I need opinions about a strange hobby my friend has.

getnbuy - I know it sounds like OCD, but it's not something he needs medicine for. He's not miserable, and he doesn't see it as a waste of time. He's not hurting anything. I feel compassion for him, but I'm not trying to "fix" him.

He's quirky.

I can speak for myself but alot of people loved my charasmatic Bipolar self and then it just progressively got worse until I did finally admit I needed medication and I never thought of it as a "fix" but something I would need to live a fairly productive life--I had racing thoughts where I could not even keep up with one thing to the next and it made it hard to get anything done! I am so thankful I did it even though I had so many bad experiences with anti-depressants which, folks, is a common misdiagnoses for those like us and I was close to giving up on meds completely, It took it getting pretty bad, think Brittany Spears bad to get to the meds.
I have slight OCD where I always have to have things in a certain order and cannot pass a chair that needs to be pushed in and not push it, things like that (hey, right in the ranks with Robert Deniro, yes!)

I meant to say it sounds like hoarding to me and I have a very close friend who does this too except with food but its like its as normal as ever to her and she just lives like that unfortunately with her children. She used to be very compulsive about writing things down (a habit I seemed to pick up) in notebook after notebook but they were just random notes or numbers that had no order. This has only gotten worse and I am so thankful this has never went exposed as she would certainly lost her kids, I have cleaned her house top to bottom several times and it never works. She comes from a conservative background and her husband is a former pastor and would not even allow medication for her which is a same because I admire her so much because I see her gifts and she doesnt even know it.

I know, I know. It seems so obvious that it doesn't make sense. But he keeps doing it and it's not a waste of time for him.

I was hoping someone here had a different "off the wall" theory.

Aha... anwar, does your friend 'process' things differently, ie do you think it might be a behavioral or social type of condition? This isn't to say there's anything technically wrong with him, just that he might need the stimulation that this odd habit gives him and he can't seem to get the same thing in a normal manner like other people do. Just a thought.

It could be creating a sense of order and security for him since its so regular in his life this hobby, you know.

That makes perfect sense to me and you, but not to him. He doesn't know I'm asking anyone what they think. It fascinates me.

Even though he gets frustrated, I know I get frustrated on mylot sometimes, like when I make a bunch of typo's, but that doesn't mean I don't like it.

Oh well. thanks for the sensible input.

Well, good thoughts all. He does see a counselor and yes, part of it is a degree of OCD. But OCD is only a problem if it affects your life in a negative manner.

I thought you had it there for a minute. I think maybe he records, not because he is afraid not to have cable, but because no one else is taking care to see these shows are recorded.

He's okay when he's visiting someone. He spends some months with different family members and he doesn't tape while he's away.

But as soon as he's home. He's retired, maybe it passes the time for him.

thanks for your thoughts. I never really thought about helping him overcome this, I know he won't stop. I'm trying to figure out how his brain works.

But, that's me. Always thinking.

no problem

Good suggestion - I think that's where the answer is.

The level of recording he does requires a lot of thinking and planning. Since he retired, I think he misses that daily high we get from the outside world,

His hobby keeps his mind sharp and his brain busy.

I expressed my thoughts when he asked me, or I asked him, and I think he agrees with me. So, your idea is a valid one. Do you think my theory makes sense?

Thanks for not jumping down "his" neck as if something is wrong with him. I understand that it sounds really weird to some people, but other people, such as yourself, have a deeper intuitive mind, and I thank you for that.

The other thing that crossed my mind is, I wonder if someone can think of a use for all these tapes? Maybe he can donate them to a retirement home of something?

Donating the tapes or making them available to people who may be able to get some use out of them would be a wonderful idea! Retirement homes or even shelters for people who are homeless or have been abandoned and/or abused maybe. They need some entertainment too, and movies and tv are a pretty 'safe' form of entertainment.

It occurred to me too after reading that your friend is retired that he might be trying to add a little bit of mental/visual stimulation back into his life. Retirement is not a bed of roses for everybody, while some people gloriously jump right into it, others drag their feet as much as possible! It can be a scary prospect for somebody who has worked constantly for 50 years or longer to suddenly be without that daily routine, that expectation from other people, being counted on, being 'useful', providing a service to others as well as earning a paycheck to enjoy.

mommyboo - Thank you. Your comments are astute and I agree with you. I came to the same conclusion, but I kept wondering what he would do with all of them?

