I Am The MIsfit Of The Family.

@Chevee (5905)
United States
December 31, 2008 9:31am CST
We were at a family gathering the other day and one of my relatives was there from another state. This family member has 3 other syblings. The conversation was about the new homes that her mother and one of her sisters has purchased this year, beautiful homes, they also bought new cars. Some one asked the question had they retired.? Her sister has retired because she had a job that she could retire after working 20 years. So the one that was there with us was asked if she had a job like that. She replied, "no I am the misfit in the family". I think she is doing good she is out on her on and is paying her bills and traveling at least once or twice a year. Most families have a person in it that feels as though they are not as good as the other members of the family or that the family looks down on them. Have you witness a situation like this before?
3 people like this
15 responses
@camomom (7535)
• United States
31 Dec 08
Yes, I have. I'm my families misfit. I don't work and everyone else does. We are broke and no one else is. I'm not complaining because it's our choice for me not to work but sometimes I feel like I'm looked down upon by others.
2 people like this
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
As long as you are not asking and depending on them for your welfare, I say you are doing good. Have a Happy New Year.
@camomom (7535)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I think so too.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THE BLACK SHEEP AS FAR AS MY FAMILY WAS CONCERNED. I DIDN'T PLAY BY THEIR HIPPOCRITIC WAys so i was always wrong as far as they were concerned. i'm like elvis i did it my way.
2 people like this
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
You go girl, that is the way to do it , they either take you or leave you.
1 person likes this
• United States
31 Dec 08
That misfit thing, if taken very seriously, can destroy a person! To escape the horrors it brought to my life, I opted out of my family completely about 20 years ago, and it's been a great boost. I'd honestly never been happy before, nor could I get the depression to lift, even for a while now and then. Since the toxic people are no longer able to hurt me, I love life!
1 person likes this
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I feel you, I did the same thing, I just stayed away from them.
1 person likes this
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
31 Dec 08
There is a member of my family that is like that. He has always worked and has always been responsible, but through a series of events in his life he has never bought another home, he had one in his first marriage, but the X got it. He feels like he has failed because he has had to rent ever since the divorce, and he would like to buy his current wife a house.
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I pray that someday he will be able to successfully buy a house for the two of them.
1 person likes this
@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I believe that is a common thought of some members in most families.. Every family has misfits, or ones that don't feel like they fit in.. I have always said that I must have been adopted because I don't look at life nor feel the same way as most of my sisters, but my mom assured me that I wasn't adopted.. I believe that some members of families can make other members feel inferior.. I have a sister who can do no wrong, who has done everything better than any of her other sisters, and she feels as if she is better than everyone else, she in no way makes me feel inferior, but it isn't for lack of trying on her part.. She is what she is and I am what I am, and I am happy the way that I am.. Have a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year!!
2 people like this
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
Thank You and you have a Happy New too.
@bamakelly (5191)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I think that there are misfits in almost every family. Or at least they think they are. It is kind of a shame in a way that certain people think they are the outcast or black sheep of the household. I have seen some people for myself that were treated in a certain way and it can definitely affect some for years to come. Everyone child in the family should be treated fairly.
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I agree with you. Happy New Year.
@arkansos (545)
• India
1 Jan 09
Oh my mom always keeps telling me about this one cousin of mine is in IIT(which is the premier college in India) and how well he does, how good marks he used to get. She tells me how dad is so honest and simple, while i need to spend so much money and blah blah blah. Not that U give so much as a damn, but technically I am a misfit too... Shake hands
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
1 Jan 09
Noone in my family look down on me, but I guess you could say that I am the misfit. I am the only one who does nor or have ever owned a home. Everyone is doing well, with jobs etc, I do not have a job, was laid off six months ago. I am the only one who has been divorced, so I am the only one in my family who is the only one.
1 person likes this
31 Dec 08
Hi Chevee, No I haven't come across any one like that but sometimes I do feel as thought I am the misfit of the family when we all get together, I get talked over as if they can't hear see or hear me, that is my family for you. Hugs. Tamara
1 person likes this
@ShellyB (5241)
• United States
31 Dec 08
I am the misfit in my family.For that reason I am not that close to them.I also have an aunt who thinks her kids are great and the rest of us will never messure up to them.INHO anyways
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Jan 09
I have seen this happen before, but not so much in my own family. It doesn't seem like anyone is a "misfit", as everyone in my family has their own quirks. I kinda do my own thing apart from my family, we get together, but not as much as some other families may. I do know people that see siblings on a daily basis, and that is not really how me or my spouse work.
• India
2 Jan 09
i do not feel anyone could be misfit in a family..then how come he is the member of the family.. the idea is not to feel misfit in your family & adopting ways so that one can help their family by whatever means.. someone might not be able to earn enough money for family but that does not mean that their contribution is less for the family..may be some other way they are absolutely important for family..
• India
1 Jan 09
as you yourself mentioned. most families do have members like that. so i'd say yes. even i have witnessed it with myself and siblings. my elder sister, never got a chance to get a college degree like the rest of us and so she has an inferiorty complex. however i must say she is the kindest and most sensible of all of us.
1 person likes this
@snowcat46 (2322)
• United States
2 Jan 09
I think every family has one. Either it's the one who every one looks down on, for whatever reason. Or it's the one that tries to make something of their life while the rest live off the state. Then there's the over-achievers, who have to have someone less than all the rest. A lot of people seem to feel a need to be superior to someone else. It's easier to get away with that with a family member than a friend or co-worker.
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
1 Jan 09
no, i never heard of any member in my family saying that they are the misfit of the family... we do have some family members from my father and mother side who are a misfit but they won't admit it... i think it takes lots of courage for people to be able to admit that they are the misfit of the family... take care and have a nice day...