People That Think They Are All That

@KrauseHome (36448)
United States
July 1, 2011 12:53pm CST
Why does it seem like sometimes there are people in your life that you meet, that no matter how hard you try, they continue to think they are better than you, or jut never want to take the time to get to know you without wanting to Judge you, and make you feel inferior to where you almost want to say "Hey, Unless you have walked in my shoes some I would watch who you Judge." Sometimes I even think "What goes around comes around, and it might not feel so good." For some reason with all the Health problems I have been dealing with lately, it seems like more people are always wanting to Judge me and say it is my own fault I am having issues like this, and if I took better care of myself I would not have all the medical problems that I have. Have they never heard of Heredity, or things happening beyond your control? Did I ask to have Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, Chronic Wounds, and now Fibromyalga? Is it my fault that these are all issues, except for the Chronic Wounds my Mom had to deal with. She also had Heart problems that killed her, so maybe people just do not always understand. Sometimes then there are the people that believe in Healing and big time Prayer Warriors that say I do not have enough Faith. Ok, personally if that were the case, I would be in a Wheelchair or only have one leg, and would have had to have some form of Heart surgery a week ago. God does heal and answer Prayers for me, just not on everything that is going on. But these people need to learn to be a little more understanding and little less judgemental and try and think "What if it was me being treated like this?" There are days where it is hard to stay strong and not get discouraged. Look at all I have been thru just the last 2 weeks. Staph infection in my leg, Chest pains that put me in the Hospital, being confirmed with having Fibromyalga and now the starting of treatment again in a wound clinic withn the chronic wounds on my leg. Overall even the days or times I feel a little down, depressed and discouraged I know God is in control and there are many people out there Praying for me. I just wish the others could jump a little more on a caring understanding Band Wagon as well. ~~TINA~~
8 people like this
27 responses
• United States
1 Jul 11
Hi Tina! Sadly these people are are mentioning will simply be who they are. We cannot control what people feel and think and believe me I did spend a great deal of time in my past trying to figure people out, when finally I concluded that we simply can't waste life and efforts on what people say or think. I know it is hurtful, especially due to your kind nature, but what I suggest is to try what you can and not exert any stress and or time about them and simply allow them to face life their way. Some day they may see how cruel they have been, yet you have always remained loyal to yourself. I would suggest not to comment back to anyone who does not say nice things to you and show them you are the bigger person as some day they will see how kind are you. I do know that you have gone through so many issues and am always praying for better health for you.
3 people like this
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
15 Aug 11
Personally even with my Boss I work for, the reason they continue to say things and treat me the way that they do, is because they have never been where I am at, and had to suffer with what I am going thru. I would not wish it on anyone, but believe me when they condemn others it could come back to bite them.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Jul 11
HWG hi also dont you think these people who judge are also cowardly and if they were facing a person who is well and hale and hearty they would not have the gall to say what they did to Tina. Mostly cowardly people who pick on someone who is ill with several issues and presume to tell them they did this to themselves.but your advice to Tina is priceless and Iwould have said the same thing. one day their words will come b ack arou nd and bite them on their as.s.es.We here will all join in our mylot prayers for good health again for Tina.
• United States
1 Jul 11
Hi Mrs. Hatley, Gosh yes they are cowards and really bad people. Why would anyone speak wrongful words about anyone experiencing health issues. If anything as good people we provide positivity. I do know that not everyone is good in the world but the ole saying comes to mind that if you have nothing good to say they should not say anything at all. That is sad because illness shows no discrimination and one could be sick in a drop of a pin and wow how can anyone burn bridges. An ill person can later when well and or still undergoing illnesses can provide a lot of emotional support. Which is what I believe Tina will always do as she has been through a great deal. Yes will will firmly continue t pray for her.
3 people like this
@manleyjoe (1597)
• United States
1 Jul 11
Hi Tina, God be with you. I don't think any of us ever wants to be sickly but some of us are predestined to be so, whether it be heredity or self induced we don't want or need it. In my case I have brought on some of the conditions that I have. Granted My mother had diabetes as well as my father, so maybe that is why I have it but then growing up and in my late teens me diet was not any help. So I would advise you to try your best to deal with what you have and forget what others think. If you are asking for the opinion of others then stop asking if you are hearing what you want.
