Son Speaks his Mind - Not very nice, but FUNNY AS ---!
By Raven7317
@Raven7317 (691)
United States
September 14, 2009 1:34pm CST
My son is 4 years old, very smart and very curious. He's also very outspoken...
Yesterday, I was playing with him outside on the sidewalk, we were playing with trucks, digging in a pile of sand, having a grand ole time for ourselves. My neighbor, who I used to be very close with, comes out with her almost 4 YO.
Now, to understand this, you have to know that my neighbor's child is the most spoiled, most ill-behaved, most brattiest kid I ever did see! (Hence, "used to be close to")
So they come over and her son immediately tries to take the shovel away, keeps dumping over a bucket my son is filling, starts screaming blood murder, and just generally being a beast child! Now, normally, my son would just give him the toys to keep him quiet - seriously! But yesterday, he wasn't in the mood and looked at my neighbor and says, "Auntie, just take him in the house!"
I was immediately horrified, because I never heard my son be rude like that, but I was also LMAO (inside) because how much more truthful can a situation be assessed??
A 4 YO child doesn't want anything to do with another 4 YO! Natrually, she was offended, prob had her feelings hurt, but I couldn't help it! It was funny as heck!
Later, like a proper parent should, I explained to my son that although it's okay to speak your mind, you have to take care not to hurt anyone's feelings. Explained about being patient with other children, and explained about being nice even if someone else isn't.... I did this because it's the right thing to teach my son, but I still couldn't help laughing with DH about it.
Anyone ever feel this way/experience this???
4 people like this
12 responses
@LilyoftheThorns (12918)
• United States
14 Sep 09
First of all, I have to say that if he usually just shares his toys to keep the other child quiet it shows his level of maturity already, and at such a young age! And maybe what your son said would be a hint to yoru neighbor that her child shouldn't be allowed to act that way.
If I had a kid I would never let them act like spoiled brats! It sounds like your son has a much better attitude!
I'm glad that he didn't get in trouble for what he said, and that you just sat him down and talked to him (good thinking mom!) :)
@LilyoftheThorns (12918)
• United States
16 Sep 09
That's a fair concern...but as he gets older you can make sure he understands what it means to stand up for himself and not let people always get what they want from him. But he did take initative when he told your neighbor to take the other boy into the house lol! Good for him :D
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Hi Lily, thanks for the response... yOu know, I worry about my son too because of his good natured ways... I worry that he will be taken advantage of, that he will be viewed as a push over, that he will be used because he is so good hearted. One one hand, he shows that he is willing to share, that he wants to play, share, be friends and avoid unneccesary confrontations... But on the other hand, he won't stick up for himself... I worry about this...
He will actually give up HIS OWN TOYS to keep this child from screaming. I've seen him struggle with the issue, I've seen him give up his favorite toy/car/truck to keep this child from carrying on like a demon - and then turn away and cry because he couldn't play with his own toy. It's very hard to see, as a parent, that your four year old will give up his own happiness for another - who WOULD NOT DO THE SAME FOR HIM! When this happens, the mother does nothing. She just stands there, on one hand hoping that her child will get over it, but on the other hand, not teaching him that this behaviour is inappropriate. Sure, we both rush to tell my son what a nice boy he is, but that's no consolation to him when he sees this other Devil child getting what he wants by acting badly....
So, on this particular day, I guess he'd had enough and spoke his mind! LOL I still laugh over the thought! And, no I would never be mad at him for speaking his mind - we've always told him, he could say whatever he wanted to us, he could tell us anything - as long as he did it with respect! Thanks for your response! I do hope my neighbor gets the point!
1 person likes this
@StormWindBG (143)
• Bulgaria
14 Sep 09
I havent , but i would SOOOO laugh as well :D And before i teach the kid the lesson , id soo say "good job" too xD But ofcourse , u did a great thing man... u sound like a cool and good parent :) good job ;)
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
14 Sep 09
Thank you very much - I am a cool parent! : ) Seriously, what I told him was that although X wasn't being nice, it was not nice to speak to Auntie that way.
(He calls my neighbor Auntie cuz he couldn't pronounce her name when he was little...) DH and I got a good laugh out of it and even though I'm an adult, I still felt that very immature "HA!" well up inside me because she's always trying to sell that her child is perfect and she always has an excuse for his bad behaviour! I seriously doubt it, but I hope that in her heart of hearts, she will realize how serious the issue is when a 4 year old child can clearly see how badly her son is behaving. Thanks for the response!
