How much does your family know about you? I mean, really?

@maezee (31933)
United States
February 5, 2012 11:38am CST
I love my dad to death but I feel like he remembers nothing about me - what's going on in my life, what my preferences are, etc. I was really happy when I came home (I live with him) and he bought me lunch from the bar! (He won on pull tabs, and felt bad for me later, I found out). He got me a veggie wrap (soooo good) but he got me tater tots on the side. Anyone I know knows that I HATE tater tots with a PASSION. I don't know why this is, but the sight/smell of them grosses me out. I love my dad for the effort, but it's somewhat laughable that he doesn't remember my likes and dislikes. He also bought me some Diet Coke from the grocery store. Also a very nice deed, and quite unusual as usually he's very staunch about me buying my own stuff. I used to love Diet Coke, until I quit drinking pop about ~3 months ago. Is this just the way men are? Sweet, with good intentions, but utterly clueless?
5 responses
@yaso4u (502)
• India
11 Feb 12
Hi maezee, My family does not know more about me, they just imagine that I like this and I like that but most of the time they were in wrong side. After age of 20, there is big gap between me and my parents and sharing between us were reduced to greater extend. Hence this may be the reason for such misunderstanding.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
8 Feb 12
Sounds about right! As far as men goes I think (for me at least). We could go all out and be sweet and have good intentions, yet we could go clueless about some details. I've been away from my parents since I was 17. So I doubt they know much about me. Often times when I talk to them on the phone, I feel like they are still talking to a 17-year old!
• United States
6 Feb 12
Have you talked to him about it? Some men are definitely oblivious to those kinds of things...But women are also known for being to subtle and not straight enough to the point. Maybe if you let him know how you really feel, he'll be able to recognize the problem and make an effort to get to know you more.
• Philippines
6 Feb 12
Your family should know everything about you. There are some things of course, personal things that we are unable to share with them. But still, this would keep an open relationship with your family which can avoid misunderstanding in the future.
@echomonster (2227)
• Greenwood, Mississippi
5 Feb 12
I think parents often have a tough time remembering their children's preferences because they change so much over time. Your dad may still be remembering what you liked when you were a little kid (or may be just remembering what he used to get for you then, whether you actually liked it or not!). He's got a lot of years of memories of you to wade through and for him the memories of your childhood may be even more vivid than his memories of you last week! Then again, some people just see other people's preferences through the prism of their own tastes -- if THEY like tater tots, they'll just assume everyone else does too and nothing will convince them otherwise. I would say my mother is fairly aware of my interests and preferences. We actually talk more now than we did when I was a child, and I think that's key...you have to set aside time to have in-depth conversations about how you feel about things. That can be tough to do if you're sharing living space and having petty arguments about stuff that doesn't really matter. That said, I wouldn't say the rest of my family knows all that much about me; my father's passed away and I rarely talk to either of my sisters who live on the other side of the country.