2 people like this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Jul 11
manleyjoe as an older diabetic I want to add my two cents worth for one thing these who are always telling people like Tina they are to blame do not really know a thing. back in my fifties we did not have a lot of the information we now have about diabetes and what some of the main causes are. for instance had I known that your fifties is when you often gain extra weight and now they know that extra weight is the cause of a lot of people getting type 2 in their fifties. had I known at that age that my overweight could and would cause diabetes I would have worked to lose weight and keep it off so as to not become another diabetes statistic. but I did not know then what I know now.
2 people like this
@manleyjoe (1597)
• United States
1 Jul 11
Hat, I'm glad that you are here you have said what I was trying to but you did it so much better, thank you. Like you said if I had followed the directions of the nutritionist at the time I would not have let myself get in shape to be fighting the diabetes and heart disease now.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
11 Jul 11
Well I am not overweight, even though I weigh about 20 pds. more than when I was first put on Insulin. (At one time it was over 60 pds, but was able to loose a lot of it due to med change.) The weight has never been a part of mine. Most of mine is heredity as my Mom's side of the family has Diabetes. Mine also is now considered Type 1.5 which has a lot of type 1 simularities due to other Health issues as well. So mine is very complex and interesting but do what I can to try and keep it under control.
@peavey (16936)
• United States
1 Jul 11
Do I ever understand that. I've been hit with a couple of serious health problems over the last few years and there are certain people who think that I should be healed because they prayed for me. Like you, I know that God answers prayers and He has healed me of other things before. We don't know why He doesn't at times, but we can trust Him to do what is really right for us. Others don't understand and I suspect that they can't, unless they go through some tough times, too. I have to remind myself that they simply don't know and that makes it easier for me to deal with.
1 person likes this
@peavey (16936)
• United States
11 Jul 11
God has healed me of things before, too. Because He hasn't chosen to, or is doing it a different way, this time, doesn't mean He can't or won't or that there's something wrong with me that stops His healing. He's bigger than that!
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
15 Aug 11
That is so true. Many times we can be the ones stopping God from healing and bringing us the blessings like he wants too. We need to quit allowing ourselves and others to stand in the way.
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
11 Jul 11
Yes, it can be frustrating as there will be many people praying over you when you have a lot of Health problems, and many expeciting God to heal you and when he does not say you do not have enough Faith. But when it does not maybe it is not his time or there are other things he needs you to experience first. With me God has healed me of a lot of things and is continuing to move. Some people just seem to think it is not Fast enough.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
9 Jul 11
Who is to say why we do the things we do, make the choices we make? Do you know why...I certainly don't most of the time. No-one makes a conscious decision to eat too much, smoke too much, eat the wrong foods, drink too much and so on. I was beaten as a 2 yr old and I have recently found out that when small children have been abused in any way that the chemicals in their brain change. I reckon it's safe to say my life was not going to be a bed of roses. Life can be hell when we are not well. Luckily for them, some people don't suffer from ill health and so they don't understand what we go through. They are acting from ignorance when they judge us or fail to understand us...one day, when they are older, they will understand. It happens to all of us.
1 person likes this
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
1 Jul 11
I don't understand them either!!! I just try & remind myself that God made them judgmental for a reason!!! One more word of advice...NOBODY can make you feel inferior without YOUR permission!!! When I feel somebody is even trying to make me feel inferior, I pray for them as I feel maybe they need it a little MORE than I do!!! Almost 25 years ago I had several major medical problems & in thinking about it, I could pinpoint EVERYTHING I had done that lead up to my problems. I felt soooo freakin stupid for having done some of the things I had done!!! I was a wild child & believed in thoroughly ENJOYING my life!!! Looking back at the way my life unfolded, I think my illness was God's way of saying "it's time to slow down Missy"!!! And once I slowed down, He gave me some of the most WONDERFUL blessings!!! Now instead of seeing my illness as a curse, I see it as one of my blessings!!! Maybe one of those judgmental people are carrying a lesson for you & where your life needs to go??? Maybe thinking a little different will prepare you for YOUR blessings to come??? You know a lot of your friends here are praying for you don't you???
@manleyjoe (1597)
• United States
1 Jul 11
LadyMarissa, good advise I have seen this in the past and for myself we sometimes can find so much pleasure from life's trials if we look from another angle.
