Indirect compliments are the best.

@TheHorse (157787)
Walnut Creek, California
June 26, 2022 1:05pm CST
My guitar (and piano) student Anabella will be performing with me today at Guitar Center. She is 8-years-old. I told her she could make up the set list. I think we will do Mary Had a Little Lamb, Smoke on the Water, Roundabout by Yes, and the ABC song. But I'll just go with the flow. Her father gave me a lovely compliment the other day. But it was indirect. The best kind, because it was sincere, not just someone being polite. Horse: We have our guitar tunes ready for the "open mic" this weekend, but we also worked on piano. I have shown her the beginning to Bach's Minuet in G." Dad: That is great. I'm glad she is learning some piano as well. Horse: I will keep teaching her guitar by ear. With piano, I will eventually show her reading notes. Dad: I admire anyone who can play music. Horse: Some day, someone can help her learn classical guitar. which requires reading notes. But for now, we are both happy with things as they are. Dad: Someone? You are her teacher. I don't want another teacher . Horse: Oh, I mean years down the road. The best musicians can play by ear and also read music... I was honored that her dad did not want "anther teacher" involved. Anabella and I have made great progress, and she is a "trooper." She is not the least bit intimidated by performing in front of people. I will, at some point, show her musical notes and tie them in with piano. But her progress on guitar, using chords, tab, and her ear, has been great. Have you ever received an "indirect" compliment? I enjoy them the most.
14 people like this
15 responses
@DaddyEvil (88283)
• United States
26 Jun
The dad obviously appreciated what you've been teaching his daughter! Congrats! Most people think anyone can teach the same thing, just as well as someone else, whether that's true or not. I really hope the concert goes well. (Did you practice so you won't embarrass your student? ) Enjoy yourself.
4 people like this
@DaddyEvil (88283)
• United States
26 Jun
@TheHorse I'm glad everything went well. And congrats to her for surprising you! (I bet that doesn't happen very often. )
4 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Jun
@DaddyEvil Life is like a box of chocolates...
4 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
No, we didn't practice. She pulled a surprise on me, but it went fine. I enjoy her attitude. She's a trooper.
4 people like this
@TheSojourner (51987)
• United States
26 Jun
It had been a very long time since I've received any face to face compliments, until the other day when someone whom I met in a classroom years ago that I was teaching, and I went out for coffee the other day. She gave me a direct compliment that took me off guard. I don't know how to deal with them when they slap me in the face like that. I think that the indirect compliments are easier, and it's easier to know how to handle accepting them when they aren't so in your face.
2 people like this
• United States
26 Jun
@TheHorse I get it.
2 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
@TheSojourner I thought you might.
2 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
If I see a former college student, and they say, "I really enjoyed your class," I can handle it. In one of my text books, being able to accept direct compliments is seen as a sign of "self-love" (not narcissism). But indirect compliments may carry more weight.
3 people like this
@Tina30219 (78375)
• Onaway, Michigan
26 Jun
I have it has been a long time though
1 person likes this
@Tina30219 (78375)
• Onaway, Michigan
26 Jun
@TheHorse Hard to tell
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Jun
@Tina30219 For some, sad to say, it's because acknowledging another's success makes them feel lesser. There's a little Cain and Abel in all of us.
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
Why is it so hard for people to give sincere compliments?
@RasmaSandra (56393)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
27 Jun
That is a wonderful compliment and I agree with you,
2 people like this
@JudyEv (283236)
• Rockingham, Australia
27 Jun
That was certainly a very sincere compliment. I hope the day goes well. Actually, it's possible over by now so I hope it went well.
2 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Jun
It's Monday morning now. I mixed up some Miracle Grow solution so the kids' plants can grow big and tall. I'll put the solution on there and ask the kids to water the hck out of the plants. We harvested some green beans last week!
2 people like this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
5 Jul
@JudyEv They did. But the green beans themselves were a bit bitter. Not enough water.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (283236)
• Rockingham, Australia
28 Jun
@TheHorse The kids would get a real kick out of picking beans they'd helped grow.
2 people like this
@SonjaRae (11435)
• United States
26 Jun
That is the best compliment! Those genuine moments that can lift one's spirits and make one smile from the inside!
