What does responsibility mean to you?  |
|
 Whenever David and I pose that questions to clients or group participants there are a myriad of responses. Oftentimes there is a tendency for people to think of responsibility in terms of whom they are responsible to or what they are responsible for. They state that responsibility involves being a 'responsible person.' Their understanding of responsibility is focused on their work, being a good parent, friend, worker or whatever else they think defines their levels of responsibility. Inarguably that is definitely one aspect of it.
By now some of you have figured out that I also like to look at things from of course...another perspective and here we go again. When you look at the work responsibility it breaks down to...response---ability. If you switch those to words around you have within it the idea that we have the ability...to choose our response. In the work we do our goal is to assist others in understanding (and accepting) that behavior is a product of choice...based on values rather than being a product of their conditions or feeling.
The difference in how people respond is affected by whether they choose to be proactive or reactive. Reactive people are much more affected by their environment. For example when life is going well...the weather is good and interpersonal relationships are running smoothly they feel good. When outward events are troublesome it can affect their attitude and overall performance.
Proactive people do not allow things like the weather, other people's reactions and life circumstances to affect their mood because they are not subordinate to impulses. So I am interested in hearing what responsibility means to you and what you think about the idea that we may not be able to control what happens to us...but we do have a choice in our 'ability' to respond in whatever way we choose.
I'll close with two quotations that summarize the theme of this topic. Eleanor Roosevelt observed, "No one can hurt you without your consent." In the words of Gandhi, "They cannot take away your self respect if we do not give it to them."
So our level of responsibility has to be outwardly directed for sure...but when all is said and done it is our willing permission or consent to how we respond to what happens to us far more than the event itself. To me it is important to keep the lessons...but release the experiences and move on. But as always this is just my viewpoint...I'd welcome yours if you'd care to offer it.
Haven't been around as much due to other work commitments...but I will keep in touch because I love our respectful dialogs and will continue to show up for them...just not as often or as long. Miss chatting when I am not here...but as the Terminator said..."I will be back!" (smile)
Warm regards to friends old and new,
Raia
| |
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1.  ssh123 (18435) | 10 months ago |  Thank you very muuch for a detailed discusson topic on Responsibility. Ialso noticed that you have quoted Gandhi, Elenor Roosevelt.
In my opinion, there should not have been a place for use of the word responsibility, if all of us do what we are expected to do. But human beings are different, varied with different levels of understanding and I.Q.s. Some understand responsibility from the time of maturity of mind, a few understand by observing others, some people are to be told about their responsibilities, some people depending on the circumstances play responsible.
By and large I see the word respnsibility is loosng its ground. Because no one wants to take the respnsibility.
Look at the politicians. They make promises before the elections and break it soon after they sit in power seat. I have seen a lots of people shirk from responsibility as if they need not be responsible.
I have come across a section of people who take responsibilities till the time of achieving their personal goal and totally discontinue to be responsible, thereby putting others into inconvenience.
I use to interact with young people who come to me to get their Resume/Curriculum Vitae prepared. I suggest them to write their STRENGTHS. They are reluctant to add the word I LVOE TO TAKE RESPNSIBILITIES AND MEET THE CHALLENGES. Itis a paradox that they do not know their own strengths or they fear to state that.
Your topic an eye opener that everyone of us should know our responsibility and should be ever willing to take up the responsibility. Thanks.
| |
| |
|
|
 Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Hello again...good to be back in touch. I miss not being here as much and it is always a joy to have some time to share ideas with good on-line friends like you who also offer much to this site.
Yes, I appreciate Gandhi's life and the amazing role model he was to all of us...one of those timeless leaders who truly walked their talk and led by example. I agree with you on your observations that there seems to be a growing tendency within society to NOT take responsibility for words, thoughts, actions and reactions. It seems they would rather play the blame game and make things about everyone else rather than assessing their part in the cause and effect of their choices.
When we lead groups or do life coaching we have also noticed that some people have a really rough time in accepting their worth, strengths and talents. I have quoted Dizzy Dean the old time baseball player here before. He said..."It isn't bragging if you do it!" So yes, there needs to be a healthy balance between what areas we need to improve in...but also take credit for the things that we do well.
Glad you enjoyed the topic...I enjoyed your response. We have another win-win!
Take care,
Raia | |
|
|
| ssh123 (18435) | 10 months ago | Thanks for placing me in a win-win situation.
I was working for an international organization dedicated to development of youth and I was trained to be trainer. I used to participate in the group discussions as a resource person. Whenever an opportunity came to select a leader among themselves, no one would comeforward, fearing this would lead to a lot of work, exhibition of their idiosyncracies, revealing of weaknesses and also may be due to inhibitions.
