Is it better to be a Spectator then a Player?
By zandi458
@zandi458 (28102)
Malaysia
August 14, 2009 1:41pm CST
Why can't we have some deep and thought provoking discussions here that gives us something to debate and argue in a civilized manner? I am puzzled as to what kind of topics that are safe and do not go under the chopping board of mylot? My recent discussion was deleted purportedly going against mylot guidelines. I am astonished as to how this discussion was viewed as going against mylot guidelines. I suspect it is the job of an insidious person within my friend's list who deliberately reported this discussion to the admin for reasons best known to himself. The admin will only act on reports and might not have read through the post to justify the deletion. This is an unfortunate incident as it managed to draw few responses within seconds of being posted. It would have brought out the voices of many who are more vocals on issues pertaining to the subject.
I am running out of steam and would not think of anything to write again as it would only be reported and affecting the innocent respondents to lose on their earnings. It is better to be a spectator then a player, don't you think so?
6 people like this
14 responses
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
15 Aug 09
I know exactly how u feel. I don't always understand why they choose some to delete & leave others w/foul language etc. my biggest discussion ever was deleted. Of course it was a topic on the deleteing things & they sure don't like to be critcized right or wrong. I think we should have the right to express ourselves but guess we don't U have a good one.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
15 Aug 09
U are right but doesn't mean i have to agree w/them all the time.
1 person likes this
@anotherxidentity (1434)
• United States
14 Aug 09
The thing is a lot of people on mylot do report because they don't like a conversation and therefore they just want to be jerks and get it deleted. Now sometimes its not the actual discussion that makes it get reported sometimes its one of the replies that maybe you didn't get the chance to read before the discussion got deleted. Therefore sometimes its better to be the spectator because you have less of a chance of getting a lot more of your earnings taken away because of what someone else decides to posts, whereas if you are the player you get the chance to start these discussions.
Now I wish mylot had the system where if it was a reply that was reported only the reply would get deleted but it hasn't come to that yet.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
That is exactly what am trying to say. There is a lot of risks when you are a player. When discussions get deleted the respondents automatically gets affected and I don't feel good inside. Being a spectator, you are only to answer for yourself and response to where you think you can relate well. Responsibility is lighter. 
@anotherxidentity (1434)
• United States
15 Aug 09
There are even downfalls to trying to help people here on mylot. I know sometimes when I come across a discussion that is against the TOCs - like talking about how much you think you earn per post etc. and you try to explain to them the ballpark range but how they shouldn't post those types of discussion your time gets deleted and there isn't a reward. Kind of why I wish mylot had a system to send messages without being a person's friend so therefore you could tell them privately and not have to post in the discussion which looks bad on your behalf -but even that has its downside with spammers looking for referrals hassling everyone and their sister.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
15 Aug 09
zandi,i really donot understand some of the guidelines of mylot but it is always better to be a player,my hands and feet(and GOK only knows what else icth)when i watch something being played by anybody..nowdays,i donot get time to start a discussion,so there is no danger of them being deleted.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
21 Aug 09
I was about to respond to that discussion from my email (as I usually do) and was astonished to find it deleted. I re-read the discussion and found nothing wrong with it at all. Perhaps the discussion previous to that one may have been dubious as it drew attention to a myLot failing and so perhaps both discussions were mixed up and the wrong one deleted. That's the only thing I can come up with zandi. What a bother.
1 person likes this
@tundeemma (894)
• South Africa
15 Aug 09
yes it is ideal to some extent to remain spectator on some issues but some issues are too important to be left out and that is when one must talk or respond otherwise one will be relegated to the background, life is such a funny place where it can throw anything at you
1 person likes this
@IMEzekieL (498)
•
16 Aug 09
I think I'll be a spectator first to learn lessons from the players. At least I'll have a basic knowledge or perhaps strategies before I'll become a player.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
That defeats the whole purpose of having a healthy debate. It can be hotly debated but at the end of the day everyone should adjourn with a handshake. The only thing to remember is not to turn this site into a battlefield of offensive words as the weapon to outwit the other.