Maybe he has a secret plan, but I like your idea.

Hi sister. I know it's likely to be OCD and so does he. But there are degrees to this disorder and since it doesn't affect anyone in a negative manner, I'm not worried.

He sees a therapist on a regular basis, so it's not a problem.

Thanks for your compassion. I know this friend very well, so maybe his habit doesn't seem as weird to me compared to what people who don't know him think.

Now, I'm asking, since he's aware he has a strange habit, but wants to continue, can anyone think of something to do with all the tapes he is making?

Some of the movies he records are unusual or old and maybe somehow, somewhere, someone will have a need or use for all those recordings.

Maybe that's the better question, now that mylotters have helped me think this through.
Thanks!

Yes, most everyone has suggested OCD, and yes, more than likely, this is a harmless form of that disorder.

It's interesting you mention going to school. He's retired now, but he went through some intensive college courses. The skills he learned there, organization, methodical evaluation and more, required discipline and deep analytical thinking.

Maybe the skills got so reinforced, the need to use them never left his mind. Does that make sense? Because by talking to you, I came up with that idea. Your thoughts touched off new ones for me.

That's what I was hoping for. thanks.

You mention He's retired? From doing what?

You're funny. No, he doesn't watch them, only while he records them. He has an extra bedroom where he stores all the tapes.

Yes, we all agree OCD in some form. Maybe I should have mentioned that from the beginning.
It's so funny, because I ask him, "don't you know no one watches VHS anymore?"

"Yup" he says, "I know."

I think he lost his way when he retired. He drove truck for twenty-eight years, but was forced to leave because his Union went on strike. Two more years would have given him "thirty and out." The shock of losing his job stunned him.

Yes, he gets out with friends, mostly me and he doesn't stay stuck at home 24/7 with no break at all.

Maybe he's one of those quirky people who enjoys something no one else understands.

I try to get him interested in the internet, but no, likes to listen to public radio for unbiased news and he's very intelligent and well informed.

Does He ever talk about why He does this? Everybody gets OCD moments..You're At the door on the way out,and go back into the house to check you didn't leave a tap running,forget your house keys,check the back door's locked,if the gas is on,check your pockets or bag for your money,car keys,etc..I haven't studied OCD,but I'm interested in how the "block" occurs that they can't seem to get past and get on with their life..it's like a broken record..Did He have a habit of recording programmes on TV to watch when He got back from a Delivery run? Was He a long distance trucker?

No, he never had time for TV when he was working. He drove tractor trailer, but not over the road. I think he has to want to stop if he's going to stop. It is an interesting thought process though. I lost track of where I mentioned his college years.

Oh, he's okay. Everybody agrees OCD to some degree. He doesn't need a psychiatrist, only the most severe cases require medical intervention.

He has a psychologist that he sees every week.

It is kind of outrageous behaviour, isn't it? The more I think about it, the funnier it sounds. If that's all this world had to worry about, we'd be in good shape.

Nice to hear from you again.

I am always intrigued somewhat by people who are quirky and enjoy it, life needs folks like that. I have my own quirks and I actually enjoy them, and it's much better to see others who do too. Conformists scare me

mommyboo - it's easy to lose your comments because I don't think to look under my comments being commented on. Oh, that's a hard one to explain. I'll pay attention now.

More good thoughts. Thanks. You did add much to this discussion. I appreciate every word.

mommyboo - more comments for you

I like my quirks too. Conformists can be so conforming and expect everyone else to do the same!

Oh, the wise dragon speaks again. I told him about VCRs being obsolete. I think if he had more tech savvy, or he started recording with DVD, he would be using DVD now. He asks me about it recording with digital, but he figures since he started with VHS, he'll keep on going with it.

He does feel a slight responsibility to record movies people may never get to see. Maybe he thinks there will be a need for them, but he doesn't want to talk about it because he feels strange.

Could be, could be.

Thanks for not mentioning OCD. I'm getting tired of telling everyone "I know, I know."