To what extent you Agree to Disagree?
By Shiva
@Shiva49 (28380)
Singapore
January 26, 2021 8:26am CST
I have come across many from varying backgrounds. Some are ready to agree to disagree as a matter of habit while there are the few who never agree to a different approach to an issue. I am the middle road – consider the other points of view and then back them if that is the majority view after making clear my own take.
In Asian societies it was rather a norm for the older generation to express their views and expect the younger to follow them. Now as times have changed the older generation is circumspect in offering views or advice as the young have their own take that they think are more practical and suited to the times.
I think it is a positive sign that the young choose to make their own decisions and take responsibility for them. A rigid approach could have exacerbated tensions across the world and a more flexible relationship should soothe the tensions. Intransigence and my way or the highway should be discarded for healthy relationships.
The biggest challenge is to make a smooth transition towards greater acceptance of others’ views as long as they don’t hurt us. No one likes to be belittled and we can all coexist with a bit of change in our approach and attitude without loss of face.
I yearn for this much needed change to make our world more livable. Let us try to follow those that work and do more than pay lip service to what we know is the ideal way. Being less tyrannical and more of accepting the diversity should change the landscape.
How much leeway do you give to opposing views?
Image: Agree to Disagree - Free Image
14 people like this
13 responses
@Shiva49 (28380)
• Singapore
28 Jan 21
Yes, we progress that way than by holding on to views cast in stone.
Having interacted with people with different backgrounds and culture, I keep learning about life all the time. Scratch the surface, we are similar with same emotions but to varying degrees
1 person likes this
@innertalks (23739)
• Australia
27 Jan 21
I am a rebel, in that in the first instance, I nearly always disagree with whatever the other person has said.
Depending on their response to my disgreeance, I take it then from there.
If they are open to healthy conversational debate, I carry on with that, if not, I simply withdrawer, and let them keep their own one tracked idea of things too.
My approach has often landed me in hot water, and even lost me jobs, at times, but I never like to just accept what anyone has said at face value, but always want to chew over it a bit.
2 people like this
@innertalks (23739)
• Australia
27 Jan 21
@Shiva49 Yes, your approach is a very good one, as you usually know where you are coming from, as your conscience keeps you to the right path.
Others who are not so sure of themselves, are not so clear about where they come from, or what their view really is, and so they are often putting advice out there, which is like a feeler to test the waters first, before they make their final decisions.
@Shiva49 (28380)
• Singapore
27 Jan 21
@innertalks Then it depends also on our general approach. Some are aggressive, risk-takers, gung-ho.
We need them in the team too and also those like me who are more circumspect.
In business, it is more of team effort than individuality. One big boss liked to tell at meetings -. Let us get through the ritual of meetings, but at the end of the day you are all entitled to "my view".
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (28380)
• Singapore
27 Jan 21
I try to put myself in others' shoes to understand their take on matters.
I give some leeway to mood swings that some are prone to.
Then I put across my point of view diplomatically when needed and to suit the occasion.
Then, over time, if I cannot reconcile to the goings-on, I mentally make up my mind to move on without rancor.
I have benefited also from differing views and perspectives and they have helped me to understand, empathize, with others. I find it difficult when egos lead others and they then try to shove their views down others throats. Most will like to explain their course of action though.
What matters to me is to make it clear where I come from and why. That adds to the overall take on matters. For me, the end should be justifiable and the means not hurtful.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (502427)
• Italy
3 Feb 21
When I was young, we had to listen to our parents and respect their decisions. Growing up I thought that it was important to let them know if I agreed or disagreed on something. Being polite is important, not to argue, but just explain our decisions.
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (24004)
• United Kingdom
9 Feb 21
I certainly agree with you but these days l tend to sit back and watch the show!
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (24004)
• United Kingdom
9 Feb 21
@Shiva49 Yes l think older and wiser we can sit back and watch then give our guidance.
1 person likes this
@MarshaMusselman (38865)
• Midland, Michigan
1 Feb 21
I can agree to disagree more outside my home than in it. That could be because my hubby always wants to be right, I don't know.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (79324)
• Germany
5 Feb 21
I can relate to that Asian norm that you are speaking but as an adult person who is no longer living in Asia for ages, I try to be open minded and to weigh the opinions of others. But I still stay on my opinion when I think I am right and the others are wrong.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (37621)
•
2 Feb 21
It seems there is no tolerance for disagreement over issues today. On social media sites views are frequently attacked because they are opposite of another's views. And when I say that, I don't mean respectful disagreement. Instead it becomes a personal attack on that person's character. You see it at times even on My Lot especially with political views. I tend to base my views on facts not emotional appeals. If the facts are presented in a rational manner I listen and weigh the argument instead of dismissing it at hand. Life is not always one way or the other. Oftentimes there is a lot of adapting when shaping one's views.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (28380)
• Singapore
2 Feb 21
I always try to ascertain the agenda behind the thinking and action.
I like to go for those that are not selfish as they give the best returns in terms of peace of mind.
I think we get carried away by politicians who have only personal agenda which they put above that of common folks. Those in opposition oppose what they had supported while in power. They hardly agree on any common agenda to benefit the majority.
We should also keep in mind our freedom is in peril. The despotic regimes are gaining the upper hand in every way with military and monetary muscle. The United States seems to be Divided States due to irrational exuberance of freedom and democracy. The enemy is within and can bring the house down.
Others are watching from outside for an implosion.
Yes, when the majority good look in dismay a minority will carry the day.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (28380)
• Singapore
3 Feb 21
@dgobucks226 Thanks, we need to look at the reality of the world.
The US has been the beacon and bastion of democracy and freedom. There have been closer elections even in the recent past but the system prevailed. So why such hullabaloo without any concrete proof?
China has been assertive everywhere and other countries are under their thumb increasingly. The world needs a strong US to sustain freedom but the internal strife there has been a dampener for everyone.
The paramount leader of China, Deng Xiaoping, said decades ago "The United States brags about its political system, but the President says one thing during the election, something else when he takes office, something else at midterm and something else when he leaves." Now things are much worse! There are no winners really and the common folks pay the price.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (37621)
•
3 Feb 21
@Shiva49 Very good analysis. Politicians main goal is to get re-elected by promising voters/citizens what they want to hear. Unfortunately or fortunately much of what they promise is unrealistic to achieve without a clear majority being in favor. The U.S. being a Democracy is supposed to entertain different views and work together to come up with the best compromise for all (most) Americans. This is what is fair and rationale societies do. In our current environment those with different opinions from the party currently in power are shut down, ridiculed and attacked. There seems no desire to work together just a lust for power and control which unifies no one. 
1 person likes this