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
I am glad her dad appreciates my efforts.
1 person likes this
@SonjaRae (11435)
• United States
26 Jun
@TheHorse Most definitely. So I have a question for you. I acquired my Dad's Old Guitar and it needs to be restrung and I really want to teach myself to play. I don't know what to look for as far as string replacement and tuning goes. We have a Guitar Center here, do you recommend them? Anything I should pay close attention to when looking for a place?
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
@SonjaRae Guitar Center should be able to handle it. First, talk to the guitar tech and show him (or her) your guitar. Ask whether you need "lights" or "mediums." Buy some Martin strings for about $7 and have the tech put them on. If the tech is "cool," have him "lecture" you about what he does so you can do it in the future. New strings tend to go out of tune. Find the tuner "app" on your phone and try to keep your guitar "in tune." Then use the internet to learn the basic chords, like G, D, C, and e-minor.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (91020)
• India
28 Jun
I prefer direct. Basically, I am a cynic. If somebody paid me a compliment, I would be what...this person does not know the real me...LOL. But I am not good at deciphering indirect compliments or whatever. So I don't bother with second guessing. Like this guy when he said you are her teacher, I don't want another teacher. I'd end up analyzing that...is he trying to save monies, trying to say he cannot afford another teacher, if he wanted to pay a compliment, he might have said, I doubt if I can find anybody better than you to teach her music. Or is he trying to say...ok...you are being paid, do your job of teaching. So yeah..interpretation of the same sentence varies from person to person. I don't focus on it so much.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
5 Jul
He could have any other teacher there for the same price.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (401246)
• Switzerland
27 Jun
This is a great compliment for sure, you must be proud of yourself.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (401246)
• Switzerland
27 Jun
@TheHorse Some young girls and boys are so happy of what they experience, it is wonderful.
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Jun
I am. I'm good at what I do. But I'm REALLY proud of my little student. She's only eight and has no fear of performing.
1 person likes this
@xander6464 (35514)
• Wapello, Iowa
30 Jun
I still have a lot of trouble getting direct comments. I don't think I'm ready to try for indirect comments.
1 person likes this
@xander6464 (35514)
• Wapello, Iowa
6 Jul
@TheHorse This reminds me of when I worked at Bletchley Park.
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
5 Jul
"?stnemmoc nwodedispu"
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (58534)
• Marion, Ohio
27 Jun
That was a wonderful one.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (91020)
• India
29 Jun
I realize that what you all are reading as a compliment would not qualify as one based on local languages here, and my mind does some translation so....
@paigea (35276)
• Canada
28 Jun
A great compliment. I find compliments difficult.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
5 Jul
Giving them? Or receiving them?
1 person likes this
@paigea (35276)
• Canada
5 Jul
@TheHorse Both! Except to students. And from them I guess.
@RubyHawk (67460)
• Atlanta, Georgia
28 Jun
I have and as you say they’re the best kind.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (91020)
• India
29 Jun
You mean to say if I said you have a great sense of humor, you are not gonna like it. But if I said, I had fun interacting with you the other day, you would?
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (99898)
• United States
27 Jun
How nice to get some recognition for a job well done. I haven't received any compliments in a long time.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
28 Jun
@LindaOHio Why is it so hard to give compliments where compliments are due?.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
27 Jun
I enjoy your comments and posts on MyLot. How's that?
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (99898)
• United States
27 Jun
@TheHorse Awww Thanks!
www.
1 person likes this
@Nakitakona (51056)
• Philippines
5 Jul
Her father likes you as a teacher of his daughter. He doesn't need someone to teach his daughter.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
5 Jul
He realizes that I am a good and motivating teacher for his daughter. But I sometimes think I could show HIM how to be her piano teacher.
1 person likes this
@Nakitakona (51056)
• Philippines
6 Jul
@TheHorse I know you may and you can handle for kid's bright future.
@1creekgirl (32804)
• United States
26 Jun
What a wonderful compliment that was truly sincere.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (157787)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Jun
Exactly. And she "styled" today. We did Roundabout, Mary Had a Little Lamb, and a quick blues number. I gave her daddy my email so he could send me "cute photos" or even a video of our performance.
1 person likes this