would you re-marry your ex to donate an organ?

@SomeCowgirl (32273)
United States
November 25, 2012 9:53am CST
I was watching my SBTV and a video came up about a lady in China who was a match to her ex-husband who needed a liver transplant because he had cancer. She offered to donate but in China you have to be married to donate, so they renewed their vows and she underwent two surgeries. I think that is pretty amazing and a real example of love and charity. Would you remarry an ex if you were a match and they needed an organ or part of an organ? I would, you can always get annulled.. but hey, maybe they'll work things out again, huh?
4 people like this
13 responses
@Asylum (45474)
• Manchester, England
25 Nov 12
It seems quite bizarre that only a spouse is permitted to donate an organ, especially considering that the spouse may not be a compatible donor in many cases. It would be a very difficult decision to make, whether to remarry someone who you previously has reason to divorce and also donate an organ or sit back and allow someone you had cared for so long to simply die. I doubt if I can guess at what my choice would be in such circumstances.
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
Well I think had his family been a match they could have done it for him. It does seem a weird law though as I wonder if a friend could donate or would they have to marry the friend to help? If this scenario were to be between me and my ex I would remarry to help, and I'd hope he'd do the same. I like to think he would, he's not a bad person, but as you say you just never know what one will choose. In the case of the blurb I watched, they had divorced over arguments to do with their business.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (86307)
• Marion, Kansas
25 Nov 12
Maybe they would find that a good life was more important than a business.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
GG, I sure hope so. It's sad to hear about divorces even though they happen every day, maybe even more often then a marriage. I know if I had the last few months prior to my own separation to live again I would, and I'd do things much differently. I suppose I'll always miss my ex, though I understand we are apart now, and it doesn't hurt anymore.
@Canellita (12061)
• United States
25 Nov 12
That is pretty amazing! She is obviously a very generous and compassionate person. I can't believe in China she had to be married to him in order to be able to donate. What is the purpose of that? I remember another story that aired on TV a while back where one spouse had cancer and in order to get the treatment that was needed the couple had to divorce.
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
Yes, I think laws get in the way a little too much. I don't know that I've heard about the one who had to divorce but it sounds somewhat familiar. It's sad that people have to do things like that, I couldn't describe the feeling if I had to divorce a spouse to help them or for them to help me. I'd just feel lost.
• United States
26 Nov 12
I can't say that I am in the same situation, but with any of my former partners, I would be willing to get "married" in order to donate an organ, as long as I'm not legally married to someone else.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
27 Nov 12
Well that is great to hear. I know a lot of times people part ways and not in good terms. It makes it difficult especially with laws like China has. I'd hope they'd review the law and change it.
• United States
27 Nov 12
Even if I don't want to be with that person any longer, I don't want him to die. To me, that is the humane thing to do.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
27 Nov 12
Yes I know that though I may be very scared, I'd still do it if I could. Of course my ex and I are atleast on speaking terms lol.
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
I believe that a good person would do anything to help a person in need especially when he/she sees that he/she is the only hope at the moment. This story is really a great example of love and human's capacity to do good things. I really can't say if I would be able to do the same, for two reasons, one, I have never have an ex so I do not know how that would feel as emotions play a great role in decision making, second, I am scared of operations and have never experienced any major operations in a hospital, but all I can be sure of is that when the situation comes that is really the only time I could probably answer the question.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
I have also never had an operation and I am sure I'd really fear it, but I'd do what needed to be done, atleast I think I would. The video I saw was a great show of love and charity and just what the heart is capable of.
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
28 Nov 12
I have given it more thought and I think that if that ex is someone who still matters to me and someone I still care for, then I'd probably be okay with it, the operation and all. Love is cannot do everything but it can really make you do things you never know you would or could.
@youless (83750)
• Guangzhou, China
26 Nov 12
I remember I read this news but I can't remember the details. I think they just made a mistake to get divorced. It could be an arguments or something like that. You know sometimes when we are angry, we will make something stupidly. This is why she wanted to get married with her ex-husband so that she could donate an organ for him. It was a touching story. I am glad to see this story has a happy ending.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
27 Nov 12
They had a business together and divorced because of differences in opinion there. I think it's great that she did get re-married to him. I didn't read to see if they were going to keep together or not, but it shows great love and devotion to remarry for that.
@chiyosan (29390)
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
oh wow, maybe if i am still free and if it can be sure that he is to be cured or to be well, then that meant that i might sacrifice and help him out for old time's sake.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
26 Nov 12
Yes it would be hard if you were already remarried or just seeing someone else. Though it's sad that someone may not get surgery they need because of a stupid law.
@celticeagle (109429)
• Boise, Idaho
26 Nov 12
Why not? I means its a liver! I would want to be close and in the know on my liver if at all possible. There must be a good reason why these two became ex's in the first place. Is this something they can get around or not? And who says they have to live together when they marry?
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
26 Nov 12
They divorced over fights because of their business. Who knows, they may just go their separate ways, divorce again eventually, or it could be a rekindling. Either way I think the law is ridiculous.
@cutepenguin (6458)
• Canada
25 Nov 12
I don't know. There is no such law here -organ matching and donation is up to the doctor - so I'm sure I would not have to decide such a thing. I'd probably do it, though, because a life is more important than some paperwork.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
26 Nov 12
The law I find to be ridiculous and a waste of time. If a person really needs an organ, they can't go through the rigamarole of a marriage or re-marriage. Here it's the same, whoever matches, married or not.
@GardenGerty (86307)
• Marion, Kansas
25 Nov 12
I probably would, if I was not married again to someone else. I think this unselfish act could be enough to make people look at each other differently.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
This is true, I hadn't thought about those who are already remarried. I would not want to be living in China and needing an organ only an ex could donate, especially if he or I were re-married. It is a charitable act, and a great one, I just hope China re-thinks their laws.
@sid556 (31019)
• United States
25 Nov 12
Yet another stupid law! Sure I would marry my ex again in order to save his life. I'd probably marry anyone if it meant it would save their life. If we had such a ridiculous law here in the States, I would hope the people would all do whatever it took to get that law changed.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
The law would need to be changed because honestly I think a lot of people wouldn't remarry just for that.. There are plenty of people in this world (in the States) who still love their exes, but even so I don't know that they'd remarry them. It is a stupid law, a law that takes time, precious time. It's great they had time to remarry and then do the surgery, but in some cases it's not the case.
@subhojit10 (7384)
• India
25 Nov 12
Thanks a ton for sharing this discussion. Hey i am so much touched with this story and serious that lady is great that she is doing such a pious job of donating her organ and marrying again. I think this is an exemplary story and she will definitely set an example for our society. At a time when people are reluctant to donate their eyes even this news will come as big surprise and i hope it inspires people to donate their organs to the needy ones. What say?
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
25 Nov 12
I am not sure if she stayed married to him, but I imagine she may have. The news blurb didn't specify on it. I think it's great and that it should touch the hearts of people and if they can't / won't donate an organ, to atleast donate blood, money, or time, especially this time of year.
@asliah (11149)
• Philippines
12 Dec 12
hi, for me if that will happen to me i think i can marry again my ex to donate my organ or to donate his organ to me,the feeling is not that important because we need to save life of other,but sharing of organs can lead also for a good relationship.
@JenInTN (27568)
• United States
27 Nov 12
She is certainly a better person than me. It makes me feel kind of bad really because to be honest..I don't think I would do it. At least not for one of mine. Now, like you said, they may work things out. She may have loved that man more than anything. It was certainly a selfless act.