Tough Year, But Things are Getting Better!

Laguna Woods, California
July 29, 2023 2:14pm CST
The past year has been a tough one for me, so most of you have not seen much of me on MyLot. I finally felt ready to write a post about everything that has been going on, so you knew what has been happening with me, and why I have spent so little time on the site. Deaths My father died of Covid 18 months ago, in December, 2021. Six month later, last June, 2022, a woman I had known for 35 years also died of Covid. Then, last September, as I shared in another post, my friend Gloria, who wrote as Domestic-DivaOnline, died of lung cancer. In December, 2023, a friend I had known for 23 years died of COPD. This past January, 2023, a childhood friend I had known for over 60 years died of Covid. All these deaths were overwhelming to me. My Husband's Health Continued to Decline As some of you know, my husband has Stage 5 kidney failure, heart failure, a type of blood cancer (called MDS or pre-leukemia), and dementia. Although we have a caregiver three days a week, I am his primary caregiver and it can be very time-consuming. I Had Some Health Problems of My Own On top of all that, I also had some recent health issues. On March 2, 2023, I had a total knee replacement on my left knee. While undergoing physical therapy for my knee, I was having trouble breathing. They discovered that I had adenocarcinoma or lung cancer in my upper right lung. After six weeks spent getting a biopsy, PET scan, lung function test and other medical appointments, I had the upper one-third of my right lung removed. Since then, I have continued to have more physical therapy! Six weeks after the lung cancer surgery, on July 5, 2023, I caught Covid for the first time. It was a huge setback, because I was exhausted. Covid was the last thing my lungs needed, especially so soon after surgery. In addition, after having several friends die of either Covid or lung cancer in the past year, the fact that I had both of these diseases was frightening for me. As you can all see, it's been a tough year, but things do seem to be getting better, and I do have some reasons to celebrate. The doctors will continue to monitor me, but they believe they were able to remove all the cancer. I recovered from Covid. I still have trouble breathing, but it is getting better every day. One of my daughters got married in early July (which is how I got Covid), and we had a wonderful family celebration before everyone got sick! Hopefully, I can be a little more active on MyLot, but if I disappear sometimes, it will probably be because I am dealing with all the stuff going on in my life ... caring for my husband, or dealing with my own health issues. However, I also wanted to assure you all that I enjoy MyLot and think of all of you often! I hope to touch base with some of you as often as I can. Hugs to you all!
27 people like this
26 responses
@Juliaacv (47683)
• Canada
29 Jul
I have often thought of you and wondered how you were doing. I am sorry that you have had health issues, and that you have lost so many loved ones. It sounds like you are still the pillar of the family-they are very lucky to have you. My Dad used to have a saying........'aging isn't for the faint of heart' and I think of his words now that I am 60, and they really ring true more and more each and every day. I have so much respect for people like yourself, caring for their spouse through dementia, that is a cruel illness. Stay well Diane.
5 people like this
@Juliaacv (47683)
• Canada
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane My aunt uses that saying. They must be from the same generation.
2 people like this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@Juliaacv - Yes, I imagine that they were from the same generation. Those are good quotes for all of us to remember as we age!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@Juliaacv - Thank you so much. I agree with your Dad that "aging isn't for the faint of heart." I also had a friend who used to say, "Getting old ain't for sissies."
3 people like this
• Preston, England
29 Jul
Glad you have come through such horrid times - I too had (bowel) cancer a few years back - best wishes for the future
2 people like this
• Preston, England
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane I interact with many people facing cancer - survivor stories are very important to all of us
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@arthurchappell - I agree that it helps me to interact with other people who are facing cancer, are who are doing well after having faced it in the past. It is good "medicine" for me!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@arthurchappell - Bowel cancer is another bad one. Thank you for sharing this with me. It encourages me to hear from other people who are cancer survivors.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130109)
• India
30 Jul
Good to see you. That was far too much any one can handle. Hope you see better days.
2 people like this
@allknowing (130109)
• India
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane Staying positive helps.
2 people like this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@allknowing - Things are getting better every day, and that is all I can ask for.