But then I use to pull someone who is very weak in all aspects, and ask others to give him a chance to be their leader. The appeal appeals and herecomes a leader. He is enthused, he gets the required shot in the arm and he performs like a leader within couple of hours. I found several of them became undisputable leaders in their community and made progress.
So, to make people take responsibility, the encouragement is also required, instead we generally indulge in criticising people that no one wants to take the responsibility.
This is one piece I forgot to add to my previous response. Hope you accommodate it. | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | This is a wonderful addition to the topic and I completely understand your wisdom within the balancing act of developing confidence without creating egotism. I also agree that we do live in what seems to be a pathologically negative society where people do not know how to handle positive feedback and fear taking responsibility.
Having positive role models is the key. We do not have children of our own bug have been involved with the Big Brother/Big Sister organization and have mentored two sets of children from other countries. One from Iraq and the second set of siblings came from Mexico. Being involved with caring adults who are there because they love kids and give their time is very reinforcing to these children who usually come from underprivileged homes with single parents.
So yes, your addition to the discussion shows how your personal and professional experiences have revealed some pertinent perspectives to the subject of responsibility. Thanks for broadening awareness in the unique way you do.
Best regards,
Raia | |
|
|
|
Affordable Group Response Systems Save time and money with proven interactive systems. www.optiontechnologies.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 2. prEttyNbluE (191) | 10 months ago |  thank you for sharing this wonderful point of views. these can surely help a lot of people in mylot. For me, being responsible is remembering what should be done. Like, you cannot say that a person is responsible if he/she keeps on forgetting what should be done (except if he/she is suffering "short-term memory loss" like Dory in Finding Nemo).:-)
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | I appreciate your positive feedback...thanks for that and your contribution here. Yes, I absolutely agree that 'forgetting to remember' things that have been taken on is a great example of irresponsible behavior. We could probably include those who are perpetually late, bit off more than they can chew and then make excuses to boot! (laugh).
I like your lovely beach scene for an Avatar...winter is here where we live and even though it is just starting I am already missing the hot, warm, long and sunny days of summer and the beach. Oh well such is life in Southwestern Manitoba! Makes for a lovely white Christmas so in the end it is all good!
Cheers,
Raia | |
|
|
|
Sales Response Modeling Measuring and optimizing marketing since 1989. Global client list. www.hudsonrivergroup.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 3. inday312saylon (604) | 10 months ago |  Responsibility is such a big thing, especially when a person or an organization has been lodged with great powers. But for me, responsibility is just the proper execution of the various roles that a person plays in life.
When you are an employee, you play your role properly (bound to the ethical norms and standards of society) and when you execute your roles to the best of your abilities, then you are responsible.
In the organization level, the media have social responsibilities too. So do the big multinational corporations and the governments.
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Hi and thanks for you input.
Your comments remind me of the phrase...'to whom much is given...much is expected.' Yes,responsibility is outwardly expressed in as you wisely say..."the ethical norms and standards of society." Very true.
It is true that responsibility or the lack of it has ripple effects that impact on our lives in large and small ways every day.
Best regards,
Raia
| |
|
|
|
Socially Responsible Investing Krull and company provides socially and environmentally responsible investing and planning - helping you align your investments with your values. www.krullandcompany.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 4. ElusiveButterfly (8473) | 10 months ago |  Stepping up to the plate is what I call it. At present time that is what I have had to do. I don't want to go into detail about the situation. Not sure I could put into words what is going on lately. But, someone has to assume responsibility of matters and risk rocking the boat. Guess I am a boat rocker.
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Good for you! I love boat rockers!!! You go girl!! Everyone needs original thinkers and those who see problems and are willing to ask the hard questions in order to get things resolved.
Wishing you every success in your boat rocking ventures...it can be daunting to go through but usually worth it in the end if it creates much needed course corrections for all involved.
My thoughts and well wishes are with you and hope everything resolves itself for your highest good.
Warm and caring regards your on-line gal pal Raia | |
|
|
|
Interactive Voice Response Integravox, LLC specializes in voice response system development for both dialogic-based and intervoice Interactive Voice Response systems. www.integravox.com | add comment |
|
|
|
5.  zigzagbuddha (1239) | 10 months ago |  I don't know if you've noticed or not, but often people associate 'blame' with responsibility.
Actually I don't care for the word. It has such seriousness to the feel of it. Although I do believe that if an individual doesn't take 'responsibility' for their life, then how to they expect to get where they want to go?
