Is "Thank You" Outdated?
By LindaOH
@LindaOHio (222534)
United States
October 30, 2021 6:00am CST
We have a friend of our housekeeper/realtor that has been adopted virtually into the family because she has no mother in her life. Several months ago a bridal shower was held for her; and I sent along a gift -- I was not able to attend. We were then invited to, and attended, her wedding for which we gave the couple a generous check and a nice card.
Neither a thank you note nor even a verbal thank you was ever received. Am I wrong in being a little miffed that she didn't take the time to write a thank you note? What do you think? Is this practice outdated?
Photo Credit: Pixabay
16 people like this
16 responses
@marguicha (230350)
• Chile
30 Oct 21
@LindaOHio I do think that it is also a matter of age. I was not so aware of the importance of saying thank you when I was a teen although I was well brought up.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
@marguicha She is close to 30 (I think) and should have the common sense to say "Thank you".
@Hannihar (130150)
• Israel
31 Oct 21
@LindaOHio
That is so sad that you were not thanked. I find that people nowadays do not know how to say thank you and sometimes I will say your welcome and see if they say thank you and they do not and then I just shake my head and walk away or may say something but it is sad that manners are not learned these days. You welcomed her into the family and she does not even say thank you. That is very sad.
2 people like this
@Hannihar (130150)
• Israel
31 Oct 21
@LindaOHio
It is sad when a simple thank you is forgotten and it makes me wonder why did I even give them a gift if they will not say at least a thank you.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
Yes, I was really shocked that the gift and the check weren't even acknowledged.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (56317)
• Canada
31 Oct 21
We've always received thank you cards from weddings, usually they come a few months later as the couple will include a picture of them on their big day with the thank you.
Our son and daughter-in-law will send out thank you cards for the baby shower that I threw for her last week, and she will include a picture of the twins once they are born. The guests realize that there is a card coming as they all filled in a mailing label for her.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (56317)
• Canada
31 Oct 21
@LindaOHio She mingled from table to table and had labels that she asked the ladies to fill in. Then she took them with her and moved on to the next table. It made it very personable and a great way to catch with everyone that we haven't seen personally in 22 months.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
Including a picture is a really cool thing to do. I've never heard of guests filling out a mailing label; but that's really clever.
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54399)
• United States
30 Oct 21
well I would say that yes Thank you is still critical. That is really sad.
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54399)
• United States
30 Oct 21
@LindaOHio it is, i always make sure to thank people when they do something nice for me. even at work, sometimes people look at me like I am nuts.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
@DocAndersen My husband has said to me on more than one occasion, "Why do you always thank me when I do something for you?" Why wouldn't I? It's just common courtesy.
1 person likes this
@FourWalls (86757)
• United States
30 Oct 21
I didn’t know thank-you notes were even a thing, and I’m nearly 62. That must’ve gone out of fashion (formally) when I was a kid, because I don’t ever remember getting one or sending one.
But saying thank you??? Come on, how hard is that?
That’s why I try to give a like to every response on my discussions. It’s a “thank you.” 
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
I agree. I am shocked that the gift and check weren't even acknowledged.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (44560)
• United States
30 Oct 21
Your friend absolutely should have sent you a thank you card. For some things a verbal thanks or a phone call are enough, but certainly for this occasion, a card is demanded.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (52174)
• Staten Island, New York
30 Oct 21
I never sent out thank you cards for everyone that attended our wedding. I regret not doing it.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (52174)
• Staten Island, New York
1 Nov 21
@LindaOHio No. That's what I said in my response. I started creating them but then didn't like it and never tried again. Plus, they weren't cheap. I regret that now.
1 person likes this
@dgobucks226 (37621)
•
16 Nov 21
Saying thank you is a custom which should never be outdated. It should be a habit not an obligation. Saying it is a simple expression of gratitude and appreciation. Sad the couple is too busy or clueless to realize this simple kind act is so meaningful to those who receive it.
1 person likes this
@oahuwriter (26773)
• United States
31 Oct 21
No, it's never outdated. You know, my second cousin did that. I talked with my cousin, bride's Mom, she apologized. During the wk that followed, thank you card came.
Every wedding I ever went to, a thank you card came, but this one!
Every wedding I ever went to, a thank you card came, but this one!1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
I was shocked that the gift and check weren't even acknowledged.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (93194)
• Bangalore, India
30 Oct 21
Many good manners are getting outdated. And many feel that they are insignificant. That's sad. I feel that slowly the grace of life and gratitude would be thrown out.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
30 Oct 21
Yes, the new generation doesn't seem to feel the way we do.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (93194)
• Bangalore, India
31 Oct 21
@LindaOHio That's sad. But not to blame them. They are more into virtual world than the real world with real people where they need to practice etiquettes.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
You're darn right it's rude! I'm still shocked.
1 person likes this
@CarolDM (203396)
• Nashville, Tennessee
31 Oct 21
@LindaOHio Crazy people these days.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (59250)
•
31 Oct 21
I have noticed many people just say thanks, and that's it.
I was taught by my grandmother that you wrote a note and mailed it. It's just what you were supposed to do. If we got a gift in the mail, or a card with money, etc. we had to write a thank you note immediately, no excuses. I taught my children the same. They still send them out, and are teaching my grandchildren to do the same. I received one in the mail yesterday from my very young grandson, because I sent him a box of matchbox cars. He's only 5. If a child can do that, anyone can.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (222534)
• United States
31 Oct 21
I agree. The gift and the check weren't even acknowledged.
