Strange Turn of Events Today

@moffittjc (118702)
Gainesville, Florida
September 11, 2017 7:33pm CST
In the midst of everything going on with the hurricane today, we had a tragic event happen at home. Last night, in the middle of the hurricane, my daughter's dog had what we thought was a series of seizures. God bless the University of Florida, because even during the hurricane their emergency vet hospital was still open. We took the dog to the hospital, where they were able to diagnose that she had a stroke. They stabilized her, gave her medication, and sent us home to ride out the storm. Early this morning, the dog had another stroke, and we once again rushed her to the vet hospital. While there, they determined that the dog was not getting enough oxygen to her brain, and her condition was going to continue to worsen. I told my daughter and the vet that I would spare no expense to treat her and try to give her a fighting chance. My 17-year old daughter, who has had this dog since she was 2 years old, made the most adult decision of her life...she told the vet that she wanted to euthanize the dog so she didn't have to suffer anymore. I had known that this was the most humane decision that could be made in this situation, but I wasn't going to suggest that to my daughter, who considered her dog a loving member of the family. But I was proud of her for making the right decision, even though that meant losing a beloved member of our family. After giving my daughter about 15 minutes to spend alone with her dog, they took the dog back into the operating room and euthanized her. My poor daughter cried in my arms for about an hour, then went home and slept the whole rest of the day. I remember as a child losing my first pet, also a dog. I cried for days. I expect my daughter will be grieving for quite a while over losing a family member who has been there for her almost her entire life. I will just be there for her as best I can and help her get through this unexpected tragic situation. Have any of you had to deal with a child losing a beloved pet? And if so, what are some of the things you did to help console them?
38 people like this
36 responses
@Happy2BeMe (99390)
• Canada
12 Sep 17
I am so sorry for the loss of your pet. This will be very difficult for your daughter. There is not a lot you can do but be there for her through this difficult time. She needs time to grieve.
7 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
The poor girl cried on my shoulder for an hour, and she was hugging me so tight that whole time that I could hardly breathe. But I know that she'll be okay with the passing of time.
5 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
@Happy2BeMe I know, it breaks my heart. But I also know it is part of life, and part of growing up. All I can do is to be there for her and give her a big hug and tell her how much I love her. Time will heal her.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99390)
• Canada
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc it is hard as a parent when our children are hurting and there is not much we can do to ease their pain.
3 people like this
@CinnamonGrl (7083)
• Santa Fe, New Mexico
12 Sep 17
I am so sorry for your family's loss. Our pets definitely are members of the family. I think it's more that I cried alongside my kids rather than was able to console them. It takes some grieving time.
5 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
The funny thing was, I never really liked the dog, but she was a member of the family. At the point yesterday when my daughter made the decision to euthanize the dog, I wanted to cry to. She was a good dog.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (157788)
• United States
12 Sep 17
I am sorry that this happened along with everything else. I am glad you offered to treat the dog and essentially allowed your daughter to have this rite of passage of making an adult decision. You have raised her well and you will be her rock.
4 people like this
• United States
12 Sep 17
The only pet I've lost was a small turtle and some beta fish. They weren't too sentimental to me because it was more of my sisters pet (turtle) and fish (dad's pet). Do you think it was because all of the loud storm/rain/win noises in addition to the age of her/your dog that caused the seizures? Or it has happened before? I am sorry to hear this had to happen.. however dog is no longer suffering
4 people like this
• United States
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc Oh I see! If that was for humans, (too many platelets) then they'd have to get routined check up and blood withdraws every few months. But I don't know how it works for a dog. :( I am sorry for your family especially daughters pet loss.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Well, it ended up being mini-strokes, not seizures, that the dog was having. But we didn't know at the time. It turns out she had an auto-immune disease that caused her body to make too many platelets and white blood cells, which caused her blood to thicken and clot in her arteries and veins. Ultimately, that's what caused the strokes.
4 people like this
@sallypup (58229)
• Centralia, Washington
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc What was the fur person's name?
1 person likes this
@FourWalls (62619)
• United States
12 Sep 17
I'm so sorry. Kudos to your daughter for understanding how to not be selfish. I always say that the last act of love we perform for our pets is the one that breaks our hearts. Prayers for you and your daughter....and it would appear to me, based on this story, that you've raised her correctly.
3 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Thank you! My daughter is the most caring person in the world. But she is also a very smart person. She did not want her dog to suffer any more. Unfortunately, my daughter was with her dog each of the times she had her strokes (which at the time were seizures), and I'm sure that really rattled my daughter to witness something like that. She knew she didn't want to see her dog go through that suffering anymore. The nice thing was, the dog was doing fine and in good spirits when we put her down, so my daughter will at least have a good memory of her dog in the final moments, instead of one where the dog was suffering.