3 people like this
@kaylachan (54534)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
29 Jul
Real life tends to suck sometimes. Not much you can do. You're here and alive still, that's alone is a lot. Good luck.
2 people like this
@kaylachan (54534)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane Yep, you're young!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@kaylachan - Yes, real life tends to suck sometimes. However, I think of myself as a "survivor." At 74, I know so many people who have not lived as long as me. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones!
2 people like this
@RubyHawk (99439)
• Atlanta, Georgia
30 Jul
It’s good to hear from you. I’m so sorry for the deaths and health problems. All my best wishes go out to you and your husband. I’m glad you stopped by mylot to let us hear from you.
2 people like this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@RubyHawk - I know that on these sites, like MyLot, it feels strange when someone just disappears. We all wonder what happened to them. I just wanted everyone to know I'm "still alive and kickin'".
1 person likes this
@RubyHawk (99439)
• Atlanta, Georgia
31 Jul
@DeborahDiane It’s good to hear from you. Drop by when you have time to say hello.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (25839)
30 Jul
That is a huge load to carry and live through. I am really sorry you have had so many things happen. And Covid cost us so much loss. I lost family members as well. Then you've had to be a caregiver and try to overcome your own medical problems. I hope you have a bit of help to get you through these tough times. I don't have the right words to say, but you have an admirable positive attitude, good for you!
2 people like this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@MarieCoyle - Your words were perfect. Yes, I am so fortunate that I do have help. We have a caregiver who comes to our house three days a week, and a nurse comes to check on my husband once a week. Getting the help at home has been such a gift. I know I am more fortunate than a lot of people who are going through similar situations.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
31 Jul
@MarieCoyle - Thank you. Yes, having help has made a huge difference for me!
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (25839)
31 Jul
@DeborahDiane I honestly don't know how you can carry such a load, that's just a lot to deal with. But I am glad you do have some help.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (156425)
• Boise, Idaho
30 Jul
Hugs to you too dear lady. Wow! Just Wow! You have certainly had more than your share. I look forward to seeing you on here and hearing how you are doing. Keep on keepin' on.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (156425)
• Boise, Idaho
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane .........Glad to hear you are feeling better.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@celticeagle - It feels good just to have the time and energy and get on MyLot and do other things. I was so exhausted all the time until recently!
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (81971)
• Wheat Ridge, Colorado
23 Sep
I had missed this one..I am so sorry for all that is happening..you will be in my prayers..it sounds so mundane saying that..but I mean it and..I am so sorry for your suffering along with your husbands..cant say enough of how I admire your will and determination..courage.
1 person likes this
• Wheat Ridge, Colorado
23 Sep
@DeborahDiane Try to let us know when you can xo
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
23 Sep
@RebeccasFarm - Thank you so much for your kind words. It has been a rough year but, going into fall, things seem to have stabilized. I hope we don't have anymore health surprises soon!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
24 Sep
@RebeccasFarm - So far, they think they got all the cancer and I have not needed chemo or radiation treatments. I have more tests ahead, but I feel encouraged. On the other hand, my husband's health continues to decline. Yesterday, he had a bad fall. He didn't break any bones, but he is very sore this morning.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (451814)
• Switzerland
30 Jul
As we chat every day I know of all your problems, but I am sure that many here are glad to know that you are now find. You had so many problems, I hope that you can relax and rest now. Hugs to you.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (451814)
• Switzerland
31 Jul
@DeborahDiane - I think it was a good idea to write this post. Often sharing our negative past experiences help to move on and now your myLot friends know why you were not active here.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
31 Jul
@LadyDuck - Yes, writing it feels like a load has been lifted from my shoulders. People were sending me private messages asking if I was OK, so I thought I would write a general message.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@LadyDuck - Yes, I plan to rest, relax and get outside and enjoy the fresh air every day, if possible. I wanted to write this post and put all these negative experiences behind me. On with the new!
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (91941)
• Marion, Ohio
29 Jul
. You have had a rough year. I really hope things keep getting better with your health.
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (91941)
• Marion, Ohio
30 Jul
@DeborahDiane Everything takes time.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@wolfgirl569 - Thank you so much. Gradually, I am getting better. I can feel that my lungs and breathing are slowly improving!