1 person likes this
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
1 Jul 11
It's all in finding the right angle from which to look!!!
1 person likes this
@margeryann (1845)
• United States
1 Jul 11
I replied to this already but after I posted the response. It said that I needed to be logged in then it didn't send me back to where I wrote.This has happened before. It would be nice if it would but I will try to say what I already said. What you are going through kind of reminds me of what I went through after I had a car accident and started going to a chiropractor. After she would give me the treatments she would invite her massage therapist in the room and they would pray for me to get well.I didn't see nothing wrong with that. I thought it was kind of neat and they always played Cristian Music in the rooms that was playing the whole time. One of the days she told me that I didn't have enough faith that is why I wasn't healed yet.It made me very upset because I believe in god. I have faith. I've seen the miracles of prayer but I also know that prayer doesn't always fix things.It was stressful enough wondering if I would ever be the same then to hear that.She always talked like she didn't believe in doctors because she felt that prayer would heal. I thought it was strange that she was in the profession that she was in if she felt just prayer fixed everything.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (85496)
• United States
1 Jul 11
What a messed up lady she must have been.
• United States
1 Jul 11
That's what I thought! It made me think that she just went to school to be a chiropractor so she could get paid for praying to people. It was awful!
1 person likes this
• Canada
14 Aug 11
I have my own challenges (legally blind, physically challenged when it comes to walking, and I have Aspergers syndrome). I get people like that all the time, and when I do, I just get as far away from them as possible. I have notime for people who want to judge me, or act like they are better than me. If they have to be that way, then they are clearly NOT better than I am.
@AmbiePam (85496)
• United States
1 Jul 11
Oh my word, the one about people saying you don't have enough faith - that makes me so mad. This one woman on mylot, to my knowledge she is still here although I took her off my friend list. My uncle was dying, he had no brain activity and they were about to take him off the ventilator. And this mylotter told me I just didn't have enough faith because I was acting like he was going to die. Oh, so if I just believe it will happen, my uncle would be alive (of course me and my entire family had been praying)? Puh-lease! And then she got angry when I took offense at that. I don't know about you, but when your uncle is about to die, hearing someone say he wouldn't if you had enough faith is not helpful. And then she sais, oh, I thought you were a Christian (she knew I was a Christian, she was being sarcastic.) People like that tick me off. Telling other if they enough faith they would be healed. That if they had enough faith certain things would never happen. Ugh!
• United States
2 Jul 11
That is awful someone saying that to you about your uncle. It is hard enough having to deal with someone dying then to have someone blame you for them dying. That is awful. I bet that was upsetting and very maddening.Some people never think of other peoples feelings when they say things.
1 person likes this
@daeckardt (6237)
• United States
4 Jul 11
It seems ridiculous that people always think people with chronic problems are just faking it or not praying enough or whatever. I know that there are conditions that a person can't control and I see no reason why other people can't be a little more understanding! I really hope that those people will see the light and stop being so judgemental because it really isn't fair to you. Have a great week!!!
@_sketch_ (5742)
• United States
2 Jul 11
People these days overly identify with the ego and the ego can only survive as a comparison between things. So, if we are good, others must be bad. You just have to remember that for the most part, people just don't understand that everyone has a unique experience and no one can really be compared - it's apples and oranges. What goes around does come around and when people treat you badly, they are filling their hearts with anger and fear and that's never a good feeling, so they are immediately affecting themselves in a negative way. People probably want to blame the illnesses on you because if it's your fault that means that you are in control. If it's not your fault though, then that means that it could happen to anyone, including themselves. Hate is a defense mechanism against fear. People do need to be more understanding and less judgmental, but just remember that you too have not walked in their shoes and it may not be so easy for them not to judge. I know that this doesn't change anything and what they say can still hurt. Just remember that you still have a lot of really great things in your life. I do not know much about your life, but I know this is true because there are a lot of great things in everyone's life. Some people just don't recognize it as much. Something that could be beneficial to you is meditation. I personally love it, but maybe it is not everyone's cup of tea. Well good luck and have a wonderful day. :)
@dismalgrin (2604)
• United States
5 Jul 11
I think that you have a very good attitude about you conditions. There are a lot of diseases in life that we cannot help and people will look down on you for them because of what they hear and much of it is half truths. For example, I know a lot of people that got lung cancer that never smoked a day of their life and yet people treat them like they are bad people and must of done that to themselves. I have HPV... which is a sexually transmitted disease, but I was in a monogamist relationship when I got it. Well, I was being faithful... he wasn't. Does that make it my fault that I got stuck with the disease? It shouldn't... I didn't know what he was doing, I left him when I found out though. Keep on keeping on, and maintain that healthy attitude you have. I will keep you in my thoughts.
