Friends really "friends" on Facebook?...

United States
April 16, 2012 2:19pm CST
Really? 80% of the people that request you as friends, wouldn't say 2 words to you on the street if they saw you. Why? Do people really have the urge to have that many friends on their list?
5 people like this
13 responses
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
16 Apr 12
I do have friends that I don't talk to on facebook but I do know them and I would talk to them on the street. I have about 73 friends on my page, and that might seem like a lot but I've seen others were around 200!
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Apr 12
This is true of some. But for example some people from high school(not necessarily who I was friends with), that I see out in public all the time and never even a wave, but then I get friend requests from them.
1 person likes this
@sk66rc (4261)
• United States
16 Apr 12
This is one of the reasons why I took people off my list. Now I have 128 people on my list & I see & speak to about 90% of them on a regular basis, of course some more than others. Some of them I see 2 - 3 times a week & some I see 1 - 2 times a month. Some of them I see 4 - 5 times a week but that's only because I work with them. I don't know why people need to have so many people on their list. I guess it's more of ego thing than anything else.
1 person likes this
@skizzer (36)
• Denmark
16 Apr 12
I think that is a very central question! "Friends" on facebook are definitely not equivelant to real life friends! That is to say, some "friends" you have on facebook are not at all real friends. I think some people find it cool to have a long friend list, though I don't exactly see why. Some people just like the attention and conceived popularity, I guess. Friends on facebook cover more than your real life friends. I think they more broadly cover your social circle and people whom you might know sometime or whom you happen to see randomly.
@soulist (2987)
• United States
19 Apr 12
I was wondering the same thing. I have a few people on my friend's list that I never really spoke too, some from high school that were mean to me and made fun of me in high school. I have to wonder why did I add them onto my list. Was it because i felt an obligation to include people I went to high school with?
• United States
19 Apr 12
That's exactly what was on my mind. Just because they "know" who we are doesn't mean they "know" us and vice versa. This is not for social reasons, because they don't ever message them or talk to them in public, so what is the real purpose? Like you said, do we feel obligated? It's very interesting to me.
@KrauseHome (35522)
• United States
19 Apr 12
Personally for me I think it really depends on the purpose you were setting out for. I feel there is nothing wrong with a person having a lot of friends on Facebook if they enjoy meeting others. I know I use Facebook for many different purposes such as Networking, Friendship, etc. and have people in there I have known for many yrs, some only a few, and then there are those I have never really met in person but due to other things, like being friends here in myLot I have taken a chance to get to know. Would we like each other in person? You never know. But personally I feel Facebook like life is what you want to make of it, and can be a quite useful tool.
@rekhum (2434)
• India
19 Apr 12
Its true..I'd also not hesitate in getting to know more of the person in real, who is in my friends list, when my purpose for the Facebook is networking and making new friendships. Hats off for your sensible response!
@megamatt (14327)
• United States
17 Apr 12
See on Facebook, friends are not really friends for the most part, but merely just a statistic to make you look better than other people. At least that is what it seems like for a lot of Facebook users. "Oh I have these many friends but only you have these many friends. What a loser?" It is really just another way to make themselves look better than people. A rather petty way to really make themselves look better then people. I don't have much to do with Facebook, thankfully but what is a friend on Facebook? Someone to bombard with stupid game requests and pad your statistics apparently. In general, the real friends you have on Facebook are also going to be the people that you talk to in the real world. Everyone else is just a statistic. Some people feel the need to have a really big friend list on Facebook. Which makes me think some of those individuals might be compensating for something.
@rekhum (2434)
• India
19 Apr 12
I truly agree with your thoughts. I too have a friend at work who'd sent me a friend request to me and i accepted. To this date, we have not greeted each other, although we bumped into each other all weekdays. lol
• United States
22 Apr 12
This is an excellent discussion! Most people do not want to see the truth in this. Personally, I had no idea that people I knew from the past would treat me so rudely. You write them a note asking them to befriend you. They add you, but they do not respond to your note. You write on their page, and they ignore you. Others see you in person, and it is very awkward. They really don't want to talk to you. Adding them was a mistake on my part. I thought we would be very happy to reconnect. It is embarrassing to me to be treated this way. I would rather they be honest and just say, "You know what? I have grown since I last talked to you. I did not like you then and surely, I won't like you now. So, just go away. Gee, I feel so much better now!"
@rekhum (2434)
• India
19 Apr 12
May be its because 80% of the lot may think its just a virtual networking site. And yes, its the virtual world at the end of the day. So I agree my virtual friends may not greet me or recognise me on the street and vice-versa. But i also feel only the people who are not very sociable in the reality world may have that urge to have that too many friends on their friends list.
17 Apr 12
Friends on facebook are of course un-comparable to real life friends. Like me I have 200+ friends on facebook because my account is private and I only accept people whom I really know, but only 10+ of that is my real friends in life.
@chiyosan (30204)
• Philippines
17 Apr 12
i think you are correct with what you said here, and well that is exactly true, i have a few friends in facebook that i am even with work right now but we would just look at each other and smile and that's it. we never talk and never talk in facebook too. i am not into befriending everyone i know, but hey, i am not the type to not approve people in facebook who wants to be friends with me. 90% of the friends i have are those who added me and not the other way around. he he
@maezee (33009)
• United States
16 Apr 12
No, you are definitely right, most of the "friends" on Facebook are not friends at all. Maybe they aren't even acquaintances or co-workers, maybe they are just mutual friends of friends. I have a few people added on FB that I know I wouldn't hang out with in real life. Which kind of defeats the purpose of calling them "friends". *shrugs*
@cairalyssa (1405)
• Malaysia
16 Apr 12
I have 2 fb account, one is my personal account where i am very selective approving who ever request to be my fren and i only add people i really know. The other one is my biz account where i add random people as many as possible. I dunno who they are, but i make friend with them and i get sales daily from my biz account. Im also an owner of a group called FB likes exchange, where i gather everybody from the whole world to share likes and votes..
@ellie333 (21029)
16 Apr 12
Hi Ethansmom, I have a very large list on FB but can put them in groups, I have my real friends, my work colleagues, myLot friends and my game playing friends. I interact with many each day but my real friends I talk to and see rather than just on Facebook.