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | You have brought up a good point here...and yes I have noticed that. Maybe that is why they play the 'blame game' rather than taking responsibility. ARGH...kind of hurts the head!!! (smile).
Anyway I have reached a point where I don't mind the serious feel to the word responsibility. It used to be right up there with discipline in seriousness...but now I find that living by right principles and having greater discipline and self-responsibility keeps life on track and in balance. Everything is a trade-off...and living this way allows my spirit to feel freer because my life is finally anchored in a lifestyle that doesn't involve the kind of overreach David and I once had.
Anyway, good observation and input thanks for that. Also how is your wayward kitty doing? Hope you both are doing better.
Take care and let me know if you decide to anything with your Blog.
Warm regards,
Raia
| |
|
|
| zigzagbuddha (1239) | 10 months ago | Yep, I played the 'blame game' for most of my life, and my life never got any better. It wasn't until I stopped blaming others and took responsibility for my own condition that I started noticing improvement. I'm still working on it! The tendency to blame rather than take responsibility for my own feelings has been a huge hurdle for me to get over. And that's probably why so many people associate the 2 words... you tend to blame when you're not taking responsibility!
Anyway, I broke down and took my little sweetie pie to the vet when I noticed her tail seemed to be dead. I was afraid it would rot while it was still on her body and create further problems.
The wound on her back was so deep it caused some nerve damage apparently, but the doc said it wasn't necessary to lop it off, so she doesn't look totally like a bob cat!
She stays in the house most of the time and if she goes out at all it's only for a breath of fresh air and to admire the view for a minute and then she's back inside, snoozing on her favorite bed. When she was gone the idea of her never being able to nap on that bed again just broke my heart, and now there she is, just like she ever was, one little kitty contentedly curled up in the middle of that huge king size bed!
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Hi again...
Been busy with work and holiday preparations and haven't been around Mylot Land much...but have a few moments and decided to catch up a little.
Ahh yes...the blame game...and not wanting to make our lives about ourselves and the choices WE are making...been there and done that too! However, I no longer criticize myself for how I used to be...because it is all what led me to the awareness I have now. It is much sweeter to have been there and 'own' the positive changes as they occur. With your attitude now and the approach you are taking to you life I am sure the answers you seek with come.
Thanks for the update on your sweet kitty...glad you have her back. You both are survivors and belong together. Hope you and she enjoy your bond and have many happy, healthy years together.
Warm regards,
Raia | |
|
|
|
Incident Response and Recovery Centers Mobile Command Centers for incident response and disaster recovery. Business continuity services and more. Short and long term leasing, rentals. Sales available on select units. www.exhibitrailers.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 6. lucky_witch (2123) | 10 months ago |  Responsibility to me is to be able to accept and do the best that we can in regards with the things taht we do whether we like it or not. We do something, whether we like it or not, voluntarily or by accident, it doesn't matter... we have a responsibility to perform with that thing. For me, wholeheartedly accepting it, and giving the best for it, is what we call responsibility.
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Interesting perspective and I thank you for offering it. Yes, embracing circumstances and responding---ably is the key to moving through life with dignity and integrity. Not always easy to do...but it often shifts the outcome. So yes, there are many levels to responsibility and you have certainly confirmed that by your input.
Raia | |
|
|
|
C.E.R.T for Emergency Response Team C.E.R.T emergency kits and supplies. Federal government supplier. Low price guarantee. Custom logos avail. Bulk discounts. www.cpr-savers.com | add comment |
|
|
|
7.  okwusman1 (829) | 10 months ago |  responsibility is taking charge for your action. it is for an individual to agree to take the full control of an action be it positively or negatively. the ability is the action while the control is the response, knowing full well that a response could be positive or negative. Though, most people shy away from their responsibilities either because they are incapable in case of job task or ammateur in the case of parental care. which ever way we look at it, every man must take responsibility for any situation or action.
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Hi and thanks for dropping by with your input and observations. I agree with you that it is up to each person to take a self-responsible approach to the situation they are in. Sometimes things appear beyond our control...but our response to them is always within our control. Sometimes taking the higher road and not blaming others can be tough...but when we do it builds a strength of character. At least that has been what I have found both personally and professionally.
Raia | |
|
|
|
Socially Responsible Investing Find investments that are aligned with each client's distinct values. Evaluate the social and financial performance of companies with IWF Advisor. www.idealsworkfinancial.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 8. Aussies2007 (2526) | 10 months ago |  Well... your first responsability is to yourself.
You have to look after yourself in order to survive and stay healthy. If you don't do that... you cannot do anything else. You are a machine which need maintenance. You cannot drill an hole with a broken drill.
