"Hello, I am from...

Pixabay - phone support
By pgn
@pgntwo (22405)
Derry, Northern Ireland
December 23, 2016 10:12am CST
...Microsoft Corporation. May I speak with the lady of the house, please?", said the heavy female Indian-sounding voice "Ah. She's busy, can I help?", said I. Caller: "Yes, Sir, your wife asked me to call back, it is about her computer.". My eyebrows can raise no further, but I thought we'd see where this one was going... Me: "Like I said, the lady of the house is busy and is unable to come the phone right now.". "It is important that I speak with her. Please can you ask her to take this call?". "She is unable to get to the phone, how can I help?". "You realise this is Microsoft Corporation calling? There is a problem with her computer. She asked me to call back.". "Oh. Microsoft. Yes, you said. I am sure she has no problem with her computer. You may be mistaken.". "No, Sir, she definitely asked me to call her. Please let me talk to her. Her computer has a problem.". "I am sure I would have heard about it if my wife was having a problem with her computer.". "I am calling you because Marie said to call her back. Let me speak to her.". "There is no-one here called Marie. There is no-one here having trouble with a Microsoft-based computer.". "OK. Are you not letting me talk to her? I am going to terminate her licence now.". "There is no-one here called Marie. There is no-one here with a problem with their computer. Maybe you have the wrong number?". "No, I have the correct number. Can I speak with your wife, please, Sir?". "No. She's busy. And her computer is working fine.". "You are not going to let me speak with her?". "She did not ask you to call her, plus she's otherwise occupied right now.". "OK, I am being forced to cancel her computer licence.". "That sounds serious. Are you sure I cannot help?". "OK. I am cancelling her computer licence with Microsoft.". >click<. What is it that drives these people?
29 people like this
28 responses
@DWDavis (25797)
• United States
23 Dec 16
When I get those type of calls, I just hang up. I loved seeing in the news recently that Indian police had rounded up a whole gang of those people who were scamming Americans by claiming to be the IRS. One of them called me and claimed to be from the IRS. I told him I worked with the IRS (not a lie, I prepared tax returns for a living) and I would know if there were any problems with my taxes. He hung up. Never heard from them again.
9 people like this
• Philippines
23 Dec 16
i guess they crossed you off their list when you said that
5 people like this
• Philippines
23 Dec 16
@DWDavis they'd get confused and think they have the wrong name or number - or country!
5 people like this
@DWDavis (25797)
• United States
23 Dec 16
@hereandthere My son's way of dealing with such calls is to start speaking German, which he is conversant in, and most of these scammers don't have a clue about.
7 people like this
@topffer (42155)
• France
23 Dec 16
I think that I would have been less patient than you : there is no Mrs Topffer, and I do not use any Microsoft product, Skype excepted.
6 people like this
@topffer (42155)
• France
23 Dec 16
@pgntwo I have never received a call from this kind of scammers. I receive mainly text messages or calls from premium rate numbers, in the hope that I will call back. I never call back an unknown number if they do not leave a consistent message.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Those are handy get-out clauses - do you think it won't stop them trying? I don't know why they even bother.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
@topffer A wise approach... a gram of prevention is better than a tonne of cure.
3 people like this
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
23 Dec 16
they are a roitten scam shame on them O went through that once and told dthem I did not want their helko mny coimouter was fiune thgb deketed it o b the web as it was gikng to blakc my c omputer rottebn scam
6 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
@Poppylicious I believe so. And BT have the gall to charge for the Caller Privacy service - more lousy marketing tactics.
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Definitely a scam, and despite my land-line phone number being on the Telephone Preference Subscriber list, still they call, hassle, cajole...
Telephone Preference Service.
3 people like this
• United Kingdom
23 Dec 16
@pgntwo TPS only works with domestic numbers, doesn't it? That's how they get away with it, by using folk based in India.
