Is it just me, or are children growing up nowadays living a sheltered life

United States
August 24, 2009 9:49pm CST
I was born in 1982, and I drank out of the hose and the tap. When I was a new born, my mother fed me when I cried for it. I didn't have to wait a year to drink cow's milk. I was spanked when I broke the rules and listened to my parents because that what kids were supposed to do. None of my friends had allergies to peanut butter or some kind of nut. We had recess at school every day for at least an hour. I was not allowed to play video games more than an hour a night, but I was usually outside playing. I didn't have a cell phone. I didn't have the internet till I was 13. When we brought our daughter home 15 months ago from the hospital, the nurse told my wife it was imperative that she ate every 2-3 hours or she wouldn't get the nourishment she needed. There is no way you could give her cow's milk and peanut butter was dangerous until she turned 1. She couldn't have a walker because they are a safety hazard. We were asked by a pediatrician how we would dicipline Jillian and I said if she breaks the rules, she will probably get a spanking, and the pediatrician looked at me like I was a murder. My wife and I are thinking we are going to have to put Jillian in a private school of some sort that will ensure she has recess and can celebrate Halloween and Christmas. I am not sure where everything got turned upside down, but kids are supposed to be kids. They are supposed to have fun and get bumps and bruises. They are also supposed to have discipline and can do what they are told without hurting their fragile personalities. It seems like the more people hover over kids and worry about anything that could bring any potential harm to them, more sheltered they will become and the more long term damage we will cause.
3 people like this
16 responses
@dorannmwin (36609)
• United States
25 Aug 09
I'm from the exact same generation that you are from. I remember being fed when I was hungry and drinking straight from the hose when we were outside playing on a hot summer day. I remember the belt and I remember what life was like before we had the internet. That said, my children are 6 and 2 years old respectively and I've tried as much as possible to raise them the way that I was raised. Yes, my children get a spanking when they need it. They had cow's milk before they were a year old as well as peanut butter and honey. They don't have nut allergies or milk intolerance. They are doing just fine. Hey, I even let my oldest go out in the front of the house and play. There are a total of 10 kids on our street and all of the parents watch out for them, so I think they are just as safe there as they would be in the back yard. My daughter goes to a public school that enforces a strict dress code, but they don't have to miss out on many of the other novelties of childhood. Their class took a field trip to the pumpkin patch last year for Halloween and will again this year as well. They had a Christmas presentation where they actually sang Christmas songs. So there are things that have changed from the time that you and I were children, but there are also many things that are very much the same. As your daughter gets a little older, you will realize that there are many people out there that want to raise their children the same way that you want to raise yours.
1 person likes this
@zoey7879 (3104)
• United States
25 Aug 09
I agree with most of this... While my child's school has rules, their political correctness has really taken away some of the fun of childhood. No Christmas, no Easter, but Cinco de Mayo shoved down her throat. She's never tried to drink from a waterhose.. In most places that I've lived, I would let her, but not here. We don't drink the city water or use it in cooking... and as sad as it is to say around here if someone didnt like you and realized you drank from the hose, there's good probability that they're going to do something very vile to that hose... Most of the kids where I live still run around barefoot most of the summer, catching toads, fishing, and riding bicycles. The kids are forced outdoors during the warmer seasons and most preteen kids don't know how to use the internet. Alot of parents, however, won't discipline their children through spankings because the local school gets VERY happy about calling CPS and making primarily false allegations. I grew up relatively sheltered (depending on how you view it) and came out fine. However, when I met a girl in high school who'd never carved a pumpkin (not even with those "safety" carving knives) because her parents were afraid of their kids getting hurt.... That just blows my mind.
@Hatley (145916)
• Garden Grove, California
25 Aug 09
hi coop well I was born in1926 and I too had a lot of the'same upbringing. but I was never spanked but I got the eye, that hurt'looking scowly face my mom used and I was brought to my senses'really quick as I did not want my sweet mom to look like'that because of me.but on the peanut butter and cows milk some childrenhave been found to be deadly allergic to these foods. nuts are really bad for some people. this is not anything to do with their upbringing I played outdoors and nine o clock was bedtime.I knew the rules and the consequences and they were dished out if I misbehaved. Things have changed since I was a kid and some things are for the better as new'things healthwise come out.we ate a pretty high fat diet and now we know that is hard on ones heart.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 09
I agree with you on health, but I think kids today are soft and parents aren't helping their kids to grow into responsible adults, they are making them dependent on someone else to make things work for them.
