Shaken baby syndrome....

Hi Amy. You are right, shaking a baby can cause all of the devastating injuries, and often, death.

I cannot fathom how anyone can get so mad at a baby as to shake it, nor can I imagine, that since most hospitals in our country give "lessons" to new moms and dads right in the hospital, warning against this behavior and offering safe alternatives can still do this.

It breaks my heart.

Karen

they do that because when baby cries they it really irritates them so they shake the baby to stop crying instead of cuddle it.

Yes, and if they're that irritated, it is their own responsibility to just walk away until they are calm enough not to harm an innocent baby.

yes your right,but we cannot see our baby crying for long because we feel so worried checking what he needs by feeding her and checking her diaper and so on will then she will stop crying.just attending their needs from time to time.

Certainly, that is why one should walk away just long enough to calm down or call someone to come and help take care of the baby. Most people that are mad enough to shake a baby to death would not likely care why it is crying, whereas we who are good parents Do try to figure out the reason and calm the infant we love and care about:))

Karen

Hi Jodylee. I have raised children, and I have baby-sat for many, and never could I imagine becoming so angry with a crying infant so as to shake the very life out of it!

Most parents have spent long days and nights with a crying baby, and we take it in stride, tired or not, frustrated or not, we do not hurt an innocent child.

I also live in the States, and yes, the warnings and dangers about this behavior are very well publicized.

Thank you for responding,
Karen

Hi Journey. Welcome to MyLot.

If that child dies, he will most likely get a stiff sentence...hopefully life! What you say is exactly the advice offered to new parents by the professionals...leave the room, compose yourself, or get help with the baby to give yourself a rest.

You're right. As parents, we get exhausted, sometimes frustrated as to know how to help an infant whose only means of communication are smiles, coos, and of course, crying. So we bear with it. Love helps, too. And maturity and common sense. And again, the alternatives you suggested!

There is just no viable excuse for hurting a child, none at all.

Thank you for sharing your insights.

Karen

Hi Prasha...I think that is part of the problem...not all people do want their children.

Some have them too young or by an accidental pregnancy. Some cannot control their anger at anyone, not even a helpless infant! For those people, they would be kinder to give the baby for adoption.

Yes, this kind of information always saddens me, too. I agree, babies should be cared for well!

Thank you for your opinions.

Karen

Whether Accidental Or Otherwise .. Once You Get A Child On This Earth, It Becomes The Responsibility of The Parents To Look After The Child .. Did The Child Decide To Be Born , Of Course Not It Is The Mistake Of the Adults .. There Can Be No Pardon For Any Adult Whatever Be The Reason .. Thank You For Reading Through ..

I very much agree with you. I fail to see, anyway, how someone can "accidently" shake a baby to death.

Hello Rogue. Yes, babies are delicate, even the strongest of them are vulnerable to injury.

I like your line of reasoning and thank you for mentioning the Baby Think It Over program. Accidents can happen, sadly, of course. We are cautioned about many things in the US: not to let the baby sleep with us lest we roll over and harm it, not to shake a baby or leave its head without support when held, not to place pillow and liners and such in crib lest the baby smother, and not to shake them.

It is sad when an accidental death occurs, worse yet when the harm was inflicted purposely and repeatedly!

Thank you for your sharing your wisdom here.

Karen

Hi Lyz...you're right, no one should be around the infant if the crying bothers them like that. Mothers, fathers, older siblings, day care workers...all have been known to kill an infant out of their own anger!

The mother in this particular case had not shaken the baby, but she was arrested, too, on a lesser charge because she had seen the man shake the infant on several occasions and not reported it nor sought medical treatment for their child.

That baby had been shaken, by the father's own admission, more than 50 times, sometimes for more than five minutes at one time, since the time it was born, and they never took it to the hospital until today, when it became non-responsive.

I pray for mistreated children everywhere.

Karen

Hi Doglady. My children's crying never frustrated me either. Babies cry! They have no words yet with which to express themselves. And yes, a good parent is patient and loving, soothing.

You're right, patience is necessary!

Thank you for responding, and have a nice week.

Karen

Hi Mesuaky. You are very wise, and I am glad you have seen so many fine examples of how to be a loving and patient parent for the day you have children of your own.

I think there needs to be a special kind of prison or punishment for those who deliberately abuse or neglect children, let alone those who end up killing them.

My oldest daughter works as a nurse in a children's hospital, and I cannot fathom the horror stories she sees, the children and babies she treats, for the terrible things parents do to hurt their children. Some are simply beyond imagining!

Thank you for sharing you take on this.

Karen

Hi Bucketkid. I think most parents can identify with a sense of frustration, simply because we wish to comfort an infant who seems beyond consolation. Patience is key, though, and for those who get extremely aggravated, the should lie the baby gently down in a safe place, and walk away until they can regain their own composure. Or they could call someone to come and help for a while with the infant.

You make a good point...if a parent cannot stand the crying, imagine what they'll do at more serious times in a child's life and behavior?? The thought is truly frightening.

I agree, harming or killing and infant, or any child, is the worst crime of inhumanity I can imagine.

Karen

the point you made about calling for gelp is a good one. i think some parents would be ashamed to call someone else for help with a child - whether it be cause they cant keep their cool or need some assistance. they may not want others to think they cant cope with raising a child.

i mean, is there a parents support line? there is a support line for just about everything else - drugs, depression, life, cancer, gambling. why isnt there a general support line for these parents? if they cant reach out to someone they know, maybe just speaking to an annonymous person who could give them some advice or even calm them down.

im not saying that people in this situation would necessarily ring but if it prevents another child from being injured, isnt it worth a shot?

There are these kinds of hotlines or suport groups in every community, at least in the US.

If asking for help feels shameful, I wonder how admitting to harming or killing your child feels??

Yes, anything is worth a shot to keep this from repeatedly happening:)

Karen

My friend, like you, news like this and the pictures that go with it are atrocious to behold, to even know about! It makes one feel physically ill.

Such innocent souls deserve every care and kindness, every ounce of love, patience, and protection we as parents or any adult caring for a child can give them.

You and your wife did the same as I. When an infants needs are promptly met, it soon learns trust and a form of patience itself. These are the babies who sense they are loved and will be cared for and respond with contentment.

Children. God's greatest loving gift to us!

Karen