I have a situation I am not sure how to deal with.
By TriciaW
@TriciaW (2441)
United States
April 20, 2008 8:02pm CST
My mom died 8 years ago and since then my dad has a new girl friend. She is very nice that isn't the problem however her father passed away and I don't know if I should go to any of the services. I mean I have never met her children which may be how she wants it but yet a part of me says I should go. My sister emailed me to tell me about the father's death but I can't get ahold of my sister now to see if she is going. My mom always taught me that you go to a funeral or a prayer service if you know any of the family. I hate going to them but I am good at going to them even if I hate them. I just don't know what I should do. What do you think?
9 people like this
17 responses
@jenni7202 (1598)
• United States
24 Apr 08
Well, I would personally go to show my respects, even if I didn't know the man. It shows respect towards your father's new girlfriend. It may also show her that you don't mind her dating her father, and you accept it, and you like her. It could open up a new opportunity for a friendship between the 2 of you.
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
21 Apr 08
i think if you have no issue with your father's gf, then you have to come... as you say, she is a nice woman and i think she needs all the people that are close to her to support her mentally after she lost her father... so it will be very good if you can come and offer her the support and comfort that she needed... it is kind of respect as well as i had been taught since i am a child... this is only my opinion though... the decision again is yours whether you want to come or not...
@ElusiveButterfly (45939)
• United States
21 Apr 08
If it were me, I would go. Even if you stay for only a short time it will be appreciated by this woman and your father as well.
@jennawash (161)
• United States
21 Apr 08
Absolutely you should go. Not only would it show her that you at least care and respect her. That would not only mean a great deal to her, but also to your father. The best way to view this is to view it from your father's eyes. Would he be hurt if you didn't go?
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
21 Apr 08
If you are comfortable with your dad being with her, I would go, at least to calling hours.
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
21 Apr 08
I was taught that if you wish to attend a service out of respect to the family then please do so. the person that passed doesn't really know or care but the family would appreciate any and all people that attend, so go and and give the family your respects.
@peisiyi (123)
• China
21 Apr 08
i think that you should show up at that ocassion even if you are not fond of the potential step-mother,as a son of your father ,you should take your father's feeling into consideration.if you do so,there is no loss for you at all.at times,you should force yourself to do what you are reluctant to do.it is the time to drive yourself and show up in public ,at least.the behave is a sign tha you are a polite and considerate child in their mind .so take this chance !
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
21 Apr 08
I think you should go out of respect for her. When my mom passed, there were many people that I didn't know. It made me feel good to see them all there and it was nice hearing their memorys of her. I think it would mean a lot to her if you went. I know it would me.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
21 Apr 08
tricia I think you should do it more to please your dad than anything as you say she is nice,then it would also please her too I am sure. Also I think you feel you should go so it would make your decision that much easier. I would say go and you will not regret it and it would please your dad.
@sherlock27 (913)
• United States
21 Apr 08
I would go. Do what you feel in your heart.I'm sure she would feel glad to see you there. You'll be a better person because of it.
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
21 Apr 08
If you aren't closer to her, I wouldn't go. Instead send a card or a small bouquet of flowers.
@rosettaresearch (1285)
• United States
21 Apr 08
Since this person is someone you know and like, you should go. Worry about the meeting kids thing later. You would be going to show her your support. Which is a very nice thing. You don't need to make a big deal. Just go, say I'm sorry and leave.