@mysdianait (66005)
• Italy
14 Aug 09
I have never played much unless my temper flares about some particular guideline or other and then I start off with one of 'those' discussions. I have always been more of a spectator as there is a lot to watch. Even while I'm writing this I can see my posts going down... Seems that a huge clean-up is underway in the last few days. Not before time but heck, that many posts? 
I still can't think for the life of me why that one went earlier. I was looking forward to seeing how it developed too.
I still can't think for the life of me why that one went earlier. I was looking forward to seeing how it developed too.@mysdianait (66005)
• Italy
14 Aug 09
It is something that haunts all of us including me Zandi. I lost one today too, THAT one. I thought it might go but in my excitement when I saw what had happened I just let flip and posted 
I am used to losing response and comments too as many of the discussions which contain queries by the new users are removed and my responses with them. Never mind, at least we try 
Pick up the pieces and carry on my friend. Your contributions are always so thought provoking that you must not stop after just one failure!
I am used to losing response and comments too as many of the discussions which contain queries by the new users are removed and my responses with them. Never mind, at least we try
Pick up the pieces and carry on my friend. Your contributions are always so thought provoking that you must not stop after just one failure!1 person likes this
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Aug 09
hi zandi I just responded to your discussion and suddenly my
point count went down, I couldnt see anything illegal in
your discussion. why? I love to make discussions but know
I cannot on not smoking or on being a democrat or not
likeing to open the door to jehovahs witnesses. those discussions
ruined my rating and mystar.so on to safe subjects.I like
your discussions as they actually make me think,not just'
put down how I prefer strawberry over cherry etc etc etc.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
14 Aug 09
So sorry that your points went down but how would I know that this discussion is not allowed here. I would have avoided posting it should I have known it is disallowed. I guess you are right, certain discussions that look innocent are doomed and affects our points when they don't meet others approval. They will just minus you if people don't favor your points of thought.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
15 Aug 09
I am just as baffled as to why such an excellent discussion would be deleted and I must confess that lately I am a little put off starting discussions and I have been having more fun responding to intelligent topics like yours and even those seem to disappear! I don’t get it...I prefer responding to starting does that make me a spectator? It is difficult enough to come up with interesting and worthwhile topics and then it is a fine line between what is allowed and what is not.
Some days it is easy to feel dejected…Sorry you lost your discussion zandi; I was going to contribute...
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
I am beginning to have this phobia of fear seeing all my discussions going to the bin. Just responding to discussions qualify you to be a spectator which I think I will eventually be one. I need to cleanse myself of this fear before I can switch to be an active player again.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
15 Aug 09
I know what you mean zandi, sometimes a break can do wonders!
1 person likes this
@kawalnarang (1095)
• Trinidad And Tobago
14 Aug 09
U cannot change them,,,,,,,just smile and move on,,
@akuler (3531)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
Hi zandi,
I am not sure which discussion you mean and I also don't know if I had my response on it. I am sure that I am not the one who reported it since I never done it before.
Some serious discussion tend to get some provoking responses. In this case, some people here didn't like it. Just like in our real life, not all of us can accept certain provocation. A few of us would take it badly and start lost our mind.
I would like to join the serious discussion but I would definitely go away if I see someone start say something in bad and in a bad intention. Some of us would rather talk about the negative side then the positive side. They try to look for the wrong then the right. It is normal.
Since we all aware of the guidelines, we should prepared ourselves to lose some earning from that type of discussion.
Happy mylotting and have a nice evening.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
The title of the discussion was 'are men necessary?' I am not sure whether you have responded to it. Before I could give my comments it was deleted within minutes after a person put an unkind remarks to me. Well this is the name of the game and am actually immune to it. But am saddened why this newly acquired friend is behaving abnormally and should understand that it is an honest and harmless discussion. Definitely someone here needs spanking and to put cello tape over his mouth. 'Bukan tidak biasa kena tengking selalu'. Aramaittii!!
