Council complaints!
By Gary Marsh
@garymarsh6 (23784)
United Kingdom
July 28, 2025 4:36am CST
This appeared on my time line something I had shared to years ago which I found hilarious & I am sharing with you.
Only in Britain -Complaints to Councils
Extracts from letters written by council tenants:
1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.
2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.
5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.
6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.
9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.
11. The next door neighbour has got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.
14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.
15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.
16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.
18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife..
20. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction
21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.
22. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
The photos is from wiki what a typical council house looks like in the UK
10 people like this
10 responses
@DaddyEvil (156817)
• United States
28 Jul





3 people like this

@DaddyEvil (156817)
• United States
29 Jul
@garymarsh6 I agree. I was giggling all the way through that list. 
Edit to add: I sent a link to this discussion to Pretty so she could get the giggles, too. 





2 people like this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
29 Jul
@DaddyEvil Todays post will be about complaints to Travel Agents. Really some people should not be allowed to travel out of the country.
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
I think the way the sentences are constructed they are hilarious.
2 people like this

@xFiacre (14142)
• Ireland
28 Jul
@garymarsh6 I would love to invite all those complainers in for a private interview. I’m going to be tittering the rest of today.
3 people like this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
I will try & find holiday complaints which is just as funny.
2 people like this

@rsa101 (39838)
• Philippines
29 Jul
@garymarsh6 I can now see the context. However, I must admit that some of them are hilariously stated.
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
These were taken from tenants who have compaints something is not working in their rented accomodation for which the council are responmsible for repairing. I think they shoot off their complaint without noticing that it can be taken in a comical way rather than serious way.
2 people like this


@LadyDuck (481759)
• Italy
29 Jul
@garymarsh6 - I am sure that most of them did not re read what they had written.

1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
29 Jul
@LadyDuck Absolutely which makes it even funnier!
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
They are funny they obviously did not re read what they had written. 



2 people like this

@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
Sometimes people shoot off letters without fully reading what they have written & the different conotations it can have! 

1 person likes this
@Fleura (32351)
• United Kingdom
29 Jul
@garymarsh6 Yes, you can see what they are trying to say, maybe it's just us that reads them differently! 

@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
They have a double entendre. Very typical British humour. I will see if l can find the ones to travel agents which are absolutely barmy.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (361001)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Jul
@garymarsh6 I'll watch out for them. 

2 people like this
@BarBaraPrz (50253)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
28 Jul
Someone worked very hard to get that wording just right... 

1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (23784)
• United Kingdom
28 Jul
There are even funnier complaints about peoples holidays from travel agents. I will have to dig around and find one too. These complaints can be read in two ways serious or hilarious.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (178436)
• Boise, Idaho
28 Jul
That's a fun read. Sentences can be fun if not formed correctly.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (151785)
• India
29 Jul
One if better than the other
I liked the one that says his wife slipped and fell and now she is pregnant.
1 person likes this
@JESSY3236 (20889)
• United States
29 Jul
lol I am going to send this to my mother. She's painter and she would love this.
