when plans change... wouldn't you want to be notified?
By mommyboo
@mommyboo (13174)
United States
December 2, 2009 2:43pm CST
Say you have plans with friends. If your friends go earlier, wouldn't you want to know? I know I would. I am a master at fitting in everything, even if that meant I only got 45 minutes or 20 minutes to visit, at least that's better than nothing, right?
Soooo, do you ever change your plans and not tell your friends, and do you expect them not to be disturbed that you do this? I am a big advocate of rather getting an opportunity and deciding what to do with it rather than not getting the opportunity at all. Im not sure how much clearer I could have been....
1 person likes this
6 responses
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36847)
• Pamplona, Spain
6 Dec 09
Hiya mommyboo,
Once a friend and me had planned to go to a certain place. Ok we went somewhere and to get to the other place we had to go on a Bus.
So we get on the Bus and halfway through the journey my "friend" gets up and says Bye I´ll see you I´m getting off here.
Without even looking back she got off the Bus leaving me with custard on my face so to speak talk about a quick change of plans.
Since then we have not seen so much of each other.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36847)
• Pamplona, Spain
11 Dec 09
Hiya mommyboo,
Right on and not only that it was the last straw of being invited out with her and the other Friend only to find yourself being used again as "just company". You know she talks to the other Friend and you are sort of piggy in the middle they just get so busy talking that they ignore you almost completely. Good job I have a sense of humour.
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
11 Dec 09
I think that either some people really don't care about getting together - or else plans changing don't bother them like it bothers me. I feel that anything I have to spend time planning is important, and after I have it planned, I want it to go the way it was planned. Too much energy and time and sometimes money is wasted otherwise. I am willing to compromise, if someone else is going to be early or late, I am perfectly willing to change MY arrival time if I can do it, but people have to notify me!
@34momma (13882)
• United States
2 Dec 09
I think it's rude not to tell you that plans have changed. rather it's time or location or that person is not going. i mean why would they think we would not want to know that. stuff like that makes me crazy too. I don't like to wait for people and more important i don't like when people don't allow me to make an informed decision on all the facts.
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
3 Dec 09
hi mommyboo oh yes I hate it when I am let down and not told of a change in plans, I can always understand they may have a reason but to not tell a person I think is rude. I can always adjust just so I am told in advance and not have it sprung on me as a schock. we all are pretty good at compromising given a chance.
1 person likes this
@gitfiddleplayer (10362)
• United States
2 Dec 09
Sure I would, it would make me feel like I wasn't important enough to be included. I guess you could let them know that they should only get away with it once. After that I would cease to hang out with them if they did it again.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
5 Dec 09
That did occur to me yes.... that perhaps my friends decided to not tell me about the change because they felt like getting together without me. Ordinarily this wouldn't have bothered me at all BUT because we have all been so busy and I don't get to see the one friend very often, I had been looking forward to it. I feel like I get to see her like.... once every few months and I used to talk to her every week. It's very frustrating. We're both busy, I can't blame the lack on contact on any one thing, but still, if given an opportunity I'd prefer to see her for 20 minutes vs nothing at all!
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
6 Dec 09
I always try to make sure and let my friends know when my plans have to change and I also try to give them plenty of notice that my plans have had to change. I think it is rude when someone doesn't let you know that their plans have changed.
The latest example of this in my life was actually just yesterday. I was supposed to take my son and two nieces to a playgroup at 10:30 in the morning. Well, the night prior I had spent a portion of the evening at the emergency room with my husband, so I was already worn out to a certain degree. Then, when my sister-in-law brought the girls over at 8 in the morning and they were both very grouchy, I went ahead then and let my friend know that we would not be able to make it while there was still a couple of hours notice.
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
11 Dec 09
When people know with a few hours or even an hour's notice, they can decide if they want to not go, or go anyway - or say you decided to go EARLIER... for instance. I think that is fair and the least someone can expect from another. I know that hardly anybody rsvps to things any more, I am even bad about it, but I expect rsvps to plan for parties so I can make sure I have enough food! LOL!