@MrsV163 (16)
• United States
26 Aug 09
Maybe it depends where you live ? Your community, neighborhood, etc...I have 4 children, and my husband and I handout spankings as we see fit. Their schools celebrate Halloween and Christmas every year, along with other holidays. My children appreciate all cultures, not just our own. I've never had a problem with cps or whatever they're called, people just need to mind their own business. As a child I did know a few kids that had a peanut allergy, it happens. Personally, I did give my kids formula until they turned a year old. That was my choice. When school is in session, I set a bedtime, but when it's summertime, I let them stay up as long as they like. My oldest just graduated HS, and all is well. I do it MY way..
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Aug 09
Our Government has made it possible for the busy bodies of the past to rule our lives. If you discipline your child in a way they do not like you will be punished. I say no to my kids, they have chores, they play out side and they are expected to obey my husband and I. We have family members whose children do none of these things. They compliment us on how well our girls behave and how good their manners are but when they ask how we do it are appalled that I make them help with the dishes and clean their room. spankings are not something that happen often because they know they will happen, if they are that bad. Time outs are used and yes they are sent to their rooms when needed. I say no all the time and yes I make them earn money to get the toys they want when there is no holiday. They help and elderly lady down the street with her gardening and dusting (they are 10 & 8), they also pet sit for neighbors and I am proud to say that on their own decided to help pay for their dance classes this last month. Many families no longer do these things and their kids are monsters, rude disrespectful, no manners not to mention the things they do! The parents who let them get away with this stuff should be the ones looked at for abuse because we the tax payers will be caring for their kids later on when they are arrested because they do not know any better then to do what ever they want.
@tintukm (1084)
• India
28 Aug 09
The life passes on and on,we move forward and thus the children are the one's whom we have to give a good future life.The responsibility as a parent increases day by day and it marks the rise of a good parent when he/she is concerned for his child Giving whatever the children need,are provided depending on our status,and also the limitations of ours put a tag to it.Just always worrying about them will make the life filed with hick ups and u turns all the way,teaching the importance of reliability is very important as far as giving advices are concerned.
• United States
26 Aug 09
It does seem that many children are sheltered. Part of this is because times are changing. It isn't safe to allow children the freedom to explore anymore. The baby boomers are known for raising children who are dependent, so we are probably now seeing these grown-ups raise their children the same way. Child-rearing takes practice, and all parents have to decide what is necessary protection and what is over-protective.
@bigplay (212)
• United States
25 Aug 09
Yeah i know what you mean, i didn't have internet til 1999, i think as technology becomes more and more advanced these things will happend.
• United States
25 Aug 09
I was born in 1970 and grew up overseas in europe. I have never been spanked, my parents just gave me the look and have only been grunded once - I grew up with a somewhat frugal lifestyle (which I highly appreciate today) - drank out of the hose also, I didn't have a cellphone or internet access either til I became an adult. I went to a public school also with somewhat poor teachers or at least my math teacher was. In regards to spanking, it is something I seriously don't believe in, and in my opinion it should be against the law. There are so many ways we as parents can raise our kids and teach them to be good kids and polite without having to hurt them. I believe kids needs to learn by experience within limitations of course. In regards to feeding babies, I believ our food nowadays doesnt have right amount of vitamins and nourishments due to all the polution (spelling ?) which is also why allergies is becomming a comon health issue for many people.
@cher913 (25897)
• Canada
25 Aug 09
i think you are absolutely right. no longer can kids enjoy recess and just be kids, no longer can a teacher give a hug to an injured child at school, no longer can a child fail at school because 'it will damage their psyche. its a sad time to be a child.