4 people like this
• United States
23 Dec 16
I'd hang up a long time ago :)
4 people like this
@amandajay (23262)
• New Zealand
23 Dec 16
same here
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
It was the third time they had called that morning... more's the pity.
3 people like this
@amandajay (23262)
• New Zealand
23 Dec 16
@pgntwo ignore it... block the number...
3 people like this
@rebelann (117246)
• El Paso, Texas
23 Dec 16
Damn, that's sooo rude. Ummm, maybe you could pretend to be your wife by switching to a higher pitched voice. Just tell the twit on the phone your name isn't Marie, it's Clementine.
5 people like this
@rebelann (117246)
• El Paso, Texas
23 Dec 16
Yep @hereandthere but I'll bet the scammers won't really get that which means @pgntwo could have some really good fun returning the scam.
4 people like this
• Philippines
23 Dec 16
and the song instantly played in my head, 'oh my darlin', oh my darlin', oh my darlin' clementine..."
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
The high-pitched thing, that might work - if I holler at em? ;)
3 people like this
@Bluedoll (16770)
• Canada
23 Dec 16
How did Marie feel about this? I don't know what they achieved at the end. Maybe call back with a second chance?
3 people like this
@Bluedoll (16770)
• Canada
23 Dec 16
Why don't you let me type to Marie. Care to do this all again.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
@Bluedoll Funny you should mention that - I got another call later the same day, when I said I hadn't used a computer in years, they cursed and hung-up the phone at their end ;)
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Dunno - no idea who or where she is...
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (209016)
• United States
24 Dec 16
It starts with M..... I try not to even answer the phone unless I have a pretty good idea who is calling.
3 people like this
@snowy22315 (209016)
• United States
24 Dec 16
@pgntwo The trouble is that some scammers buy a block of local numbers so you think that it is someone legitimate, a local business or whatever, and it is instead a scammer, debt collector, solicitor whomever you don't want to talk to.
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
@snowy22315 Is nothing safe? Trust no-one, seems to be the only way.
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
That's what caller identification is for, but when the number is "withheld", you ask yourself - is it a scammer, a sales call, or a doctor's practice, hospital or call from the school... There is that uncertainty there. I think all recognised services - hospitals, doctors, dentists, schools, health services, etc should be made to present a recognised number when they call. Then all that remains is the scam or cold-callers, and you can safely ignore the phone. Ah, if I ruled the world... ;)
2 people like this
• Pamplona, Spain
23 Dec 16
Aha, I had a call like that few months back now and I almost asked them if they were kidding. But I kept my cool and said I was doing no such thing and not going to entertain them any longer down went the phone and never heard from them since then and if they did try that again the phone would go down even quicker.
3 people like this
• Pamplona, Spain
24 Dec 16
@pgntwo There is indeed but also you are left with a feeling I wonder how many more have really fallen for it none I hope.
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
There's something quite satisfying about hanging up on someone, don't you think?
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
@lovinangelsinstead21 In reading some of the comments on this post, it seems that some who fall victim to the scam have lost, or very nearly lost, big-time.
3 people like this
@allknowing (153529)
• India
23 Dec 16
I would just disconnect after a couple of sessions but you had the patience to wait till they cancelled your wife's licence
3 people like this
@allknowing (153529)
• India
24 Dec 16
@pgntwo Oh yes. It was Marie - it slipped my mind
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
Aha - they think they did, but Marie's the one who got cut-off. Apparently...
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
@allknowing I hope they don't give Marie my number...
3 people like this
@sishy7 (27166)
• Australia
24 Dec 16
I hate scammers!!! I had one claiming from the tax office and threatening me the police would come to arrest me if I didn't pay my 'debt'. At which time, my husband walked in so I said: "Oh, the police is here now, do you want to speak to him?" And the caller hung up!
3 people like this
@sishy7 (27166)
• Australia
24 Dec 16
@DaddyEvil As soon as he hung up, I called the tax office and the police to report the scam... I hope he and the likes of him got busted!
