Good parenting at Safeway. A happy moment for The Horse.

@TheHorse (238388)

Walnut Creek, California

February 8, 2021 7:54pm CST

I was at Safeway, my local grocery store, the other day. A father and his 2 1/2 year old and I battled for position in the "under 15 items" line. I said, "Go in front of me. You have fewer items, and you have a kid in tow." He laughed and said, "He's fun!" I had noticed, as we were both shopping, that he LET his little boy take down every item of interest to him and explore it. The child would then put the item back. At check out, the child was in daddy's arms, and grabbed a giant bag of M&Ms from the "impulse purchase" shelf. Were I to engage in hyperbole, I would say the bag of M&Ms was almost as big as the child. Daddy said, "In your dreams, Buddy. But they really are good, aren't they?" He VALIDATED his kid's interest in M&Ms and never got mad. Together, they put the bag of M&Ms back on the shelf. I smiled quietly to myself as they departed. Daddy and his son were having a great time shopping together and daddy never got mad at his son for being interested in everything that was shiny and tasty looking. Would you agree that that is "good parenting"?

28 people like this

24 responses

@kaylachan (84928)

• Daytona Beach, Florida

9 Feb 21

I agree that's great parentng. The child obviously understands boundaries and doesn't put everything he grabs in the cart hoping 'daddy' will buy it for him. Rather than taking the 'firm hand approach' the father is encouraging the child and allowing him to explore as children tend to do, and if you give them some breathing room.... and the child realizes that he may not want what piqued his interest and returns it. I think that child will grow up to be a responsible adult.

7 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

That is my hope. Good dads are a valuable commodity in any society.

5 people like this

@kaylachan (84928)

• Daytona Beach, Florida

9 Feb 21

That's very true. Stories like that are rare to see, because no one wants to talk about them.@TheHorse

4 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@kaylachan Why would they not want to talk about them? I live in a Country where many boys grow up without dads. No wonder we elected Trump to the Presidency, regardless of Russian help, and no wonder we have so much crime.

2 people like this

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@JudyEv (382664)

• Rockingham, Australia

9 Feb 21

What a great Dad that guy is. They would have both enjoyed their shopping trip.

3 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

They both looked like they were having a really good time.

2 people like this

@BarBaraPrz (51839)

• St. Catharines, Ontario

9 Feb 21

Yes, definitely. (Who is the little copper in your photo?)

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@BarBaraPrz (51839)

• St. Catharines, Ontario

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse Who made the costume?

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

That's Horse Jr. when he was three. He was pretty excited to be a cop that Halloween.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@BarBaraPrz I am not sure.

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@celticeagle (190074)

• Boise, Idaho

9 Feb 21

Yes, I suppose it is. I was taught not to touch things that didn't belong to me.

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@celticeagle (190074)

• Boise, Idaho

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse .......Yes, I did a lot of exploring.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@celticeagle I think that's a good thing!

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

I think I was encouraged to explore the environment, but to put things back.

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@wolfgirl569 (136063)

• Marion, Ohio

9 Feb 21

That was very good.

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@wolfgirl569 (136063)

• Marion, Ohio

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse It is easier when you are grandma anyways. You get to send them home

2 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@wolfgirl569 She told me she was helping the kids out, as her mom had three. Im not sure if she was a retired teacher or not, but it was clear she was enjoying the kids. That's how I knew she was a teacher.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

I saw some good grandparenting at Safeway this evening. I'll write about it in a day or two. I could tell Grandma was a teacher.

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Lenore Plassman

@sallypup (69254)

• Centralia, Washington

9 Feb 21

I admire the Dad but it is hard to believe the boy let go of the treat bag easily.

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Lenore Plassman

@sallypup (69254)

• Centralia, Washington

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse Maybe. Maybe not.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@sallypup In my experience, anyway.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

He did. I'm pretty familiar with having a non-confrontational relationship with a kid. If you agree that "those would be great another time," you can avoid an "I want it now!"

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@Aquitaine24 (12000)

• San Jose, California

10 Feb 21

As far as snacks are concerned, it is good the dad doesn't buy his son everything he wants.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

10 Feb 21

M&Ms are probably not the healthiest snack for a 2 1/2-year-old.