1 person likes this
• West Haven, Connecticut
9 Aug
I tend to disappear myself but that's life , Sending positive vibes your way!
1 person likes this
• West Haven, Connecticut
10 Aug
@DeborahDiane Amen to that
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
10 Aug
@BACONSTRIPSXXX - Thanks for the positive vibes. I'm growing stronger and feeling a little better every day. That's all I can hope for.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (201914)
• Walnut Creek, California
30 Jul
Sorry it's been such a rough year. I'm glad things are starting to look up. I hope you stay around.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (201914)
• Walnut Creek, California
31 Aug
@DeborahDiane Glad to hear that. I've had kind of a rough year as well. But I see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
31 Aug
@TheHorse - Yeah, some years are harder than others. Sometimes, it can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but eventually things do get better ... I hope!
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@TheHorse - I feel much better just knowing that I have the time and energy for MyLot and other things, now. For the past few months, I have just not had the strength to even think about doing anything that was not absolutely necessary! I plan to stick around for a while!
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (15493)
• Raurkela, India
30 Jul
Love the way you are taking life positively. Hope everything goes towards the better side. We would love to have you in mylot for long.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@aninditasen - Yes, I do feel more positive about the future. People are not dying of Covid as much, and my own health has improved a lot!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
31 Jul
@aninditasen - Covid deaths have decreased dramatically in the U.S., too, but we also have other diseases that kill people. I guess we are not meant to live forever!
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (15493)
• Raurkela, India
31 Jul
@DeborahDiane Deaths due to covid has decreased but there are other diseases in India like dengue and flu.
1 person likes this
@Treborika (16692)
• Mombasa, Kenya
30 Jul
I pray for you that all goes well with the health of your husband and you. May both of you get well soon.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@Treborika - I am doing much better, which makes it easier to cope with everything else. Sadly, my husband's health probably will not improve, but I hope that his decline slows down.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
31 Jul
@Treborika - Thank you. I think that the Lord does not intend us to live forever, and we have to accept that as we get older.
@Treborika (16692)
• Mombasa, Kenya
31 Jul
@DeborahDiane I pray that the health of your husband improves. I learned that everything is possible before the lord
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (166945)
• United States
29 Jul
Oh my, what can I say besides Bless your heart! So sorry!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@snowy22315 - Thanks so much. "Bless Your Heart" sums it up, doesn't it?
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (166945)
• United States
30 Jul
1 person likes this
@much2say (53368)
• Los Angeles, California
29 Jul
My heart goes out to you in these difficult pandemic years - you've been through SO much. Sending my deepest condolences for all your loved ones lost. Keeping both you and your husband in my thoughts as you continue to heal and take care of your husband. No worries about here . . . I'm sure many of us think often of you too . . . glad you came to visit us today .
1 person likes this
@much2say (53368)
• Los Angeles, California
30 Jul
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@much2say - Yes, we have been through a lot, but I do feel like I am starting to heal. I'm sure there will be ups and downs, but hopefully nothing like what I have been through the past year.
1 person likes this
@mom210 (9019)
• United States
18 Oct
I'm so sorry, I am glad things are a bit better. I hope they continue to get better
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
18 Oct
@mom210 - Thank you. So far, I have not had to do chemotherapy for my lung cancer, although that is still a possibility in the future. Right now, I am starting to feel better and hope I don't need chemo.
1 person likes this
@paigea (35407)
• Canada
30 Jul
I am sorry for all your losses. That sounds overwhelming. It's great to hear from you. I hope you gain some strength and feel better. You are dealing with so much. Take care
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@paigea - I'm starting to feel better all the time. Things were rough for a while.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26120)
• Singapore
30 Jul
Indeed a tough time but you are winning the battle back to good health. Caring for others while not in the pink of health ourselves is never easy.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@Shiva49 - Yes, I feel as if I have been fighting in a war, and now I am winning the health battle. It is a good feeling!
1 person likes this
@tom_view (6395)
• Kolkata, India
30 Jul
hopefully things will continue to get better from now
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Jul
@tom_view - I think that things will continue to get better. I certainly hope so!