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
15 Sep 09
No, it's never too late to correct a wrong! A child's life can be improved by the parent's (or any adult's) ability to be patient, understanding and persistant. Yes, there is something messed up with her child, but it's not him - it's her! A child is a person that an adult creates - therefore the child's faults are those of the parent! We were joking about it, on an adult level, but from the child's level, it's not funny. She's doing no favors to this child to give him everything he wants, to pacify him to diminish tantrums, to do whatever it takes to keep him happy... I'm not saying she's a bad person, I'm sure she's doing the best that she thinks she can... but in my opinion, adults are children formed and created by other adults... so she is creating one more adult in this world who will go about life thinking that everything should be easy, handed to him, given even if not deserved... She isn't doing anyone any favors - especially her child. No, I would say that IF she realized what she was doing, and IF she wanted to change it, she could. It would be alot harder than the way she's doing now, but it would be the most beneficial to her child's future.
@StormWindBG (143)
• Bulgaria
14 Sep 09
You're welcome :D And i hope she sees it herself too :D that theres something messed up with her kid... tho even if she does , at this point its pretty hard to try to correct his behavior , isnt it ?
@Polly1 (12644)
• United States
15 Sep 09
I have a 4 yr. old grandson who is always crscking me up. I have recently been dating, he doesn't like it. So he takes me out on dates and figures that is enough. He also say he loves me so much, he is going to mary me. He has it all worked out. His Uncle Jim is supposed to take him down to the park with his bike and scooter. He then is going to do some tricks and get some money. He needs the money so he can buy me a special marry dress and a marry flower. He is also smart becuase he says he is going to stay small so he can get the child support. Thats my boy. He is so precious to me.
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
16 Sep 09
Hi Polly, thanks for the response! How cute is your little guy - taking you on dates! A "marry dress" - how priceless!
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Ya...I have experienced this....have 4 kids. They are grown now so the experiences aren't as vivid. I don't really think your son was being rude at all. He was speaking his mind and expressing himself honestly. I actually commend him for being so honest.....from the sounds of it, the kid had it coming and if the mom was offended....so what. Where was she when her son was being a complete jerk? I really don't think your son was rude at all. He was speaking the truth and there is nothing wrong that.
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
16 Sep 09
Hi Sid, thanks for the response! Yeah, I know my son wasn't being rude or mean, but I still want him to know that it wasn't nice... An adult would have said, "wow, maybe he'd be happier playing inside" or "gee, doesn't look like he really wanted to come outside." Sure, he was honest and in an innocent was - he was completely correct! I don't care that the other lady was offended - she gets offended if I remind her child to say "please" !!! She's just the type of person who doesn't want anyone even THINKING about correcting her child OR HER!
Thanks for the support - I just keep reminding myself that they won't be around long (they have their house on the market) and once this child starts school, she'll get a much harsher wake up call from the teachers than she ever got from my 4 YO! LOL Happy mylotting!
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
14 Sep 09
Hi Raven, I don't think your son actually said anything wrong, he didn't hurl insults at the other child, just made it clear that the other childs behaviour was not acceptabe, though he should have added please on the end of course. Just because they are children doesn't mean they can't recognise bad behaviour and not want to be around it. My own son as a young toddler used to look on in horror at other infants screaming themselves purple with tantrums in shopping carts in the supermarket and amazigly I never once had to put up with a similar display, he worked out early on it wasn't the best sort of impression to make.
You did the right thing by speaking to your son as they need to be careful what they say, don't want any nasty incidents like' why has that man got hair growing out of his nose' but I'm sure when he showed his disdain it would be more effective than an adult correcting the other childs behaviour.
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
14 Sep 09
Hi Thea, .... funny you should mention the occurence of 'nasty incidents' - see my comment above... My son once commented on a fat person... In these situations, I have to think about what I have to teach him. While I don't want to squash his natural curiousity, I also want him to know that some things are better left unsaid, or at the very least, left to a private conversation!
And I'm not too sure about the effectiveness of this incident; the other mom is the type who thinks her child can do no wrong and actually responded with a dirty look! I have no doubt in my mind that she thought my child was being fresh and mean... Thanks for the response!
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
14 Sep 09
Well mines ten now and I must have taught him well because he's managed to keep his comments to himself and usually saves them until we're safely in the car.
Today he made his first out loud in hearing of the person comment and I couldn't actually blame him as my own reaction was best described by use of an expletive. I don't know whether to post it or not as it could rain controversy down on my head as not sure how the politically correct brigade might be on it. Maybe.
