How much is too much?  

I would not have taken out the loan. I'm not a parent, so I can just go on what I think I would do. And I don't think taking out a loan, going into debt is as good as an example for her daugher as if she had her daughter learn to make due with what she has. She could still play on a team, like you said, the local one. And she could use this as motivation for her daughter. You know, that she could make that team better than the other one, that she could be a "big fish" in that pond.

I think that if you can afford to pay the price, then encourage your niece or your sister to go for it. But if your sister cannot afford to pay the price, it would be good to start in an affordable local team. On the other hand, being in a good team entails a price to pay. A lot of those elite and successful players develop themselves to be the best because they belong to the best team.

My best friend's son is really good at hockey. He has been playing since 3 yrs old now 11. I don't think NHL good but great for his age.
I think they are crazy with the way hockey controls their lives. They are a fairly well off family but hockey is a very expensive sport and this is his second year playing for an out of town rep team. There is a local triple A team but the mother prefers he play on the out of town league (i think for status or something) they have to travel 2 hours for practices twice a week and tournaments 6 hours away once a month from friday to sunday. She is my best friend but i think she is crazy, the husband doesn't agrue with her about it but will not "help" out if it gets to hard getting him here and there he just gets upset that he misses school and homework time from these long practice times and that he get home so late on a school night. He says she wants him in it she will get him to it.
We have a 14 yr old and 4 yr old, the oldest has has never had an interest in any sport and the youngest does. I do not think that I will ever encourage her into something that puts that much control on our lives, there is so many other things out there. I know I would never take out a loan to pay for something that wasn't a dire need and a sport is not one of them.

I have never been into sports. SO much of them are so violent... just don't see the point. ANd my kids never wanted to do any sports either so I never had to deal with it.

But what bothered me the most... was... all the media and school and others that hype up "do sports"..."sports are where it is at"... and just promoting kids to do sports and how healthy it is etc.... okay, fine, but then they put such a huge price tag on it... and that is just for lessons and practice... that we can't afford to put them in sports. Everyone is all sports orientated.. yet no one ever does anything about the cost/fees. If you can't afford the sports... doesn't matter how much the kid wants to participate.

I am a father of two kids, and my eldest is a 13-year old girl. This early, I teach them how hard it is to make a living and they even know how to save money. But of course, I allow the to join sports and other activities that interest them.

However, they ask permission from us first before joining and we talk about it with details especially the cost.

I am just so glad that they don't force to join, if they think it will be a burden to us.

I think there is a big difference between allowing our children to enjoy and spoiling them.

Teaching them how to value money is preparing them in the future, especially when they are already grown ups and working.

Thanks!

No. If she qualified for the traveling team, that's were she belongs. If she keeps at it, she may end up with a 4 year college scholarship, and the value of that is more than likely higher than the expense of being on that traveling team.

You have your children and they are yours for a moment. I understand your sister, she want her child to have the best possible opportunity. What is the purpose of having if not to give to those we love. How do we measure what is enough?

I personally wouldn't borrow against my 401K. I would however encourage my daughter to try out for a local team, the local team might be a good platform for her to win more medals and get a chance to compete in the nationals.

That is a really hard question. I didn't know you could take a loan on a 401K for that purpose. When I had one we could only borrow over sickness or to take out a mortgage on a new home. Does your niece know her mom did that? There is some distinct educational value to allowing her to play on the traveling team, but also a bit of risk. I guess for me it would depend on the family finances and whether the IRA still had enough in it after the loan to take care of real emergencies that might arise. Too bad there isn't some kind of scholarship that could help them out.

Hi Trace86, very tough to refuse a child, isn't it? Well, ur sister may have given it a deeper thought than any of us here can do. The child is at the brink of teenage, and may be if she is denied, she would resent it and hold it against her parents. May be she would go astray! Which is what is very possible at that stage. And ur sister may be considering higher contributions in future, may be she might take up some additional job works, that earn her more and give her a chance to make up the deficit. At least I would be thinking like that.