Time for a change
By Lena Kovadlo
@lovebuglena (49926)
Staten Island, New York
March 10, 2026 3:22pm CST
I am living in my mother‘s first house that she never sold. My parents bought this house in 1998 and I lived here with them from that year until they bought their second house—don’t remember what year that was—where I lived with them until I met my husband.
After I met him and we got serious, we moved into this house. That was back in 2015 and we have lived here all this time.
When I was living here with my husband, it was okay. But now that I’m living here alone I’m not so sure I wanna be here anymore. The house is three stories plus a basement. That’s too much for one person. There’s a backyard I never use. The house is surrounded by cemeteries. And it’s far from transportation.
It is time for me to move. I just have no idea where… I definitely want to be somewhere that’s closer to transportation, that has a grocery store and a pharmacy nearby, and preferably a library. It would also be great if there is a park nearby, but that’s not a necessity. And it would be great if I was closer to my mother.
I don’t wanna live in a house anymore. I’d prefer a roomy apartment. I’m not sure if there’s anything like that available where I live—to buy, not rent—where the price is not through the roof expensive. Will have to do some searching online. Maybe getting a real estate person involved might be helpful.
And then this house will have to be put on the market. Hopefully it’ll sell quickly, but who knows.
I’m not sure how this thing works. Do you first buy another place and then sell this one? Do you do it simultaneously? Or do you sell this place and then start looking for a new one? But then where would you live before you find it?
8 people like this
7 responses
@LindaOHio (216371)
• United States
11 Mar
You can do it a variety of ways. Each has its pros and cons. I would prefer to find a place first and then sell the house. It's up to you.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Mar
I’d prefer that as well. However, that means paying for two places—utilities, other fees associated with the house or condo—until you sell the house.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
12 Mar
@LindaOHio my mother is gonna help me with that. Obviously, I cannot afford it myself.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (216371)
• United States
12 Mar
@lovebuglena How are you going to afford buying/renting a house? I don't mean to be nosy; but you don't have any income do you?
@JudyEv (374256)
• Rockingham, Australia
12 Mar
@lovebuglena Cousin-in-law is a bit removed from your ex unless they're good friends. An AI platform could probably give you a lot of background information.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
12 Mar
@JudyEv that’s his first cousin‘s wife. Officially we’re still married. We just live in different places and he doesn’t keep in touch with me. Not one text this year. And I have no idea where he lives.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Mar
I think we’d need to talk to a real estate agent. I was thinking of asking my husband’s cousin-in-law but hesitant to do so as we are currently not together.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
10 Mar
Finding an apartment to buy is not easy for sure.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (186712)
• Boise, Idaho
10 Mar
It should be fun to begin looking for a smaller place. Do you need to sell first? Storing stuff would be like moving twice. Give it some time and think about your options. Maybe find a good real estate agent and talk with them.
@celticeagle (186712)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Mar
@lovebuglena ........If the market is good, you may sell quickly. It all depends.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
10 Mar
That’s what I’m not sure about. Ideally it will be more convenient to buy first then move all the stuff to the new place and then sell. I am not sure how realistic that is though.
2 people like this
@porwest (111869)
• United States
11 Mar
Sometimes you can make a deal with the buyer that they let you rent from them after closing until you can find a place. Granted, not all will be onboard with that. They have their own situations. You could live in a hotel for a spell, maybe finding one that's made for extended stays.
Best of luck to you either way.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Mar
Thank you. Moving into a hotel would be expensive. Plus, all my stuff would have to go into storage.
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Mar
I could temporarily live with my mom, however, again I’d need storage for all my stuff.
@Ineeddentures (21945)
•
10 Mar
I have no idea how you go about it Lena
But I do know that you will need money to buy an apartment
If you sell the house you are on will you get all the money from the sale
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
10 Mar
Preferably my mom would want to sell this house first and then use that money to buy an apartment. However, I have no idea if that’s gonna be possible.
1 person likes this
@Ineeddentures (21945)
•
10 Mar
@lovebuglena
Maybe you could seek legal advice about this at the same time as you seek legal advice about how you stand financially with Lenny
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (95280)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
10 Mar
I can bet you would love the neighborhood I was born and raised in Bay Ridge. Most things are within walking distance. Where does your mom live?
@lovebuglena (49926)
• Staten Island, New York
10 Mar
My mom lives in Staten Island by the Verrazano bridge. I live in Staten Island as well, just more towards the middle of it. I would prefer to stay in Staten Island. If I were to move to Brooklyn I’d potentially wanna live somewhere close to Coney Island, Brighton Beach area because that’s where many of my relatives live. I do like Bay Ridge though.
1 person likes this
