4 yr old that wont potty in the toilet

Children need to be potty trained as early as 2 years old. I think what you need to do is to take him out of the diapers and time his pee. encourage him to pee every 2 hours or more .

Have you tried putting him on a schedule? Take him to the bathroom every 2 hours during the day. It may be that he doesn't recognize the feeling of having to go to the bathroom yet. When we trained our boys and girls, this is what we did.

We also had one child who would still pee her diaper, and when we found she was wet, we would put her on the potty and have her stay there until she did go. I always thought it was a bit harsh, but it worked.

This is something that can be a struggle to deal with. I have a five year old son myself and he was not fully potty trained until about the age of four himself. Every child has their time frame. I do agree that it is probably a little more difficult to train a boy.
I think when a boy is ready he will know and the parents will know. If there is really any concern maybe a doctor could intervene. Some of the ideas that have been implemented by the parents here that you speak seem like good theories to use. Sometimes the child could feel pushed and that could cause a child to not want to cooperate.
Believe me. If my son can do it anyone can! I thought I would never get him figured out when it came to the toilet training. He is now doing good and sometimes he has an accident during the night but we have him wear pull ups. Accidents are going to be a part of life.

I don't really think taking stuff away from a child for not using the potty is very wise emotionally. It makes them feel as if they have done something very horribly wrong. I recently saw an episode of Nanny 911. She says to succesfully potty train you need to make it fun . She has a song and dance to encourage children to potty train . It goes something like this, evrytime the child uses the potty do a little song and dance . Act crazy......... Sally just used the big potty, sally just used the big potty,,,,,,,,,,yay yay, Sally used the big potty . She says even the adults should do this using their name like "Mommy just used the big potty, etc etc . every time they use the bathroom also . This makes it a game for the child, and we all know children love to play games . Try it, see if it works ...........good luck. And when she does use the big potty let everyone know, chilren respond very well to Praise. This also may be something mom wants to discuss with her pediatrician, just to make sure there is nothing medically wrong .....


Cheryl

Sometimes the pull ups are a security/comfort thing
they have trained themselves to potty in those and dont realy make the connection between having the got to go feeling with the toilet because of it
try switching to underwear with some rubber pants
wetting those is a different and less than comforting feeling
also since its a boy you can try making going potty a little more fun
are you using a potty chair or using the big toilet?
if you are using a potty chair it would be better for these suggestions
my oldest boy - I put aluminum foil or wax paper in the potty chamber so that when he peed on it it would make a different sound he liked that and you can try different types of liners for different tones
my youngest boy - he was real into army men so we came up with a game called defeat the enemy
we put cheerios or fruit loops in the potty chamber and the objective was to "shoot" them all

schedules do help, every 2 hours is good
but if he goes in and doesnt pee after 5-10 minutes let him up and then bring him back 5 minutes latter
do this until he pees in the potty
good luck!

He is being lazy. At 4 yrs old he should have been trained already. I have to say, my first son was trained at 18 months. My second son was harder. He would go under the table and go in his pants. I finally just told him, if you dont go in the toilet, you won't have a birthday party. That is all that I had to do and he was trained.
I watch a 2 1/2 yr old who won't even go near the toilet. I blame it on the parents as they don't want to start training him. I am all ready to start, but they have to do it at home too.
Sounds like at least the mom is concerned about this too.
I have used bribery, taking things away too. It depends on the child what works.
Maybe you can make him a chart to earn the tv. When he comes in on a fresh, new day you can show him the chart. when he goes dry for one whole day, he can have the tv the next day. Then if he wets, he has to go dry for 2 days before he gets the tv again. If he goes dry for a week, give him a special prize.

I have started to take the diapers/pullups away every day for a few hours in the morning, and i keep asking do you have to go pee? do you have to go pee? every 20 mins or so. i keep her in the kitchen where there is no carpet in case of an accident. . we colour/have a picnic/do puzzles/crafts. . now she can pee a little bit in the potty every 20 mins or so, i guess she can hold it, but if i have her in the highchair, or dont ask her to potty before she needs to go, she will do it in her underwear. . and she wILL NOT poop in the potty.

Have you tried getting him to do target training with cheerio's in the toilet? lol that do esn't work for girls.. but it may for him for peeing

I know this is hard I have a 2 year old that I am trying to potty train as well as an 18 month old, all these people telling you that he should have been potty trained need to lay off these things take timand if you push the child there not gonna do it all you are gonna do is scare them even more. mY 2 year old was doing great and then we sent him to his grandmothers house and when he came back he refused to go to the bathroom besides in his diaper they were not making him use the potty up there with them. One thing that I have learned is that you have to be persistent with this. I've tried everything that you have butnot the cheerios my kids would rather eat them than pee in them and I don't want to take the chance of them doing that. My advice is just keep trying and I've had a lot of luck with putting them in the corner or the time out chair when they go in there pants or under the table or wherever they decide to go so try that and good luck I know what your going through

You're right about boys being harder than girls when it comes to potty training that's forsure but this is a sign of abuse to allow a four year old to wet themselves. Unless the kid is mentally disabled... I think the mother needs more disaplining skills and figure out who's in control.. the child or her. That's not fair for you either because he's not your child and you pretty much have to obey what the mother wants. I would sit down with her and figure out a way to stop this child from this nasty habit. Make out a reward chart and use stickers if you need to and if he's good with it all week then he should earn a prize. Persistance is the key and no matter what, keep trying.

This is your problem not his. (I helped raise 4 boys). He likes the attention he's getting by filling his pants. First thing..... get rid of those pullup diapers. Explain to him, that hes too old to wear babies diapers. Get a nice little pair of training pants with tight legs (to keep his job in) Then explain to him that he is toilet trained, and he can go by himself when he has to. Then sit back and see what happens. When he fills his pants let him sit in it. He will hate the cold feeling, and the smell will be awful. When he cries tell him to go into the bathroom and clean himself up. (you can help) then put another pair of training pants on him. this little boy knows whats going on. He's enjoying the whole thing now. He will soon find out its not any fun when nobody gets excited about it