Do you blame other people's children for your children's bad behavior?

I've seen a lot of parents like that (being a kindergarten teacher, I see lots of parents blaming other kids for their child's behaviour). I don't do it with my kids and they get punished for behaviour no matter where they picked it up from. Rule No.1...the behaviour is bad and I don't care who did it...I don't want my children repeating it...and if they do, they have to bear with the consequences...and I teach them to make the right choices and not to blindly follow their friends. I'm not saying my kids are angels and always do the right thing...they don't....but my son's learnt the hard way that repeating something his friend did isn't the right way to go about doing things.

I will admit i am bad for this - however - my daughter only associates with her cousins who have recently moved near us & they haven't got anyone else to get it from. My nieces will scream for the sake of screaming - now my daughter does it, they came to my house & jumped from couch to couch - now my daughter does it - littler things like that but they're enough to get on your nerves. The couch thing i play on having my daughter out of very quickly so she cant be responsible for teaching it to anything else but i think it also depends on the other parents too - whether or not they actually STOP their kids from doing the things they do. There wouldn't be any picking up of things if the original parent had put a stop to it right away to begin with :) I know my nieces didn't pick it up from anyone else as they are only ever home with their Mum - so no daycare or anything, which means it cant have come from anyone else. I agree that you cant blame everything on other people's kids & that those other kids got it from somewhere else - but there are still certain things that your child will pick up - that will have started with the person they saw do it. Anyway, i do know what you're saying & i do agree but in some instances (like the few i have here) there isn't always a string of people that have done it.

as parents we will blame anyone but ourselves. The nearer the accusations come to us the further we try to push them away. We must also recognise that bad beaivour rarely starts with children, but rather parents. blessed be

I tried really hard to teach my children that every one of their behaviors is a choice they make. And in making that choice they are also choosing the natural and logical consequences of that choice. You can choose to do what others do or you can choose to do what you think is right for you. You know what your parents want you to do and you can choose to do what they want or not. But your choice comes with consequences. Kids often come home from school with language you don't want them to use. You can point out to them the consequences of using that language and make sure those consequences are consistently applied. Then it isn't anyone else's "fault" when they choose "bad" behavior. If a child picks up a bad habit from my child that probably means my child didn't have any unpleasant consequences from that behavior . . . which would be my responsibility.

Hi there Susan! I rarely do that. Exceptions are when my son was provoked and was physically hurt. But basically, I think that we should build our children with strong foundation that they can always stand their ground even if they see that the other children are doing the opposite.

Good day. I didn't see the logic on why some parents would blame other people's children for the bad habit their kid picked up. I mean if it was picked up, it wouldn't matter where he pick it up from because surely there will be a lot of it where it comes from but what they should rather do is teach their children about what good habit to pick and train them to sway away from the bad ons.

when my son was little I never really had that kind of problem much but I have seen parents who' fight with all the other parents over thier own kids who they said picked up bad behavior from the the other's kids. I just let things go myself as long as the behavior was not all that bad.

No i do not! Althgough i know that children can be influenced by their peers, i dont blame others for what my kids do. I try to teach my kids about good and bad choices, and hope that they make the right ones. I can't stand parents that think that every bad thing their kids do are influenced by another kid, and thus put the blame solely on the other child that's not fair in my opinion. There is such a thing as free choice, and not because everyone else is doing it means it's right, is what i tell my kids when they try to explain some stupid thing that they did.

As you know when my children do something they should not do THEY are responsible for Their actions i don't give a tinkers spit who they picked it up from (their parents can deal with them as they feel necessary). As for blaming other children for what mine does , all i can say is our prisons are full of adults that were never held responsible for their own actions and i had rather mine not join them when they are grown! Yes, this may sound harsh but better to learn now than let the court system teach them later. And i know you are the same way with your children. If we didn't love them we wouldn't care enough to bother with the aggravation of teaching them responsible behavior.

Not if you teach your children to think and act as individuals.Granted they may be influenced by their friends but this is where they must learn to think for themselevs and take responsibility for their actions.I think people who do that are in denial that their children can do bad things and that is setting a bad precedence for their children who will never accept responsibility for their actions