Are half brother and sisters, real brother and sisters?  |
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  This has be nagging at me. My son is 15. My daughter is 2. They have different dad's. While have a chat with my son he told me that his dad said his sister is real not his sister because she is only his half sister. My son got upset and told him she was his sister. We both came from the same place mom. My other son who is 13 lives with his dad. Now he is teaching this to him. Do you think after hearing years of this crap put in your head a person could possible believe it? It it seems to me if he were getting it drilled in his head day after day he might really think she is not his sister and treat her different. I can not believe my ex told my kids this. I was raised you were all brothers and sisters even if you were only half of mom. I think this is ignorant.It breaks my heart he is teach my boys such crap. What do you think?
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1.  azkadellia (302) | 5 months ago |  Half brother and sister is considered REAL brother and sister. As far as I'm concern both are from you and they don't have the same dad's then it's real. if it was different mothers but same dad then that might be a little different. If they're not related at all and don't have the same mom OR dad then they aren't brother and sister at all they're just step.
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2.  katsmeow1213 (2199) | 5 months ago |  I agree with you. My younger siblings had a different father than I did, and I never made a big deal out of it. It was explained to me that they were my HALF brother and HALF sister, but we still lived under the same roof and were raised by the same mother.
Now my oldest child has a different father than my other children, but so far as I know, he's never even heard the word HALF sibling. I hope he never does. I too would be quite upset by what your ex is doing.
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| 3. sedel1027 (12050) | 5 months ago |  I am not from a divorced family. My husband is. His Dad has 2 kids from the second marriage that are a lot younger than my husband (he is 27 they are 9 and 6). From the first marriage there is him, 2 sisters and his brother. He didn't live with his Dad much after the 2nd marriage, maybe 2 years, and only the first half-sister was born. She adores him to death. Anyway, I don't think he necessarily views them differently but he does refer to them differently. When he explains his family he says, I have 4 sisters and a brother and two of them are from my Dad's second marriage.
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| 4. Aussiepup113 (49) | 5 months ago |  How terrible for your children to be told they are not brother and sister. Of course if they share a parent they are brother and sister. The "half" doesn't really mean anything. They still share the same mother and same genes. The term "half" is just being picky. Just continue to assure your children that they are brothers and sister. You can't do much about what their father says but you can assure them of what you believe.
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| honeydew82174 (1244) | 5 months ago | I called him and asked him about it and he hung up! He must have said it! What jerk. You can not reason with someone when they will not even hear what you have to say. I thought what ever ya jerk I will just deal with it on my own and it will bite you in the butt someday. | |
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| gtdonna (689) | 5 months ago |  I do understand how you feel, but since he hang up on you that means he do not want to discuss it. You should write him a letter and let him know that you were not pleased with what he did and ask him not to repeat it again to your son.
Your son was correct in standing up for his SISTER. proud of him. You tell your son, that both him and his sister came from you and both of them don't have half red blood and half another color...their blood is red period.
You have to also let your son knows he cna tell you ANYTHING, because as I see it, the next time his father says something he might tell the boy not to ever tell you or he will punish him if he hears it back from you. This can create fear in your son and he won't share as much what happens with him and his father anymore and you don't want that. Seems hsi dad is playing a game of "Mom is bad, I am the good one"
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| honeydew82174 (1244) | 5 months ago | I can only hope someday this mom is bad issue he is teaching the boys will back fire on him. I was told it makes kids resentful as they get older. That they love both of their parents and should not be made to feel like they have to chose between you. I am very careful what I say about their dad. I do not argue with their dad infront of them. I call when they are not here. A letter is a good Idea. It will most likely end up in the garabage. I did think I could email this disscusssion to my other son and he would understand. | |
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6.  fjgamer (371) | 5 months ago |  By definition, a sister is "a female offspring having both parents in common with another offspring; female sibling." I don't think the definition should be widened to include people who don't share the same biological parents, however, if you must justify treating them fairly, tell your son, "Don't treat her differently just because she isn't your real sister. She's your half sister, which means you should still hate her half as much at least." Joking aside, it shouldn't make any difference.
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7.  spalladino (3942) | 5 months ago |  What your ex is teaching those boys is very wrong but your son loves his sister so this ignorant man's words shouldn't have any effect on him. Terms like half sister, step brother only serve to divide siblings but it's the relationship that counts and your ex has no influence on how your children get along and feel about each other. My youngest daughter has a different father than my older three children and shortly after she was born one of them asked if she was their half sister. My response was to ask if they could point out which half wasn't their sister? They thought that was pretty funny at the time and, from that day forward, the issue of half sisters never came up again. This was and is their*sister*.
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| 8. irishidid (1387) | 5 months ago |  That's a horrible thing to do to a child. My kids are halves. The issue has never come up in any discussion because we are family. Period.
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| 9. sweetdesign (1902) | 5 months ago |  As long as one parent is shared there is a biological link making them siblings no matter what your ex tells your son. They are brother and sister. My daughter has two half siblings and while I may not like this fact that does not stop them from being her father's children and her half siblings. Your ex is cruel for telling your son that his sister is not a real sister when she most certainly is.
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| 10. cyberfluf (1726) | 5 months ago |  It's all about what people believe is real family. Yes, they are bloodrelated even though they might have a different mom or father, but that shouldn't make a difference. Especially if kids are raised in the same family and/or get in touch a lot; personally I feel that this type of banding is more important then being a blood relative. My fosterbrother came to us when he was 13 days old, he's now allmost two and we are in no way blood related, but he is my brother. Nothing more or less. He lives here, I love him dearly and he belongs to our family just as much as to his biological family. He lives here 24/7 and I wouldn't want it any other way. So to go short; half brothers and sisters are in my opinion real brothers and sisters.
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