I Am Getting The Cold Shoulder

@flapiz (24478)
United Kingdom
August 19, 2026 4:52am CST
I have been out of work for 6 and a half months now and things are finally looking up. I had a good interview from a week ago and she wants for me to do a trial shift as soon as possible but before this she requires that procure my previous DBS check from my previous employer. I emailed my manager regarding this right after my interview and gave her a week to reply as I recognise she is a very busy woman. But she has not responded to my email at all. I tried texting her on WhatsApp and also no response. I cannot understand why I am getting the cold shoulder. When I was working there I was diligent and professional but I feel like she is deliberately ignoring me. I may just be overthinking but I feel like this is so wrong.
18 people like this
17 responses
@LadyDuck (505116)
• Italy
19 Aug
This is frustrating, why not to get the phone and call her?
3 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
I shall do that I think. I have been already patient and considerate enough. No one is this busy. I kinda feel like she is deliberately ignoring me.
3 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
@LadyDuck I tried a call and did not go through so maybe she is on a holiday.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (505116)
• Italy
19 Aug
@flapiz -She is very rude, but it's also possible that she is vacationing. Try calling her.
1 person likes this
@Nawsheen (29001)
• Mauritius
19 Aug
I would be annoyed too. After a week, an email and a WhatsApp message, the least she could do is acknowledge you, even if she is too busy to deal with it immediately. Considering this is holding up a possible job opportunity, ignoring you altogether feels very inconsiderate and unprofessional. I hope there is someone else at the company you can contact so you are not left depending on her response.
3 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
It just feels very unprofessional. I think if she was on holiday I would get more consideration as there would at least be an automated email about her being away. Many mylot friends suggest I just call her and so let me try that route if she ignores my call then there is something very wrong.
2 people like this
@LeaPea2417 (40043)
• Toccoa, Georgia
19 Aug
@flapiz I hope she is not a scammer.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
@LeaPea2417 she finally responded today I think pestering her worked.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (132131)
• United States
19 Aug
I hope you can just call her to make sure you just get a straight answer from her.
2 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
Yes I think I shall do that.
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (179042)
• United States
19 Aug
Shouldn't that be something each employer does before you start a new job. That's the way it works in the US.
2 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
I thought so too it looks like dental clinics do not have much budget for anything.
2 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
@DaddyEvil my manager finally responded today and said she will ask HR so I assume another week of waiting. But luckily I went on another interview today and this one seems to provide their own DBS. It is the new employer’s responsibility I did clarify with the internet but I guess the previous job interview was looking to cut cost.
1 person likes this
@DaddyEvil (179042)
• United States
20 Aug
@flapiz If they cut an important cost like that, you might not WANT to work for them.
@JudyEv (390533)
• Rockingham, Australia
19 Aug
This must be so frustrating. I wonder why she won't reply. Can you get in touch by phoning?
2 people like this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
I wonder as well. It feels like she is ignoring me purposely. Everyone is saying to just call her and I think I shall do so thank you.
2 people like this
@Wrexxo (10387)
•
19 Aug
Just put a call through to her ..she needs to know how urgent it is
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
19 Aug
I tried calling her today but it seems maybe she is out of country I could not get through.
1 person likes this
@Wrexxo (10387)
•
19 Aug
@flapiz so , what are you gonna do?
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
@Wrexxo she replied today and hopefully the HR can provide it for me. Meanwhile still going and open for other job interviews. In case the last week opportunity is already gone.
1 person likes this
@Orson_Kart (8985)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
I don’t understand why your prospective employer is asking for a DBS check from your previous employer? Surely you have the official copy not them? And this is also something they can check online with your permission. Are you signed up to the DBS Update Service?
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
Hi Max I do not have a copy but my previous employer is partnered with a 3rd party group for their staff DBS. I had access with it before with the staff email but since I resigned I lost access to my staff email. The new employer seems to be cutting cost. I believe DBS should be done by prospective employer. On the upside my manager finally replied and said she would ask HR if they can still provide them for me. I work in healthcare so I would need the enhanced DBS I tried to get it on my own but can’t.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
@Orson_Kart It is really annoying specially cause I know how long it takes for them to do this as well.
