A Dog, a Porcupine, a Pair of Pliers and a Toyota  

This morning I went out to bring my Spunky girl in for some we time. I'd finally been able to leave her outside in her run, as the neighbours from next door had returned to the city.
Or at least, I thought I'd been able to leave her in her dog run, which is where she prefers to be at night.
She wasn't there. She'd managed to escape again, but thanks to rain the night before, I could follow her tracks to the neighbours RV, and then lost them in the high grass behind the backyard.
Found her waiting by the side of the road for me at the other end of town, just this side of a copse of woods and fully ripe fall wheat fields. When I got close enough to her I could see why she was just sitting there waiting.
She had a snout full of porcupine quills. A new first for Spunky. lol She hung her head when I got out of the car and let me lead her into the backseat without any resistance at all. Another first as she usually makes a game of getting in and out of the vehicle.
She didn't seem to be in any pain, but she sure was ashamed of herself. lol
I finally screwed up my courage to remove the quills myself, as going to the city and the vet was out of the question. She was whimpering and I thought she was in pain and I should get them out fast. She was whimpering because she KNEW they had to come out and she knew it would hurt! I managed to get the first one out with a pair of pliers, but she streaked for the underside of my bed when it was out and wouldn't come near me for love or milkbones. Thirst drove her out from under the bed about two hours later and I found her in the kitchen trying to lap up water from her bowl, and not succeeding because the quills were hitting the side of the bowl and that made her whimper and back off.
So I went into town and asked every man I found to come and help me hold Spunky while I removed the rest. I knew I couldn't do it on my own, as she is too big and strong and already knew what was going to happen.
WELL EVERY MAN IN MY TOWN IS A COWARD! Not ONE of them would help, but they all sure laughed! Men are such babies!
So what to do?
Well I'm a Geek Girl right?
I came up with a Geek Girl solution.
I seat belted her into the front seat of my Toyota on the drivers side after moving the seat forward enough so she was wedged in against the steering wheel, but not under too much pressure.
Then I taped her mouth shut with electrical tape (it doesn't stick to dog hair very well, and not enough to hurt when I took it off).
I put a blindfold over her eyes and climbed into the back seat. The whole time I talked to her calmly and she remained passive.
Then I took the headrest out, and reached forward with my left hand and held her head firmly back against the seat.
With my right hand I reached around with the pliers and pulled out a quill. She tried to throw her head around, and I let her go. But she couldn't get out of the seat and soon quieted down again. Still talking soothingly to her I removed the rest of the quills with a break in between. Then I removed the blindfold and tape.
She hardly bled and when it was all over, I let her out of the car, and she just looked at me. I reached down and gently stroked her nose, and she realized that the quills were gone. When I stood up, she did something she's never done before. She jumped up, put her front paws on each of my shoulders tried to lick the freckles off my face. Spunky NEVER jumps up on people's shoulders. Ever. So..............
I think she's forgiven me. Click on her pic to see the quills........

How do you take quills out ladies. We KNOW the men can't do it without anesthetic! LOL