which hurts the most the TRUTH or the LIE?

It may hurt, but we can learn to live with the truth. Usually, I would rather leave the liar than to have to live with his lies.

I preffer the truth even if it hurt, I would not like to be friends with some one who lies I have had several experiences when I have being lied to and is not a good feeling.

Well I would like to be told the truth rather than the lie,even when the truth is reaaly painful.I just want to know the truth no matter what it is and hate to be cheated.

It's better to tell the truth because if you lie, you will be in a lot worse trouble if the truth is found out. I don't think we're always completely truthful, though. For example, if I say I'm going to do something and then don't do it, it's probably because I forgot. I do know that if somebody lies to me intentionally and I find out the truth later, then I'm really upset. I would much rather be hurt from the truth than to be lied to and hurt worse later. Kathy.

actually the TRUTH is always more painful than a lie, that is why some people live a lie. For me, I think I just accept anything that comes. Sometimes we just have to be optimistic about things and not be discouraged too much. Whether its the TRUTH or LIE doesn't matter too much if we do not focus too much on it.

actually the TRUTH is always more painful than a lie, that is why some people live a lie. For me, I think I just accept anything that comes. Sometimes we just have to be optimistic about things and not be discouraged too much. Whether its the TRUTH or LIE doesn't matter too much if we do not focus too much on it.

Hi HelScream! Nice to meet you! Excellent topic!
...and not so easy to answer either.

If a white lie stops needless hurt I think I don't mind that.

example.. If a neighbour says to me that her garden looks awful and disorganized.. I know my neighbour and I know she needs encouragement, and then I will say something like.. "now Marie, why do you say that? You have it so lovely! You work hard here and on your job and with your kids! Your garden has come along so fine! What don't you like about your garden then?"

I get from her a 'hum and a haw' perhaps and that she got to it so late and nothing is quite done and she needs colour just in that corner..

We fix it.. I dig up something she likes and she plants it in the corner and I thank her for giving that extra plant a new home!

Yes it was a white lie! Yes the garden is looking not so good YET,BUT NOT at all bad either!! but SHE feels better because I encouraged her and she has a new boost of encouragement and confidence and enjoys trying to fix it all now..

It wont be the last white lie but it certainly wont be the last time I give encouragement and help either, instead of being brutally honest for no helpful reason.

Other lies!!.. I try to understand WHY the person lied.. if it is from fear of painful repercussions, then I try to get around it to get to the truth carefully. I have students who no longer bother to lie because they trust me to work it out with them if they wish it. I try to stay objective even if it is terribly hard sometimes. I give advice as well and they trust me to care.

BUT.. the truth! The truth can be sooo bitter. There was a time with 'reality orientation'.. a method to deal with people who had a form of dementia and they would be coaxed back to reality instead.. THAT was painful. Imagine telling a lady several times a day that 'NO NO, your husband is DEAD!!' every time she asks what time her husband will be home for supper and then seeing the shock and disbelief in her face and seeing and hearing the painful sobs....each and every time she said the same thing again.

The truth should be told when necessary, but we must be careful to be honest and gentle and kind.
If my wife would have an affair with another man, I would not want a lie, but rather the truth! because our relationship was built on love and trust and damaging that with lies can be very crippling to a relationship.

Like you said,, better to keep silent than to tell a lie.. I agree with you that it is a good policy in many cases.. but to spare the vulnerability in people I make judgement calls..I can be kind or brutal.. I have that choice depending on the circumstance.

In details pertaining to law.. the truth is important to me that it is all the truth and out in the open so appropriate action is taken.


Thankyou.. you made me think!!

I agree with you on this. one. When someone lies they break that trust you had in them. Sometimes never to be repaired again. I can not tolerate a liar.

Both hurt but the pain from a lie lingers and eats you up inside. It also breaks trust and that is the worst. Tell me the truth, I will learn to deal with it and/or learn from it. Lies do nothing good.

If anyone say he or she don't tell lie that person is a great lair. To tell lie is not good.But if a lie save one person then why should I not tell lie.I think we can tell harmless lie.