Your responsability start at 6 when you enter primary school. You have to learn in order to get an education... so that you can get a job in order to feed yourself.
Besides that... other responsabilities start with the commitments you make.
If you choose to have children... you are making a commitment and you are assuming the full responsability to look after those children until the age of 18... while doing the very best you possibly can to educate them. Their lives depends on you.
Getting a pet is a responsability. I have a cat... and his life depends on me. It does not matter what problem I have... I always think of the cat first. I have made many sacrifices in order to make sure the cat was going to be alright.
If someone gives you a job... you are making the commitment to do the job well. It is your responsability to do so. That person did not had to give you a job. In giving you a job... that person is actually keeping you alive by procuring you with the money for your survival. The least you can do is to take the responsability of giving your employer what he is paying you for.
Like I say... responsabilities start with commitments. The more commitments you make... the more responsabilities you have.
We are not responsible for the planet, the environment, the war in Iraq... etc... Governments are responsible for those. People can do little things to improve things. But no single individual can change the world. Not even a community. It has to be the whole country standing together for one common cause... or better still... if you want to save the planet... it requires the whole world to agree to do so.
We don't have a responsability to other people unless we have made a commitment to do so. In this world... it is pretty much everyone for itself as we struggle to survive.
But one thing is for sure... and I just proved it to myself again as I have just resolved a few of my problems...
If you help yourself and fulfill your responsabilities to others... everything will fall into place and life will be good.
If you don't establish those all important relationships with those people who can help you in time of need... you will fall into the hole of poverty and will never be able to climb out of it on your own.
I devoted my whole life in building those relationships. I don't have many... but the ones I have are solid. And I did it by always fullfilling my responsabilities towards those people.
| |
| |
|
|
|
|
Spill Response ASA, a certified SDB and MBE, specializes in Spill Response, pollution prevention, waste minimization and products and systems for the industrial, construction and marine markets. www.asa-environmental.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 9. whiteheather39 (10045) | 10 months ago |  I am proactive as I try not to let things affect my mood. I am aware that there are some things in my life over which I have no control and if they become intrusive enough to actually interfere with my life or moods. I try to consider it a learning experience, deal with it and then move on.
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | From what you have offered in other discussions I can see how you have developed that way of being. You have overcome much and it sounds as though your proactive approach was learned through some daunting life lessons.
Yes, all things are experiential learning opportunities when viewed that way. Keep on keeping on my friend...you appear to be be able to chart your course and do corrections as needed. Your responses are always appreciated.
Best regards,
Raia | |
|
|
|
Response to Intervention (RtI) START-IN™ is a Response to Intervention (RtI) program for reading by Judy Montgomery and Barbara Moore Brown from Super Duper® publications. www.superduperinc.com | add comment |
|
|
|
| 10. Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago |  ok I saved this from last night to respond.
I wanted to think about it.
and I still am not sure what ya want in responce lol.
Seems like I have always had the ability to respond to alot of things.
and in responding I can very well get myself in trouble with some .
I like the quote from Elenor.
BUt how do you know sometimes if you have gave your consent or not.?
I have noticed on mylot that some peopls use a shock treatment to responces and you are taken back on what they have responded to what you have said and take it a completely different way from what you have said. Very disruppting. For some
and they dont know just how to respond back to that peerson most times it is the negitive side of what the whole post was about. and when that has happened in here it has hurt some of our friends on here and they have left to only come back once in awhile to let us know they are doing ok.
NOw I hope this is what you were lokking for .
I have missed ya being here havent seen ya much since we had our phone chat .
Also I have missed alot of my friends on here that arent posting like they did.
HUgs and blessings
| |
| |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Hello friend...
So you paused and got your 'thinker' going before posting...good to know. In regard to knowing whether you've given consent or not...how I take that is we always have a choice about how things affect us. I have commented often as you have moved through your healing journey how much I respect your choices and...responses to the whole situation...and your honey's passing. I think her quote indicates that people can say and think what they want about us...but we are the ones who make up our minds about what defines us...not them.
I agree with your observations about how people respond to things and often take things the wrong way...but it is still their issue. I have noticed that things are quieter here but it could be the holiday season coming up...or maybe the requests for referrals to other sites are enticing them away. However, I am happy here and view my site here as a responsibility I took on and do not intend to let it go at this point anyway. I miss chatting and sharing ideas when I am not here and that is why I decided to try and post a few more discussion than I have lately. It is such a joy to share ideas with valued friends like you and it is good to be chatting again.
I received your last e-mail about being caught up for a few days and was waiting to have a little more news to share before calling or e-mailing. I miss you too Lakota...but the bond we have built is strong and I trust it will continue because David and I value your presence in our lives.
