does long distance romances work?

@kylanie (1205)
United States
October 14, 2009 6:58am CST
My son likes girl that lives in Georgia and I was wondering what youre all opinion was because we are supposed to go down there in the spring and summer for them to be together he actually met her on a date site and they have talked every day on the phone and they talk for about a hour or two and he says she makes him happy and she helps him with things. So I was wondering should I encourage the relationship or be evasive?
1 person likes this
27 responses
• Indonesia
14 Oct 09
Well, I'm a living proof that long distance romance does work. BUT, I personally wouldn't encourage or suggest it to everyone. It will work only if both of them have a strong commitment and are super faithful to each other, otherwise this kind of relationship is really prone to fail. Well, let me tell you about my story. Me and my husband (was to be bf) live in different province which was about 4 hours flight. We only met once a year, and it was depressing. But we finally make it after 3.5 years and tied the knot last year. We were still apart after being married, but we managed to meet once a month or so. It's tough! How old is your son, anyway? If he's an adult I think it's really up to him. Just let him have some fun and be happy. If he sees no potential in his relationship, he'll know whether to continue or not. I think that's fully his decision. Whatever it is, I wish all of you the best! Cheers!
@agv0419 (3030)
• Philippines
15 Oct 09
I think you should support your son if that makes him happy. Long distance relationship sometimes always be a failure but there's a possibility that it will going to work out.
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@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
15 Oct 09
I think some of those long distance relationships do work out and last. I think they eventually have to get closer to one another to make it last until the end though. I would let them give it a try.
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@shadow41 (2356)
• Philippines
15 Oct 09
I guess. But it didn't work for me. We split with my long time girlfriend. Main reason is distance. We're too far from each other and we start having fights which is difficult because we can't comfort each other. Physical presence is really important in a relationship. Well that's only my opinion from a personal experience. Plus we're too young back then. :) Good day to you. shadow41
@Weizen (145)
• China
15 Oct 09
About this ,I want to tell you .I have a smiliar experience, I love my gf ,but she live far away from me ,becasue we live so far ,so she come up with the breaking with me ,now I still miss her ,so if you think your son like her ,and you think thsi girl is suit for your son ,you should help him, but if you think this love is not success ,I think you should pursude your son give up this .after all .in the future ,he 'll more sad for this .so I advcie ,you could talk with your son .and you shoudl know his thought ,so according his thought ,you know what you should do ,I think you don't want to see your son sad ,alrgiht ? so you should know more about this ,so you could know how to do this for this relation
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@taztheone (1726)
• India
15 Oct 09
According to me, Long distance relations won't work beyond a limit. I have seen many such incidents, this is because human mind's biggest weakness is love & we tend to move towards a place where we feel that we are getting a better love. Happy Lotting
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@offlimits (601)
• Philippines
15 Oct 09
Long distance relationships may or may not work. I believe it only depends on the two persons who love each other to make it last. As for your son's case, I would say that you try to encourage the relationship. It was your son's choice to be in a relationship which he know that is risky for the both of them. I think that would only prove that he really like this girl, and if they can handle it right long enough, the relationship would become stronger despite of boundaries and distance.
• Philippines
15 Oct 09
i have to say it really depends on the parties involved. a lot are into this internet dating sites, social networking sites, etc. i have seen a lot of my friends marrying their chatmates. on the other hand i have also seen some of them failed in their marriages. it is really a lot of sacrifice for both parties. both need to be faithful, patient, committed and enduring to make the relationship work. if i were in that relationship, i surely would exert efforts to make it work as it would really pain me if it fails, especially if i love and want to be with the guy. support whatever ur son likes to do.
@wahmivy (778)
• Philippines
15 Oct 09
Like with all relationships, this really depends on the individuals involved. Naturally, long distance romances bring forth more issues to work past, but if two people are committed to making a relationship work, then they have a better chance at a successful relationship that two people who may live near each other, but are not willing to exert effort to make it work.
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• United States
15 Oct 09
I don't really think it is up to you anyway - although that depends on their age, of course! I met my husband in an online group (not a dating site, just a particular interest group)and we talked online for probably about a year and a half - graduation from talking online in the group to talking privately. I eventually went to meet him but my Dad came with me for the vacation, and because I don't think you should ever meet a man you meet online alone. We have now been married five years, and when me met I lived in England and he lived in America (we now live in America) So yes, it can work. Having said that, make sure he knows what he wants before a big move. I hate living in America and would give anything to go 'home', but I also believe I was right to marry my husband. If you are going to do it you need to be sure and know them well enough (same as any decision of that kind, but a bit more!!)