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
@flapiz Isn’t it annoying that other people seem to have control over your life. People who don’t care about you, but can affect your wellbeing massively. If I ruled the world, all this would stop.
1 person likes this
@rakski (163785)
• Philippines
20 Aug
I think you should call her
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
I did and though she did not answer the phone call she replied on the next day.
1 person likes this
@rakski (163785)
• Philippines
22 Aug
@flapiz That's good to know!!
@RasmaSandra (101916)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
19 Aug
That is frustrating and since you need the job I suggest you call her directly and see how that goes,
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
Hi Rasma I tried calling her yesterday as per mylot friends suggestions. Although she did not pick up the call she finally responded to my message.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
@RasmaSandra well it will probably take another week. My old company’s HR is not the fastest.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (101916)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
20 Aug
@flapiz so is everything all right then?
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Aug
Hope the new job comes through and that you can get in touch with your previous employer,
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
I did another interview yesterday and have a trial shift tomorrow.
@birjudanak (14269)
• India
20 Aug
This is something which not like me too. They do it because they not want you move somewhere else. Everywhere they are same as we leave they behave sudden like they don't know us or we did something wrong. Hope you get it early.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
Yeah I feel like she has a grudge cause I left. As she relies on me a lot. But I had to as my husband needed to relocate.
@Shiva49 (28831)
• Singapore
19 Aug
It is unprofessional not to respond at all. Times are hard everywhere now. I wish you luck too.
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
She finally did respond and forwarded my request to HR.
1 person likes this
@nawala123 (25036)
• Indonesia
19 Aug
Hopefully she respond you soon
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
She did the day after I posted my rant. Thank you.
1 person likes this
@nawala123 (25036)
• Indonesia
21 Aug
@flapiz hopefully you get it
@valherma00 (6128)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
20 Aug
a week is really a maximum time, i feel, no matter how busy you are. i don't sometimes feel comfortable calling people so i would write another email but this time to a secretary perhaps (or to official email address of your previous workplace) and once again to this employer. i'm sorry for this treatment, it is really unfair. also, this dbs check, why is it connected to your previous employer. here, when we need it for a job, we contact ministry of police, then courts online and we get this paper in a day;all our criminal background. also, i hope a future employer will understand your situation and this troubles me, i hope a trial shift is paid there. here, for some jobs, they wanted me to do that but for me, it's exploiting thing and not sure it's legal but many go around the law. for me, every job should be paid from day 1 and training should also start from day 1. good luck, fingers crossed
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
20 Aug
Hello Valentina thank you for your empathy. I am the same as you I am more comfortable with written communication and also I like that there is an email trail so things discussed does not get omitted. I called her yesterday and she did not pick up but she did answer me today. I wanted to just pay for my own DBS check but because I work in healthcare I needed an enhanced one and I can’t seem to find one online as mostly it is done by employers. Unfortunately trial shifts is 1 week unpaid. It kinda feels like slavery but on the upside I can get to learn the job before I sign anything. Things are looking up I hope.
1 person likes this
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
25 Aug
@flapiz yes, and it slavery. can't believe they are doing it out there as well. i am glad she finally responded to you. reall, wa she out of this planet or something i also hope things will change for good for you.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (42098)
• Philippines
20 Aug
It’s understandable to feel ignored when your efforts to connect with her don’t seem to go anywhere. Visiting her could help you find out if she’s actually ignoring you or if she’s just too busy to see or read your message. Seeing her in person might give you the clarity you need and help you get what you’re asking for.
• West Haven, Connecticut
19 Aug
I would try calling them directly
1 person likes this
@flapiz (24478)
• United Kingdom
21 Aug
She did not answer the call but she did reply to my message the next day.
1 person likes this
• Northampton, England
19 Aug
A.I can create those emails