The Opposite of Tiger Mom.

That's the whole point, she didn't see it as a blessing or a curse. She just needed the space to do it correctly. It's I who see it as a curse. what you Cherish I don't so I will never have kids. But I hope that You get to have your kids with the love of your life and get to experience that beautiful blessing. Best of Luck! Take care.

I guess I can understand or at least respect that. Thanks. I hope you are happy and get to find whatever dreams you're chasing after. Best of luck to you too!

Thank you.

Thank you for the BR! @dainy....interesting thought....but I think it's about the way one is raised. Moms who accept that they do not have the 'motherly steak' do fine...because they don't think the mothers who do are wrong. They would thus raise their daughters free to choose what they would want in life. But there are some mothers who BELIEVE that the only way to be is like them....they think the mothers who love what they are doing...raising their kids are faking it. NOW that would pose a problem. I believe that the mothers who do not have the motherly streak are not uncaring...as most people make them out to seem. They are just not the 'hands-on' kind of mother that we usually come across. They like more space than most mothers...to keep their sanity. As long as the kids are not harmed in any way, I'd consider them a 'good mother' and working towards the best interest of their children.Not being around all the time for their little needs doesn't hurt a child (when proper arrangements have been made)....but being mean and saying hurtful things (like 'I'm going away because I don't love you'...'I don't want you'...etc) is what hurts a child.

This type is my mother. And as I don´t want my kids to have a streak mother, I give my soul for them. I think that my daughter will be a streak mother, and that my grandnice wouldn´t, and so far. My grandmother wasn´t streak and my mother was. That´s because the one who is hurted by a streak mother, doesn´t want her daughters to be hurt again. And the daughters that are blessed pampered, don´t value what being a good mother is... don´t you think so? Blessings!... Dainy

He is father of the year. I think the kids are better off missing a mom than have a mom that is so distant that they miss here even though she is in the right in the same room. It worked for her and them. i find it refreshing that it is the guy left holding the bag for once! Many woman are left to raise the kids now men are being left too. It is sad that many don't know they won't be able to handle it until the kids come.

I can't buy this. It turned out best for HER. It is dam tough being a single parent and there aren't many breaks. When the other parent goes AWOL then you do the best you can and the parent that is left holding the bag works hard to make up for the one that bolted. Sure the kids turn out well but that is not to say they didn't suffer some in knowing that the other parent wasn't there. That isn't to say that something wasn't robbed from them by the other parent having to play both parents because it was. If the kids turned out amazing then it is because the parent that got caught holding all the responsibilty was a great parent and stepped up and did all they could to compensate for the irresponsible parent that couldn't handle it and took off. It's amazing that the kids turned out well and all the credit goes to the guy that stayed and did what is right despite the odds placed by the mother that ran. She gets no credit as far as i'm concerned.

I disagree mildly. If she had a baby thinking she could handle it and found out no she can't and then , what within a year , decided to give the baby up, Then it would be ok. But to wait years? Have her boys call her mommy and Then leave? I can understand you point. I Still am glad she didn't hurt the kids physically or stayed and played mind games. I totally understand your point . If Both people agree they want to have a baby , then they both should commit to raise the child , Even if they split as a couple! But sadly there are liars out there . They Say they want a child but Not raise it. So they flee! And the other parent is left holding the bag. I must be rare. Whenever I think of me being a mom , I see the Worse mother Since Medea! the best thing is for me not to have them period!

My family was so the opposite of yours. My mom stayed at home and complained all the time and my dad worked his tail off to provide for us. I never expected my husband to 100% provide for us as my dad did my mom but I never expected to do it all on my own either. I felt it should be a shared effort. If we decide to have kids together then we should work together to provide for them both financially and emotionally. I don't think it is right for one to bail and leave the other holding the whole load. It happens and I dealt with it the best I could and yes the girls turned out fine. I just can't give that mom kudos for moving 3000 miles away. Across town and still be a part of the kids lives is good. She doesn't have to be June Cleaver. I see why you maybe don't expect help from the father and when you go into having kids, you should always be of the mindset that you may end up raising them on your own. I just don't agree with any parent walking away from their kids and only being their on their own time. I do agree with you...you know how you feel and you don't want kids. There is nothing wrong with that. Once you have kids, it is a done deal and too late to decide...oops, made a mistake...not what I thought it'd be.

Here we have the idea that All mothers are suppose to Want to be there for all their children. And that being a mother comes naturally to every pregnant woman.Wrong! Many need help.Many are just having kids but they are not interested in being the best mom they can be.But there is still this model and if you don't fit this model , you get demeaned. so some try and try buy never make it . and then they either get frustrated and get violent or worse they just leave emotionally. My mom was a great mom. I saw all the work that went into it and I thought , it isn't worth it. So I decided no kids for me, I was 7! Nothing has changed. But there are people who hear this and assume when the right man comes along , I will change my mind. Wrong again. I have meet my guy and I Still will not have kids. This mom was responsible. An irresponsible mom would have just left and let the dad have full custody and Never try to see the kids. if I were forced to have kids I would have left and never come back.

Thanks! It would be sad to think you want kids, plan to have kids and then find out you are not cut out to be a mother. I applaud this mom for not staying and mistreating her kids out of frustration.

I believe that one should decide early if she is interested in motherhood and than only have kids. It will not be a good idea at all to have unplanned kids and leave them. As you said few mother enjoy taking care of their kids and others do not so I am saying that just be clear. There are many who just live their life as it and do not know what they want. I am happy that you know what you want .

The same thing comes up when a mother desides to give her baby up for adoption! It is so sad that many judge this selfless act as selfish! I always say , then would you Really want a selfish mother keep and ignore her kids? A true selfish person won't change to raise a kid!