• Canada
14 Oct 09
I'v been in a few long distance relationship that havnt worked but that doesnt mean this one wont work the best thing is to support your son no matter what as long as he's happy becuase that is what every mother wants for their child if he gets hurt its inevitable everyone gets hurt when it comes to relationships it cant be avoided. i think you should do your best to support him.
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@happy6162 (3011)
• United States
14 Oct 09
I have not ever been in a distance romance. I think you should just let them alone and decide for themselves if it is going to work out. If they ask you for an opinion on something then you can give your advise. I have known some people who were in long distance romance and some have made it and they got married and now it is not long distance anymore. Then there was one that did not work because the girlfriend like to party to much and was always out when the boyfriend called so the boyfriend went to visit and guess what the girlfriend did not want to see him.
1 person likes this
14 Oct 09
through mine and my freinds experiances in long distence relationships, i would have to say that it can be more hassle than its worth, i suggest you be evasive and let it unravel, maybe see if your son doesnt seem enthusiastic about it later through there 'relationship'. It would also be good if he see's her like a day out for example before hand. it all falls down to it makes your son happy, and i would want my son to be happy, so go ahead and encourage it, just dont push too much...
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14 Oct 09
Well, when it comes to romances, actually a lot of unexpected things can happen within seconds. =) And about the long distance one, I know a lot of people who successfully defended their long distance relationship and live happily ever after at the end. It's just how loyal you are to keep your own relationship, neither about far nor close. I believe there are a lot of couples who ended their relationship even they used to live together.
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• United States
14 Oct 09
I am in a long distance relationship myself. For my girlfriend and I, everything is working out so far. We get to see each other about every 3 months. I hope it lasts, but eventually one of us will have to compromise. What I mean is that one of us is going to have to choose to live where the other one lives if we want to take our relationship to the next level. As for your son's situation, I see no harm in letting him go and see her in the spring/summer. I am assuming they have never met face to face before. They should have a chance to do so and spend time together. Only then will they know if they are right for each other.
@cheenlly (3485)
• Philippines
14 Oct 09
It will work if both of them make it work and most importantly if they truly love each other. I am also in a long distance relationship and i am miles away from my fiance. We are two years in the relationship and soon we are going to get married. One thing i could only say is that there's nothing wrong if they have long distance relationship as long as they both fell in love with each other because their love to each other will hold on no matter what. No matter how far they are they will still end up with each other if they truly love each other and that's if they really meant with each other. That's a wonderful feeling seeing your son happy. My fiance and i are longing with each other because of the distance and its really difficult but in due time the sadnesss,the longingness will be over once we are together forever. So as for your son's case, let him be for what he is feeling right now. You can give advice and guide him but the best thing you can do is be happy for him. Have a nice day!
@angelajoy (1840)
• Philippines
14 Oct 09
If the relationship makes him happy, then I say let him do it. As long as it does not harm him it's fine. I don't really like long-distance relationships, but every person has his or her own likes and dislikes, and if they are both willing to make their relationship work no matter how far apart they are from each other, then let them.
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@saisakth (77)
• India
14 Oct 09
hi friend , from my side its work like that .. so go on ..
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• Philippines
14 Oct 09
hi there, First you should consider how old is your son. A parent should as much as possible avoid intruding into the private lives of their children especially if they can think for themselves. It's really not your problem whether he prefers long or short distance relationships as long as it will not harm him. People grow and mature with any kind of relationship anyways.
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@Craicha (801)
14 Oct 09
for me it works i too in a long dstance relationship...
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• United States
14 Oct 09
I have never had a long distance relationship before so I can't really say from experience. I have heard from others that it usually doesn't work. I know that it has worked for some but most of the time it doesn't work out. If the only time they are going to see each other is some during the spring and some during the summer then it might not work. I'm not saying that it definitely won't but I would think they would want to be with the person they are dating and share lots of time with them. If your son really likes the girl then you could encourage it and if it doesn't work out then you don't feel bad and if it does work out then you will feel like you were there for your son regardless.
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