So many blessings to you and yours and another biggie hug...still gentle of course!
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | yup every one does come down to have to make there own choices . and how they respond to each other makes alot of difference I just hope that some of those differences dont hurt any one.
Glad ya go tmy email. adn am like you need more to happen before saying anything for in an hour talikng we go alot of places lol Glad to have you 2 in my life to hugs and blessings | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | You strike me as a person who is very willing to assume responsibility for the direction you want to take your life. I admire and respect you immensely Lakota and David and I are both grateful that we've become friends too! So we have a real win-win dynamic going on.
As always my thoughts, prayers and well wishes are with you...the candle continues to be part of my daily ritual as I send warm, loving wishes and energetic support your way.
Hugs, love and light,
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | yup I have to no one else will here lol. am so glad to have met you 2 and my feathers are working great.
I did think maybe bandages would come off today but no such luck as I still have a small amout of drainage.
Oh well maybe next week huh?
then If nurse releases me so does the therapist and then I will have to go to out patients to finish theapy
| |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | opps hit the button to soon HUgs and blessings to you both! | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Good to hear that your healing is coming so close to completion. Keep taking your supplements..and all will be well I am sure.
Glad you like the feathers...from one medicine woman with power to another medicine woman with LOTS of power. Love you my friend...
Signing off now..chat soon!
Love and hugs
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | awww thanks.
after being so sick yesterday I took the feathers down and passsed them over the wounds and me and brushed my face with them all the whihle telling them this was to be a healing procces and that seemed to work real well . I thank you again for them. and Chey likes the feel of them on her face for she said me too gandmaw lol | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Oh Lakota thanks so much for giving me that update about the feathers. They came to you with much energetic support and it is a joy to me to know that they are adding good things to you life and that of your sweet grandchild. Within the wings...there are prayers and energetic support and I knew you'd be sensitive enough to pick that up.
May they continue to be a blessing to you...as I have said they are my way of honoring the medicine woman in you...a powerful, knowing person with much to offer this world!
Light filled blessings and much love,
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | you are welcome hugs
and I just love my feathers.and I now have them in my bed room but need to get them with me for I feel that I am not getting the benifit from them where they are . I get such a tighteing in my chest before I take a pain pill that it is a very bad feeling and I think it is because I have moved the feathers does that sound corny I dont think so for I feel like they have a pwoer of thier own that was helping me in here.
Nurse said today that she is hoping to get me released by MOnday wounds are down to pin hiole yeah!!!.
awwwwwwww ya done it again do ya see the red lol.
HUgs and blessings | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | Knowing how much you are enjoying your feathers is a gift back to me. Thank you for your willingness to share that...it is an honor to both of us. The mutual respect and attitude of gratitude we share makes our energetic resonance stronger. When you tell me things that you pick up on around the feather confirms how much power you have and I knew that from day one.
I say what I do to you from my heart...no flattery...I would not dishonor our bond by ever doing that!
So enjoy them and I am grateful to know they are helping you heal...it was my intent when I offered them to you. Love you...and treasure what we have.
I am signing off now but will chat again tomorrow.
Love, light and hugs,
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | I do so much treasure what we have and hope to keep it up!.
and you know me I dont take compliments well the seem to make me turn red lol
yes I know they are helpingas I touch them and sometimes pass them over the wound area and the muscle area to make them get streched int o place gain hugs and blessing! | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | It is my sincere hope that they continue to help you heal and regain full strength. The love, light and energetic support David and I send you daily continues and I have never failed to light a candle of every day. When I do I focus on your surgery and envision it filled with purple and gold light...and trust you and your body will know what is the best way to utilize it. Very honoring and respectful of you...and your own great Intuitive Knowing.
Talk soon...luv ya!
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | Oh I know they weill and your continued lighting of the candles and your energies are also helping me I do feel like I am gaining progress on this thing and maybe surprize every one and be well alot sooner than we think!
thanks and hugs and blessings thru the next year to you both | |
|
|
| Perspectives (2201) | 10 months ago | It is a Christmas present to hear that. Exchanges and gifts come in many forms...knowing that our bond in combination with your own self-determination, openness, positivity and trust is something I will be celebrating this season as well. I value you and your presence in our lives and knowing your healing is progressing so well is something I count among my 'attitudes of gratitude' as well.
So keep up the good work and I look forward to more good reports!
Light filled blessings and lots of hugs and love,
Raia | |
|
|
| Lakota12 (10729) | 10 months ago | good to celebrate new friends at this time and thanks hugs and blessing to you both | |
|
|
|