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
3 Jul 11
I'm ok with other people being better than me. In fact, I hope most people are better than me. That would be pretty sad, if they were not.
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
9 Jul 11
I think you can never really get away from people like these. I've often encountered people like these everywhere. Ready to judge, and proclaim themselves better by the color of their skin, or by the clothes they are wearing, etc. Sometimes, I even fall into this kind of wrong attitude. When I also judge people. I guess it's just part of being human. It's times like these that I give myself a smack on the head.
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
6 Jul 11
KH: I can empathise you. You are not responsible for this status. It depends on one's own genes- plus other factors over which u have no control. Some people do not each sugar. still they have diabetes. some people do exercises properly they have heart problem. For you problems have come. I am following ur discussions for 2 or 3 weeks and praying for quick recovery. you will recover. do not lose heart. are u going for job? keep going.
@clocks123 (1225)
• United States
2 Jul 11
hello. i know what you are saying. i found these two individuals who i wanted to be friends with judged me because of my health problems, and financial status. i don't have a home. i rent. etc. you get the idea, right. they stopped emailing me. i liked them and they hurt me. as far as you not having enough faith, ignore these individuals. of course you do. do not listen to their negativity. keep praying. the Lord hears your prayers. He will be with you always. i have my faith. it gets me through. i have numerous health issues too. i hope and pray for you to get through all of your health issues. i pray you will be feeling better. take it one day at a time. the best to you always.
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
2 Jul 11
Tina dear, have you ever heard of the saying "It takes all kinds to make our world"? Unfortunetly, it is true. We have pretend to be doctors who think they know more about us than we do ourselves! We have all sorts of people who think they know this and that and the other better than we do! However, what each and every one of us have is the ability to ignore them. Or you could rant and rave and get your blood pressure all up haywire which you know will do no good so why bother? Why not say something that'll make them take a step back? Like, "I'm thankful of your response because it's apparent you know my situation better than I do! Have a great day!" and leave them to wallow in their own hateful words.
@celticeagle (159058)
• Boise, Idaho
2 Jul 11
I think we all could eat alot better. And we all need to be proactive in our health and medicals situations. That goes for all of us. I am just saying I think we could all do better in this regard. Religious fenatics are very judgemental. As if they are the only ones that know anything. Just one more reason I am an agnostic. I guess the bottom line is this: You do what you can do and do not listen to these fanatics. People who think they are better or smarter or whatever. I would just be as polite as possible and move on. I ignore people that are fanatical or just out there, think they are better, etc. Let them live in their own little gilded world.
@celticeagle (159058)
• Boise, Idaho
2 Jul 11
I think we all could eat alot better. And we all need to be proactive in our health and medicals situations. That goes for all of us. I am just saying I think we could all do better in this regard. Religious fenatics are very judgemental. As if they are the only ones that know anything. Just one more reason I am an agnostic. I guess the bottom line is this: You do what you can do and do not listen to these fanatics. People who think they are better or smarter or whatever. I would just be as polite as possible and move on. I ignore people that are fanatical or just out there, think they are better, etc. Let them live in their own little gilded world.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
2 Jul 11
There are many who feel we bring illness on ourselves, well that may be so, but I have watched several of these people and they get sick also. I do know that if I let up for just a short time my immune system falls apart and I catch something. But if you are dealing with chronic illnesss, no matter how well you treat yourself it remains in the background. I feel I know you well enough to say that you most likely push yourself to hard and encounter a lot of stress, but this is just an observation from an outsider. If you take time to examine your life habits you can pinpoint things more than any outsider. Once you have a list you can choose to take the necessary measures to correct these. Whatever you do the result will come slowly, healing always seem slower than illness. Don't listen to what others say unless you feel they might see something about your situation that you have not considered. Blessings
• Pakistan
2 Jul 11
I really hate people who think as if they are everything in this world.You have really discussed it well.Thank you for sharing your views!