Do you ever wish you'd made better choices for your life?

That's phenomenal! I had no idea. As for me, I'm going to be an old, very old grandma by the time my baby girl gets into college or starts her own family. I feel so aged! I hope I'm around for my great grandchildren.

Wow! It is so phenomenal that you can map out your history in such a definite way. Many people act as if their past is all hazy as if they had no input into the whole situation and landed smack dab in the middle of their current present day life! Owning up to life, is the best way to go. As you say, would you have been the same person. And I can't answer that. I wonder the same about myself and my past history. I used to be a very open and trusting person in my real life. Very naive. My heart got broken one too many times by close best friends and then I just shut down. It has taken years to be able to open up my heart again! I think it all started up for me again when I gave birth to my daughter. The minute I looked in her eyes for the first time my heart was healed! On this planet, she is all I need now! She's just the best, most genuine person I've ever met. And yes, smart! Girls are always so super smart. She's a survivor. I'm blessed enormously for having her in my life. Just so lucky I was picked to be her Mom.

I didn't have a say in the abuse I received as a child, but I had the choice to avoid it as an adult. Partly because of the former, I opted into it because I thought it would get better. I was wrong. But, without it, would I have been able to rise above that part of me that didn't know better? Probably not. And, I know just what you mean about your daughter. Mine was the most phenomenal thing - the experience of having her was so entirely different than with my son. His heart stopped before he was born, the doctor hadn't realized the amount of fetal distress taking place, and I didn't have a clue about anything going on around me. By the time my daughter came along, I was more mature, afraid to hope for a girl (my son had quite a few behavioral problems possibly linked to his birth problems), but hoping nonetheless, and when they laid her on me, that little thing lifted her head and looked me in the eyes when I called her name. I broke down and cried. I had a bonding experience at that moment that I wished I'd also had with my son. That doesn't mean I love one more than the other, but the relationship is definitely different. She's 22 now and the bright star on my horizon. Here's her photo. She took it of herself in my mother's bathroom.

I meant about the student loans and credit cards. I made the same mistake and got in debt. I have owned up to it, though and it's made my life better knowing that I'm smarter now and will never do the same thing with my finances. I feel like I had to go through that before I could really grow up and mature, though. Otherwise, I'd still be thinking money grew on trees and would just appear out of nowhere. I wouldn't trade my credit card nightmare for anything cause it made me grow up. With that being said. I wouldn't wish it on anyone else! Your daughter is lovely. I hope that my daughter grows up with such amazing self confidence. I can relate to your birthing experience. With my daughter, I was not able to hold her upon her birth. I was on the spinal block so they could do the C-section and could feel nothing below my neck. She was under stress and had a fever as did I and we had to have an emergency C-section. She was out in no time, lucky they had monitored me for such a possibility. I was so blessed that nothing major was wrong with her. But she had the most amazing eyes. They held her up by my face so I could kiss her face and talk to her. She looked at me with one eye open and one eye closed as if she were still asleep. And she had the most piercing blue eyes, like indigo ink. I kissed her face and cried. And then kissed her face and cried some more. I had thought that I was the only one who cried at their child's birth. They were such happy tears. I felt as if I'd been released from the shackles of my past. I'm a much stronger person since her birth. A part of me woke up that I never knew existed. I'm a big bad mama bear now. Before I was meek and accepting of what life threw at me. Now, I don't simply accept what life has to offer. I shape things to the way I want them to be, for her sake! Being a mom has made me the person I should have always been!

You were destined to meet and have your beautiful son!

And being on the trip with someone you really care about is going to make things even more fun.

It's never too late! Life has not passed you by, no matter how late it seems!

No my dear friend now its too late

Money is often the great divider of friends and family! I know that all too well!

My best wishes for you, Hatley! No one should suffer! Please rest and be well! Beauty Queen

You're still young! Trust me. You can still make up for anything you didn't do. It's not too late. There are all kinds of options for you now. Student loans, grants, gov help to go to trade school or college. You just need the strength to take the help to go on. Your life is just beginning.

If only it were that easy. Along with wishing I would have done things differently, I wish I could be a completely different from what I am now. I battle a social phobia, which doesn't help anything at all. I worry, probably more than someone my age should. I pretty much wish everything about me/my life was different, lol.