1 person likes this
@akuler (3531)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
I don't think I gave my response to that one. I really don't understand why he/she have to respond on it and then reported it. Its totally unnecessary.
If we don't like the discussion, why on earth we want to respond. Just leave it there. Unless is about racism and against the guidelines, I can't see the why we should reported it.
It is very unpleasant thing to see a good discussion gone because one person disagree with it. Discussion by meaning is also want us to talk and debated the different ideas.
1 person likes this
@sritrinity (629)
• India
14 Aug 09
You know I have been moaning and groaning about this myself on mylot. I can't find anything really stimulating to discuss, all the things I am interested in, seem to be taboo subjects on mylot. I have read so many posts about how it's not worth talking about such issues, because members abuse it. Makes me really sad! I feel in these times it's really important to bridge communication gaps with eachother, to understand one another and to learn from one another. I hate it! Today it actually made me cry, realising that I can't talk about the things that are close to my heart with my new friends in Mylot.
I have never been to America (although from the UK) and there are so many things I want to discuss with you guys!
I was going to ask today that perhaps one needs to go to another site where these discussions can be had with intelligent people.
Or can't we start some secret group or society where silly people just can't post.
It's such a shame, it's like you are all there, but all I can do is talk trivia.
What a darn shame!.....Angelie
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
Nice name Angelie and I am Angela. It would have been an interesting and a class above place if we are not dictated by the rules here and since we have to conform to certain rulings and the admin encourages members to press the report button when certain posts is against the rules of law in mylot which is fine but I strongly believe that the directive to report discussions has been abused and misused to the extend of getting many quality posts ending up in mylot bins. This is only curtailing our efforts to post quality and interesting discussions which the admin has been propagating all this while. This is a good example of double standard. It is no wonder a friend has dubbed this place as children's playground referring to some of the senseless posts being posted here which no doubt are crowd puller but definitely not my piece of meat and also not for many who are keen to read some good intellectual discussions.
It would have been an interesting and a class above place if we are not dictated by the rules here and since we have to conform to certain rulings and the admin encourages members to press the report button when certain posts is against the rules of law in mylot which is fine but I strongly believe that the directive to report discussions has been abused and misused to the extend of getting many quality posts ending up in mylot bins. This is only curtailing our efforts to post quality and interesting discussions which the admin has been propagating all this while. This is a good example of double standard. It is no wonder a friend has dubbed this place as children's playground referring to some of the senseless posts being posted here which no doubt are crowd puller but definitely not my piece of meat and also not for many who are keen to read some good intellectual discussions.@sritrinity (629)
• India
15 Aug 09
Hi Angela, do you know of any other forums where CONSTRUCTIVE debating actually takes place? Perhaps sharing the frustration will lighten the load abit and it also gives the benefit of experience to us newbies. Angelie
1 person likes this
@LetranKnight25 (33117)
• Philippines
14 Aug 09
I don't mind being a spectator, because i had been spectating my whole life, before i start being, oh, wait when the heck i became a player
. if i were you just keep of responding until you get another idea for posting a new topic. i don't want any of those debatable discussions, no way
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 Aug 09
You maybe a spectator but no doubt a good player too. I can see the good balance of your activities here with so much of quality inputs. Though you are the latest addition to my list but you have shown your supports in ways that I can't have enough words to express how thankful I am.
@mysdianait (66005)
• Italy
14 Aug 09
I have been asked to give you a spanking
by a young lady who has gone to work 
You should be asleep it seems! 
You should be asleep it seems! @LetranKnight25 (33117)
• Philippines
14 Aug 09
and for the deleted post, that's the mylot facts of life..just simply..let go and move on. before i bang up the keyboard and slap the monitor
if that happened..relax