Hurt people...hurt people

Most Children that have problems in School, are from an abuse families. Even Adult too come from abused families. It is a know fact.

We do not have a big solution, just the small one of not hurting others. Hurt comes as a child, hurt comes as a teen or hurt comes as an adult. Remember, remember what the harsh words or even the careless words felt like. I am 54 and can remember being belittled and put down forty seven years ago. I have to remember that so that I am kinder to students I work with. To be honest, I still could be kinder than I am. I think it depends on the atmosphere I work in. I think if I am working with kind people, I am kinder too. We need to help each other be our best. Good post Raydene

I believe this too sweetheart and I also believe if you bring your children up with hugs and kisses and tell them often that you love them that they will do the same with their children , I know my two elder sons do , If we all did this it would be a better world to live in xxx

I will agree to this as not everyone comes away from Abuse with the will to never put another Person through things like that Some do but not many xxx

I agree that many people hurt as children do harm others, but not all cases do go on to be abusers. There is help available to change your life and to not repeat the pattern. Children shouldn't blame themselves for the abuse and do need to get help. Sadly, I keep reading cases where the parents did everything right yet the child hurts somebody else. We have all read where the straight "A" student just snaps and kills somebody and nobody was aware that the child needed help. Parents need to hug their children and be available to listen. I see to many people in my area spend no quality time with their children these days. People shouldn't have children, if they don't plan to spend time together. I knew of one case where both parents worked, then went out to dinner without their child. They told the courts that they needed time together. The court did take away the child from the home. It was sad to know this teenager, as none of the family wanted him to live with them. I was glad he found a good foster home that was able to give him a good home.

That is so true Mom, many children who have been abused go on to become abusers - that is a proven fact. Whilst my heart goes out to anyone who has suffered and been hurt in this way I believe that they have a choice whether to go on and hurt others - many make a conscious decision never to treat another human being the way that they have been treated! I wish we could stop all abuse right here , right now! xxx

That is so true in some cases. That is why it is so important to stop the cycle of abuse. People who do abuse and hurt others have more then likely been hurt and abused when they were young. Bullies have usually been bullied when they were young. This is not to say that if you have been hurt that you will hurt others or abuse them. We all have the power to stop the cycle of abuse. Awareness is a good start, we need to help people break the cycle of abuse. Teach kids that they have to speak up if they are being abused. Some kids grow up and think its normal, they don't say anything, they are afraid. We have to provide protection to those that do speak up. There are so many women and men too, that are afraid to speak up and are being abused. We read in the paper all the time how a spouse or boyfriend killed their partner. It has too and needs to stop. No one should have to live in fear.

yes that is true, just look at your own life and the people you know. if somebody is angry they usually get angry at people around them people that have anything to do with what happened to them, they get snappy or argumentive or worse,

True.We are all products of our upbringing and creatures of our circumstances. In fact,I have read that research reports have revealed the effect of love and affection on young kids.When children are cuddled and cherished this causes some positive chemical reaction n the brain and the child apparently performs very well. So, as a corollarry I guess people who are hurt are likely to be negative in their approach and hurt others. It should take a lot of training and change of circumstances to get another type of positive behaviour.

Hi Raydene, It is quite disheartening to see so many children being abused by their parents. These parents should forget about bearing any children. So many parents nowadays are so absorbed with their works and problems that they forgot to pay attention to their children. You can see rich kids doing bad things because their parents are nowhere. I agree that awareness and unconditional love should be properly observed. This way, we may be seeing more children wearing a big smile on their faces. :)

I love that saying! Maybe that wasn't the best way to put it because obviously I hate that people are hurt to begin with but that statement makes such perfect sense in the way that only Cosby could come up with. Here's something that just happened here; a friend of my grandkids, actually she's my grandson's former "girlfriend" (they're only 13...lol) and a friend of my granddaughter has had some problems at home that my whole family has been aware of for some time but we all like this girl a lot. Ashley's very polite and well-behaved, she seems to be quite intelligent and she's a beautiful girl. Her parents are divorced and her mother, with whom she lives, spends nearly every night at bars until morning and is known to either spend the night with different guys or bring them home with her. Ashley is alternately ignored and left to fend for herself and abused, both physically and emotionally. On Friday night my husband was with the kids at the local roller rink and Ashley was there too. Someone showed up there and wanted to see her so she took her skates off and went outside and was gone for quite awhile. When she finally came back in she was crying hysterically and no one could understand much of what she was saying. Finally she blurted out that her aunt who was in the Marines, had a year old baby and had just gotten married two weeks ago had been killed in Iraq by a roadside bomb. Needless to say, word of this spread throughout the skating rink and one of the owners made an announcement to the crowd about this tragic event. Everyone was trying to do anything they could to make her feel better so she ended up going home with my granddaughter, Angela, to spend the night along with another close friend. The only problem is, this story wasn't true. Her father - who doesn't have permanent custody - came to my daughter's house early yesterday afternoon and took her home and later called to have a talk with my daughter and son-in-law. It seems Ashley is very troubled and her father, who really does seem to be a good guy and a very responsible parent, doesn't know what to do right now. My point is, I know she was very wrong to make up such a story but I can't dislike her or even feel too angry with her because the poor child has been hurt, probably her whole life, and now she is hurting others by her behavior. What you say here is so true! Children who are hurt will hurt others! I hope this is one child that can be helped before it's too late because she has so much potential if only someone hears her obvious cries for help. Annie

The ability to be aware of what we are doing is the key to knowing ourselves. I do believe that people who are hurt hurt people. I feel that being revengeful is one nature in all human beings. I have been hurt before and as the hurt hurts, I 'resolved' to hurt someone in turn. It was glad I was brought to awareness "Emotions can kill and that we consistently need to be be aware of our thoughts" that I was able to spare those whom I intended to hurt.

Hello raydene :). I agree awareness is indeed a way to understanding and helping therefore possibly preventing the spread of hurt all around us. This is something to think about. Thanks for this piece of information. I am in need of solutions and you have just provided me with one - HURT people HURT ... so much to understand in those 3 words. You have a lovely day and thank you so much.

I believe that could be true. Most angry feelings stem from hurt feelings. Get beyond someones anger and you will almost always find a person that is really hurting. I don't get angry easily but I do know that times that I have felt that way are usually rooted in someone hurting my feelings or some misunderstanding. Communication and awareness on both sides is a great start.