@LadyDuck (502886)

• Italy

9 Feb 21

I suppose it is, my parents always told me to "touch nothing that is not mine", right now we are asked NOT to touch what we do not buy, because of Covid... so it is not totally good parenting.

2 people like this

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@LadyDuck (502886)

• Italy

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse We have signs everywhere asking not to touch what we do not buy. Kid touch everything and you cannot prevent that they touch their mouth and their nose, it is dangerous, also kids get sick.

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

Good point about Covid. I was focusing on the social/emotional.

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Valerie J. Routhieaux

@just4him (323168)

• Green Bay, Wisconsin

9 Feb 21

More parents need to employ his parenting technique. Both left the store happy.

1 person likes this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

I agree. I see many parents (and even teachers) getting angry with their kids.

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Valerie J. Routhieaux

@just4him (323168)

• Green Bay, Wisconsin

10 Feb 21

@TheHorse It's sad to see. It's also sad when the parent allows their kids to act out in the store and give them whatever they want to shut them up.

@Shiva49 (28402)

• Singapore

9 Feb 21

I liked to encourage my son but also told him to control himself while out in the public. This is because people can be fussy and react negatively even if it is just a child. Like the dad here, I enjoyed every moment with my son and still recall them as if it is happening right now.

2 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

I remember many of my favorite moments with the younguns as well.

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@Hannihar (130150)

• Israel

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse I would very much agree that they had a very good relationship and the father was a good parent.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

It was a pleasure to watch.

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@Hannihar (130150)

• Israel

10 Feb 21

@TheHorse I bet it was. It is always nice to see parents talking to their kids and the kids liking it.

@spiderdust (14756)

• San Jose, California

9 Feb 21

That definitely sounds like good parenting! The child felt heard and validated.

2 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

Yep. That's what it all about! NONE of us can every shiny object we want. But if our desires are valdated, perhaps we can delay gratification, and still feel happy.

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Krissttina Isobe

@oahuwriter (26773)

• United States

9 Feb 21

Smart, getting child accustomed to shopping.

2 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

And to getting SOME of what he wants. But not EVERYTHING he wants. My kudos to his dad for making shopping a fun and interactive experience.

2 people like this

@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

10 Feb 21

Krissttina Isobe

@oahuwriter (26773)

• United States

10 Feb 21

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@DocAndersen (54399)

• United States

9 Feb 21

that is awesome! With our kids we established Candy Pick one! it worked really well until our daughter decided the system was rigged and started replying to candy pick one, with candy pick two?

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

Smart girl! Did she learn from your cat? Is she a politician, or business major, now?

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

@DocAndersen Is she enjoying it? Does she market herself well? Marketing is my weakness.

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@DocAndersen (54399)

• United States

9 Feb 21

@TheHorse not from me - but no she is a graphic artist now

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@vandana7 (102698)

• India

9 Feb 21

I agree. The boy learned that he is not gonna get everything he wants. In gentlest possible way.

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@FourWalls (86940)

• United States

9 Feb 21

It sure sounds like it! It sounds as though he was helping the child be interested in things, instead of the “I’m the dad, this is what you’ll like” mentality.

Anne Marie Guyer

@LeaPea2417 (40061)

• Toccoa, Georgia

9 Feb 21

That is good parenting.

@RasmaSandra (98157)

• Daytona Beach, Florida

9 Feb 21

That certainly is good parenting and would have made me smile.s

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

It certainly made me smile.

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Vicki, #1 Creek Girl

@1creekgirl (44560)

• United States

9 Feb 21

It's wonderful to see examples of loving, intelligent parenting. I know you're so glad to have seen that.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

It made my afternoon.

1 person likes this

@thelme55 (79368)

• Germany

9 Feb 21

Wow! I like his way of parenting to his child. Yes, I agree that it is a 'good parenting'.

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@TheHorse (238388)

• Walnut Creek, California

9 Feb 21

There's actually a researcher (Mary Dozier) who has spoken/written about the "joy factor" in parenting/teaching. Kids sense whether we're enjoying our interactions with them.

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