1 person likes this
@bwjsdems (496)
• New Zealand
12 Sep 17
Over the years we've lost a few pets, but the one that my daughter remembers the most is the cat that I took to the vet and then decided to euthanaze while there. My daughter still reminds me that I didn't tell her before hand that it was a likely outcome - but at age 4 I didn't think it was an issue as she was my cat and was 14 years old and quite ill. Since then, I've always told her about the seriousness of any illness, and we choose to bury our pets at home. we have a little graveyard by the house with my cat and a few guinea pigs in there. I think she copes a lot better having the chance to say goodbye. She still cries and misses the cat occasionally, but we have photos around of all our pets past and present, and I let her know that they are just as important in our family as the people.
3 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
We spent the evening telling funny stories about her dog, or things the dog did that made us laugh. So in between crying, my daughter was also laughing. But it's an important part of the grieving and healing process for her.
3 people like this
@rebelann (111388)
• El Paso, Texas
12 Sep 17
I haven't known a child that went through this kind of sadness but perhaps under the circumstances she could be persuaded to help with some of the surviving pets of the hurricane, it'll ease her heart a little. to her for putting her beloved pets needs before her own.
2 people like this
@rebelann (111388)
• El Paso, Texas
19 Sep 17
If she's a volunteer at a shelter she might just fall in love with one of the rescues @moffittjc then you won't have to go through all that.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Well, she does volunteer at the local animal shelter, so maybe I should ask if she wants to go there and help out.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Sep 17
@rebelann I figure I will give her a little time and then bring up the subject again.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (134903)
• Roseburg, Oregon
12 Sep 17
We have loss four cats and one dog and my kids were very upset over the loss of their pets.
3 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Unfortunately, when you have pets, it is an inevitable part of life.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (460004)
• Switzerland
12 Sep 17
I am so sorry, I know that pets are family. You can do nothing to console a child, only the time will help.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (460004)
• Switzerland
13 Sep 17
@moffittjc I have cried for hours when the kitten of one of my neighbor has been killed by a car last year and it was not my pet. I can understand.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Yes, I don't expect her to be back to normal for a week or more. She needs to grieve, and I'm okay with that. She'll be back to her normal, happy self soon enough.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Sep 17
@LadyDuck My first puppy I ever got when I was a little boy got killed by a car. I cried for weeks!
1 person likes this
@bluesa (15023)
• Johannesburg, South Africa
12 Sep 17
I have had to make the decision to euthanize two of my beloved fur babies and each time broke my heart. I am so sorry this happened to you all, you have raised a strong young lady, Jeff. I am sorry but I can't give advice from a parent point of view, but I am certain knowing you are there for her is already a big help @moffittjc .
1 person likes this
@bluesa (15023)
• Johannesburg, South Africa
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc , yes, that is true. I wish I could share missy Daisy with her, but we're too far away. Hugs to you all at this very sad time.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
13 Sep 17
@bluesa Thanks for the hugs! They are always welcome and appreciated!
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Thank you! Sometimes a big hug or a shoulder to cry on is all a child needs.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
12 Sep 17
Sorry to hear that she lost her long-time friend. I know how hard that can be. By the time my daughter's dog that we had adopted when she was 12 was 14 years old and critically ill, Woof had become my dog and my grief was more intense than hers. She was living away as well, so it was easier for her. That was three years ago last August.
2 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Isn't it funny how a mere pet can become such a beloved family member?
@JudyEv (326592)
• Rockingham, Australia
26 Sep 17
I'm so sorry. That is a long time to have had a pet - right back to some of her first memories. I'd be proud of her too for making just a decision. It's the last kind thing we can do for our pets.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
30 Sep 17
It's such a hard decision for even a teenager to make. Pets become such an integral part of our families that it almost feels like losing a human family member.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
30 Sep 17
@JudyEv Is Herc no longer with you? Did I miss something?
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (326592)
• Rockingham, Australia
30 Sep 17
@moffittjc That's very true. Certainly a pet becomes very special to a child/teenager/adult. Even a sheep such as Hercules is missed just as much as a cat or a dog.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (66918)
• United States
12 Sep 17
I'm so sorry for your families loss. Thats so sad
2 people like this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
Aww thanks Courtney. It was a sad day in our household yesterday. It was tough dealing with the loss of the dog plus dealing with a hurricane at the same time.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
@Courtlynn at first my son didn't seem too upset or sad about the loss, but eventually he shed a few tears last night alongside my daughter
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (66918)
• United States
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc oh i bet. Your poor daughter!