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (174551)
• United States
24 Dec 16
@sishy7 I hope they did, too, sishy! Go read my box on this discussion. You'll see why I agree with you!
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (174551)
• United States
24 Dec 16
You may get a bill for the cost of cleaning that person's drawers, sishy! And I think it would serve you right, too! SMH! Scaring that poor caller like that!
2 people like this
@hostessman (11871)
• Tucson, Arizona
23 Dec 16
you were nice,,,i can't write what i tell the people that call my house
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
Just what they deserve, some of'em!
2 people like this
@Poppylicious (11134)
• United Kingdom
23 Dec 16
I never get these phone calls. It's most upsetting for me! How can I have fun if no one ever calls!?
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
You could've heard a pin drop another time when I told them I hadn't had a computer for years...
3 people like this
@FayeHazel (40230)
• United States
23 Dec 16
Wow that's a new one
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Perhaps, perhaps not. Persistence must pay off for them sometimes, unfortunately.
2 people like this
• Agra, India
23 Dec 16
I would have hung up...I think after a few first conversations
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
I had already hung up twice earlier in the morning, each time not even saying "Hello". Still they call...
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
@amitkokiladitya Because they call from a number that is "WITHHELD" or "Unavailable", alas.
2 people like this
• Agra, India
24 Dec 16
@pgntwo why don't you block the number
3 people like this
@dpk262006 (58679)
• Delhi, India
24 Dec 16
I am wondering was it a real or imaginary conversation? If it was real, then you must make a complain about the caller in writing (may be through an email).
2 people like this
@dpk262006 (58679)
• Delhi, India
27 Dec 16
@pgntwo - It was a scam, now it is clear to me. However, if you find time, you could shoot a mail to Microsoft stating that some miscreants and scamesters are misusing the name of Microsoft and harassing customers (like you) by unnecessary making threatening calls.
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
24 Dec 16
It is the account of a real conversation I had with someone who called my landline from a WITHHELD number earlier this week (Weds, I think!). Unfortunately, I do not know who to call, as clearly the call did not come from Microsoft, and no return number or contact information was given during the call. So I thought the best way to make people aware was to make a post about my experience. If you read some of the responses, it sounds to be a common scam, someone has even linked to an article about it from a few years ago.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
27 Dec 16
@dpk262006 I guess I could - I wonder how many such complaints they get in a week? I think the time was better spent making myLot contributors aware of the scam, rather than passing it to a corporation who don't care to hear about such matters (as is clear from the article linked ino this chain by another reader here!). It seems to be an unwritten fact of life that people will try to catch the unwary with these scams... Alas.
2 people like this
@valmnz (17095)
• New Zealand
23 Dec 16
I was hoping you'd tell her that you didn't have a wife
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
I get the feeling they would not have listened. They assumed "Marie" and "the lady of the house" were both my wife.
1 person likes this
@marlina (154103)
• Canada
23 Dec 16
Scam written all over. I just hang up.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Yet still they call...
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16568)
• Ireland
27 Dec 16
Seriously, I hate the fact they seem to target women!
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16568)
• Ireland
28 Dec 16
@pgntwo well ya I guess Microsoft won't do anything. I wouldn't mind hooking them up to an old pc and unleash some trojans welcome to the jungle
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
28 Dec 16
@Drosophila That's a thought...
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
27 Dec 16
I suppose I could have played it a different way, to try to get a contact number or other detail off them to report to Microsoft... but it went down a different track rather rapidly.
2 people like this
@xFiacre (14790)
• Ireland
23 Dec 16
@pgntwo Don't you just love messing with these people. I've had my licence revoked several times.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
I don't think I have had my licence revoked before, much less that of poor Marie, whoever she may be...
3 people like this
@nanette64 (20363)
• Fairfield, Texas
23 Dec 16
Oh good grief @pgntwo . Don't you wish you were within strangling distance of the caller?
3 people like this
@pgntwo (22405)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
23 Dec 16
Even talking distance is too close to some of those scam artists...
3 people like this