approaches and asks me questions and I just feel so uncomfortable. He's a scary man for me... I just hope things are going to go well. Thanks though.
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
22 May 11
Hi. Bannybanzie. I think that you should not let his presence of him being at the school reunion stop you from going. I think that you should still go anyway. Hopefully he is a changed person and not the same creep/stalker that he was in elementary school. It is sad that you still feel terrible thoughts about him.
He must have been really irritating and delusional around you, for you to still feel this way about him. I think that you should still attend your school reunion. Don't let the thought or sight of him intimidate you at all. I think that you should bring your brother with you, just as you have said? How old is your brother? If he is older in age, then great. Maybe your brother can act as an shield and this guy won't even think about giving you any trouble. I hope that he will just be a really changed guy after all of these years, I hope. I hope that you will be safe. My words to you would be to not go alone with this old classmate anywhere at all. Enjoy yourself!
He must have been really irritating and delusional around you, for you to still feel this way about him. I think that you should still attend your school reunion. Don't let the thought or sight of him intimidate you at all. I think that you should bring your brother with you, just as you have said? How old is your brother? If he is older in age, then great. Maybe your brother can act as an shield and this guy won't even think about giving you any trouble. I hope that he will just be a really changed guy after all of these years, I hope. I hope that you will be safe. My words to you would be to not go alone with this old classmate anywhere at all. Enjoy yourself!
@allknowing (130292)
• India
19 May 11
It would be better if you found out a bit more about this guy through some source as much water would have flown under the bridge since your last encounter with him.
Times and circumstances can change a person. Anyway you will not be alone with him and there certainly would be codes of conduct at this gathering that would discourage this guy from behaving in a manner that would upset you.
@Bannybanzie (1397)
• Philippines
19 May 11
I just hope you're right. I hope things will work out well and he hold his manners. Anyways, my dad said he doubt that guy is going to come.. and I just hope he does not come. Thanks.
@penrockerchic (1903)
• Philippines
19 May 11
Don't be bothered by him. He's just one person in a crowd and besides, you're going to be with your brother right? So if that's the case, don't let a guy ruin the chance for you to see your other classmates especially those who meant a lot to you back then. It's just a day or a night if I must say. If he tries to annoy you in any weird way, you can always try to make your way out of that situation and mingle with your other former classmates. Also, it's been years and since you said it was during your elementary years then maybe, he won't even really remember what he was doing back then. Don't let him be the reason why you're not going to that reunion.
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
20 May 11
I totally agree with penrockerchic. Don't let your fear of him, prevent you from enjoying the event. Your brother is there to protect you plus your former classmates and organizers will surely do something to prevent unpleasantness from him, just in case.
@swanny686 (150)
• United States
20 May 11
move on, people change. it sounds kinda like your unwilling to believe that he's changed. i doubt that he is the same as he was in elementary
@eurekafemme (5877)
• Philippines
19 May 11
Sometimes kids do stupids things without realizing that we are already affecting other children in a negative way.
Hey, it was a very long time ago. He might have change after all these years. If you are scared enough, you can bring an older relative with you, someone who can protect you against this classmate of yours just in case he would attack you or something.
However, it is useless to attend such reunion when all you are going to do the whole time is to keep an eye on him and worry for the rest of the event. Don't go there if you will only stressed yourself. You will not enjoy the event after all so what is the use of going?
It is your choice. Goodluck and stay safe.;)
@Metatronik (6199)
• Pasay, Philippines
19 May 11
If I am in your position then definitely I WILL NOT ATTEND! I am thankful that I've never experienced that thing but I am also a girl who would feel the same way that you are scared about. He might stalk to you all over again like so crazy. You must inform your classmate especially your friends about your situation if they are a friend then of course it is understood that they should understand your feeling. Even if they gave you some points of assurance that he won't do it then don't follow because you are not sure with the guy's attitude. Once again DON'T GO! It is better to be safe than sorry.
@marimarj23 (124)
• Philippines
20 May 11
If that stalking thing happened during your elementary years and that was many years ago then I think he must have changed already. Maybe he was just childish then. I think he is more mature now. And besides you will let your brother accompany you. You also have lots of classmates and batch mates in the reunion so why do you have to worry so much. You can attend but make sure you are in the sight of many people so whatever will happen many people are there to help you out.
But the final decision is still up to you. If you don't feel good to have a reunion with him then don't attend.
@heavenrenz (190)
•
19 May 11
Face your fear,I believe that people change as years go by ,probably at this time he will no longer stalk you. It is best for you to go and find yourself what he would be, anyway your going with your brother so you don't have to worry and I think your classmate will not also allow their fellow classmate to be harmed.
@quadj130 (25)
• United States
20 May 11
Not sure how much time has passed since then, but off the top of my head I would say that that person probably changed quite a bit from that time and not to worry too much about it. Still, I would keep my distance from them and try not to spark any sort of conversation that would lead into what happened in the past. If its been anything shorter than 5+ years then I might not go. Sometimes it takes more than a few years for people to grow out of some really bad habits regarding how to treat others.
I sorry to hear you had such a bad experience with this person in the past. If you do decide to confront him in anyway, don't hesitate to let him know that your not that shy girl in the corner anymore and you can stand your own ground.