@trisha27 (3505)
• United States
25 Aug 09
I too was born in 1982 and I would have to agree with you on how things have changed so much sense then. Were kids at the age of 5 are getting cell phones and asking for laptops and stuff like that. And also now even if you spank your children you will have child protective services coming to your house. So yes things have changed tremendously since then. I grew up in a house where I got spankings as well when I broke the rules, played outside during the day and on the weekend we played outside in the dark. We always had a bed time. We always played with barbies and toy trucks and then I didn't start using the internet until I was 14 and didn't have my own computer until I was 18. I didn't have my own cell phone until I was 20. Todays society is having our children not only so sheltered but also growing up way too fast. Id have to agree, its time to let them just be kids for awhile.
@mommaj (22628)
• United States
25 Aug 09
HAHAHA. AMEN. The worst part is it is two generations of doing this. It started in the 80's, if not a little before. The people in congress have to earn their keep by making up laws. We have to suffer for their boredom. Most of the children that get taken away from parents should be in parents homes. The children that are in parents' homes should be taken away. If you are stuck in the middle it's no fun for anyone. It's just like all the safety warnings. Are they really necessary. How stupid do you have to be to see steam coming off of coffee and not know it's hot? Let's say your blind. How are you going to read the warning label of the coffee? This is what our world has turned into. It's a little ironic if you think about it.
@syankee525 (6298)
• United States
25 Aug 09
yeah kids these days are so different then when i was growing. kids are allow to get away much more. they are rude, ill manner. but parnets are told spanking is wrong it's abusing your kids. no it's call punishment. i am glad my kids are grown up now, i was very strict on my two kids. i even took them to the police station myself because they were playing with matches.
@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
25 Aug 09
I had my first child in 1991 and they told me to only give him mild (formula) until the doctor told me different. When I was a baby my mother feed me from day one. The doctor told me it was because it would make the baby fat and then make him be a fat child and adult. Let me tell you I fed him and now he is 18 and weights about 120 pounds. He is 5 foot 8 does that sound fat to you.
@benny128 (3624)
25 Aug 09
I totally agree with you kids are sheltered far too much now a days. There is so much red tape and advice and you must do this and you must do that etc etc I am a single dad of 3, and I try and give my kids abit of slack, when I was a kid there was none of this anti bacterial gel, I shudder when I think of what I used to pick up and eat lol, I know times change and the world is a lot different to when I was a kid, but kids are kids fearless and just want to explore accidents do happen but I would rather accidents happen now so that they learn for the future and build up a strong immune system from being in contact with bugs and illnesses.
@webearn99 (1744)
• India
25 Aug 09
I am with you on this. Life was not as easy as what kids are having these days. We did have desires, some reasonable and some outlandish and could only ask. Our job ended there. To give or not was the parents prerogative and their judgment, in retrospect, was perfect. Throwing a tantrum for something was always tempered by the memory of the smarting whack from the last time. Law and the social norm for prevention of cruelty to children is necessary, but the way it puts a parent in bind is unreasonable. We did not come off any worse for all the punishment we got. I am in fact thankful for it. Knowing myself, I would have been a rouge and a rebel, if not for the discipline I got. A small amount of pain then, has made me a man enough to face the world with a good amount of strength. With all the restrictions on parents, I see the children intent on getting their way rather. They are bound to face hardship when they fail. It pains me to think of the hurt they will face then. Hopefully, I will be there to support them. There is no doubt about that! I also have this resentment for having been under the command of my parents and when I had my children, under theirs. When will I be in charge?
• United States
25 Aug 09
I agree with you completely. But, in this world now, in this society, I haven't been able to do with my own child as I hoped and planned to do. I have had CPS called on me SEVERAL times, for everyday bumps, scrapes and bruises, and also for spanking my child. I GOT SPANKED as a child and I grew up fine! I also drank cows milk immediately after being brought home from the hospital, because my family couldn't afford fancy formulas. I gave my child cows milk and also goats milk at the age of 4 months, and she is fine. But, I got CPS called on me for that as well. Whatever happened to a parents right to do as they wish, within reason, with the upbringing of their child? My child has discipline problems, and she doesn't eat right. And, Im convinced its because of all the nosy people in society that are convinced that raising children "old school" is wrong.......Good luck with yours. And happy mylotting!