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
12 Sep 17
So far, I have been my children's most loved pet, and I am still around! When I lost my first pet, I went searching for it for several years. With the second one, I cried lots and kept dreaming of it for a decade or so... Your daughter made a right decision.
2 people like this
• United States
19 Sep 17
Soory for your loss and doubly sorry for your daughter. Children tend to feel the loss of a pet very badly. I am a cat person and never really had a dog so my children never felt a loss, since cats are notoriously independent the children were never strongly attached.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Sep 17
@moffittjc That's sweet.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Sep 17
I had a cat when I was growing up, me and that thing were inseparable. I had him for almost 15 years. He would even walk me to the bus stop every morning for school, and then be there waiting for me when I got home every afternoon. He was a good cat!
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
12 Nov 17
We lost two dogs this year, one from a sudden illness and one our 15 year old had to be euthanized and it is heartbreaking for adults as well as children. So sorry for your loss, I know this was a while ago already but if you are like me, you are still not over it.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
12 Nov 17
@moffittjc That is a good idea, or if you don't find one maybe you could have one of the artists do one from a photo of her dog.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Nov 17
My daughter and I were talking about it today. We were hoping to find a nice painting or piece of artwork today at our downtown art festival that looked like her dog. I told her that if we found something that resembled her dog I would buy it for her as a sort of tribute to her dog.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Nov 17
@BelleStarr That's a great idea!
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (48582)
• Canada
12 Sep 17
I'm sorry for your and your daughter's loss. You lost some your daughter's innocence thru this, as she has exhibited true adult decision making, and she, she lost her life-long companion, but knows that the dog is no longer suffering and knows that her Dad would do anything for her.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
13 Sep 17
Thank you for your kind words. We are a close-knit family, and we lean on each other for support in times of need. I've got great kids and I've certainly been blessed.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (48582)
• Canada
13 Sep 17
@moffittjc It sounds like you've done a great job raising your kids.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Sep 17
@Juliaacv I've tried my best in raising my kid. I think they're going to turn out okay. I'm more worried about my son than my daughter, because he is so easily persuaded by his friends. I worry about peer pressure causing him to do things he normally wouldn't do. But so far, he hangs around good kids, so I just have to trust him at this point.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (58229)
• Centralia, Washington
12 Sep 17
If it were me I would be weeping with my daughter. She has lost a brother or sister; she has lost a confidant. I had to make a terrible decision, too, when I was just out of high school. That moment and hours afterwards will never leave me. The ritual of burial soothes me somehow; an appropriate song, those moments of letting go. It just hurts.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
I asked her if she wanted to do a burial, but she said no. I was surprised.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Sep 17
@sallypup I thought for sure she would want to do a nice little memorial for her dog in the backyard. There's a nice big maple tree that would be the perfect spot to bury the dog under.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (58229)
• Centralia, Washington
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc That surprises me, too.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40073)
• Laguna Woods, California
12 Sep 17
@moffittjc - Oh, Jeff, that had to be hard. We have had two dogs over the decades and, when we had to put them down, I was heartbroken. However, your daughter really did make a mature decision. You should be proud of her.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
12 Sep 17
I am always proud of her, she is such a good kid. So is my son. I don't know how I got so lucky.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
13 Sep 17
@DeborahDiane I think in a lot of situations where parents complain about their children, if they would have raised them right to begin with, many of them wouldn't necessarily have those complaints.... Then again, I know that not every child can be a perfect little angel, but the key is that parents need to be heavily involved in their child's life to give them the greatest chance at success when their children grow up.
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
13 Sep 17
@moffittjc - I am glad to hear that. My husband and I are very proud of our four daughters and our grandkids, too. We appreciate all of them and enjoy being around them. I hear so many people complain about their children and/or their grandchildren. Maybe they have good reasons to criticize them, I'm not sure. However, I know I'm glad that I don't feel critical about my children ... and I'm glad you don't feel the need to criticize yours, either.
1 person likes this
@just4him (308000)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
19 Sep 17
I'm so sorry about your daughter's dog. I know how she feels. I had to put my dog down last year and it was very hard on me. I didn't have any pets to put down when my kids were growing up.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118702)
• Gainesville, Florida
23 Sep 17
It's never a fun thing to have to deal with, especially when vulnerable children are involved.
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@just4him (308000)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
24 Sep 17
@moffittjc So true. It's never easy, even on adults.
1 person likes this