@gmatthews (154)
• United States
15 Sep 09
That is funny. There is something to be said for the innocence of a child. My 5 year old is constantly doing things like that to me. He isn't trying to be rude or hurtful, he just states the facts. He told me I needed to excercise more one day and at first I was hurt, but then thought to myself that he is right...I should. He also told me once that I was on the computer too much, which simply meant that he wanted my attention :)
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
14 Sep 09
hi raven7317 oh how funny and how astute,he is one'smart'cookie
that son of yours. I had to laugh until I had to run to the'
bathroom. what I experienced today was wwith an elderly brat who is'
a motormouth who started talking non stop to me this morning while'i was trying to move the mylot money from my paypal account into my
bank account and i ended up hitting the wrong buttons and transferred moneyfrom my bank into paypal,now ihave to find the right buttons and move it back.so I yelled at her will you just shut up for a momentplease. then she said sheepishly I guess I better not bother you right now. Right,I should not have talked to her that way but she just pushed me and pushed me til she made me make an error.
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
15 Sep 09
Oh that happened to me the other nite at work. I work as a cashier and this girl stood by the counter talking and talking and talking about oh i really don't know what but I tried to wait on a customer and was so distracted. he swore that he gave me a 20. and I gave him change for 10. He lived out of town and I had no way of knowing for sure until I did my drawer at the end of the nite. He was right...I owed him 10.00 and got up and had to meet him in the morning. The girl talking my ear off found this all very amusing.
she does this all the time...I need to learn to block her out.
she does this all the time...I need to learn to block her out.
@liquorice (3887)
•
15 Sep 09
Well, that was very restrained of you to explain patience to your son, and try not to hurt the other lady's feelings, despite her son snatching the toy away! 
I think I would have hoped that the other child's parent would have reprimanded him, and if not, I might have, (tactfully I hope), said something myself. I like what your son said. He sounds very wise. My daughter is also like that, she has a very strong sense of justice, and lectures people (adults as well as kids 
), on what's right and wrong!
She is also very outspoken. She's 3, and I think that 3 and 4 are definitely the age for it. The other day we were in a coffee shop and she asked me in a loud voice why the lady had spots on her face. I was very embarrassed and explained to her quietly that people don't like you talking about spots on their faces, and if the lady hears people talking about it, it might make her sad. I think she understood, but you just never know when other things like this are coming! 
I think I would have hoped that the other child's parent would have reprimanded him, and if not, I might have, (tactfully I hope), said something myself. I like what your son said. He sounds very wise. My daughter is also like that, she has a very strong sense of justice, and lectures people (adults as well as kids ), on what's right and wrong!
She is also very outspoken. She's 3, and I think that 3 and 4 are definitely the age for it. The other day we were in a coffee shop and she asked me in a loud voice why the lady had spots on her face. I was very embarrassed and explained to her quietly that people don't like you talking about spots on their faces, and if the lady hears people talking about it, it might make her sad. I think she understood, but you just never know when other things like this are coming! 
@hotsummer (13919)
• Philippines
15 Sep 09
when a child is bad or rude. it is still funny. as long as the rudeness is not directed at me. anyways, sometimes when the kid is rude though no matter how cute it is i will avoid seeing or talking to him if he is rude and just make remarks that will give a blush on my face. but sometimes it is for our advantage. when an adult keeps doing some things that piss me off, though i can't tell it right on the person's face, the kid may just speak his mind and tell the same thing i had on my mind. and so i get to be spared of the blame of confronting the person, and the child usually just honest and will say any thing that he sees and observes on any person. so sometimes i really make sure that kids are behave and nice before i do get close to it and talk to it and show my fondness to a kid. but generally kids are cute. as long as they will not open their mouth and say those bad things. but if i can still bear with the behavior and words the child say i will definitely, cause i do like kids .
@mellissa2000 (178)
• United States
14 Sep 09
While my daughter never said anything that was rude, she was quite hysterical at 3 and 4. I was working at a gas station and the manager was a large chested woman. I went to pick up my check for the first time and she went with me. She looks at my manager and says, wow you have really big boobs. Both the manager and I busted out laughing and the whole store was looking at us. It was way funny!
@Raven7317 (691)
• United States
14 Sep 09
LOL! That is funny! My son once asked me "why is that man fat?" Thankfully, it was not within earshot of the heavy man, but I had to hold back laughter then too because he was just asking a child like question, but it's not very nice... Sometimes I just don't know how to react! Thanks for the response.
@zhuhuifen46 (3483)
• China
15 Sep 09
Children do speak their thoughts. Mostly those nice words learned from fairy tales, but sometimes, so shocking like adults. My grandson was counting coins for a toy he wished to buy. He still needed two more cents. He tried to sell his drawings. But nobody would like to show interest, as we want him to know nothing of his works is for sale. While feeling like laughing, adults need to teach right from wrong.
@mommaj (23112)
• United States
14 Sep 09
I have a child that was like that too. She will now only play with people who are always nice to her. She will just walk away when kids do something she doesn't want to do. I love that independence or willfulness about her. Your son may turn out to do the same thing. That is just so funny.
