Taking Him Out Of Soccer
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
United States
December 6, 2008 7:40am CST
Boy did I get in over my head.
A month or so ago I agreed to allow my oldest son to participate in a winter soccer league. This was only a few days after I'd already registered him for a basketball league.
He had just finished a full season of fall soccer, and he is very good at the sport, and likes it a lot.
But the problem is, the games are on Saturday, and the practices are on Sunday.
His basketball games are also on Saturday, and my daughter has baton lessons on Saturday as well.
Sundays have always been our family day, because my husband has it off, and we usually tend to make plans for that day.
A couple weeks ago we decided to go to the mall. Well I didn't even realize until the next day that we had completely forgotten about his practice! Oops.
This week we're planning on finally getting around to doing our holiday decorating. We talked about letting the kids make paper snowflakes, making construction paper garland, and popcorn garland. We also want to take a family portrait in front of the tree, and then when it's dark, we'll drive around and look at other people's houses all decorated.
His practices are 2 and a half hours long. So it's very difficult to plan our decorating and such around his schedule.
So we talked to him about it last night, and we all agreed that it would be best not to continue with soccer. It's interfering too much with everything else we have going on, and hard to have a family day when he's going to miss over 2 hours of it.
Would you have done the same thing? Or would you have worked around his schedule?
9 responses
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
6 Dec 08
It wasn't completely his coice to get into both. I know he's an athletic child and excells at any sport he tries, so I tend to sign him up for sports without consulting him first. So it was my choice to get him into basketball and soccer. And as I said, his soccer schedule interferes with our family time. Hubby only gets Sundays off, that's it. So that's the only day the kids get to see him. If soccer practice were on a weekday that didn't interfere with anything else, it wouldn't be an issue. It's the Sunday practice that is an issue.
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
7 Dec 08
prinzess- He won't rebel, he loves sports. I sign him up because I know I don't have to ask, because he'll always say yes. But next year starts a whole new level of sports through school, so he will be the one signing up, not me. He's already chosen what he's signing up for.
@prinzess1515 (1341)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Oh, you might want to change the whole signing him up before asking him habit. As he gets older, he might try to rebel against it (just because he can).
@camomom (7535)
• United States
6 Dec 08
I think it would depend on his reaction to the suggestion. It isn't fair to say that he can do it and then take it away, for what he might think is a bad reason. If he was ok with the suggestion then I see no problem with it.
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Obviously he doesn't want to miss out on our family time due to soccer. We explained the situation, and explained our plans, and told him that if he continued soccer he may miss out on other things, and in fact the whole family would probably miss out on things like outings. We can't plan to go somewhere due to the time of his practice.
@camomom (7535)
• United States
6 Dec 08
If he understands and isn't upset, then great, there's no problem with it.
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
6 Dec 08
At the end of the day it is totally up to you as his mum, me if it was my child I would have asked him if he wanted to take a miss or not. It would depend on how important it was to him as to whether I worked around his schedule or not.
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
7 Dec 08
It does sound like a lot of things he is doing, I think sometimes they can take on too much and then family life can suffer. I know my sister in laws daughters are always doing some sport or activity and they are never at home and my sister in law has to run them here there and everywhere!
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
6 Dec 08
We did ask him, and explained all the problems we're having with the soccer such as not being able to plan family events, etc. He was fine with it and totally understanding. With basketball being 3 days a week as it is, I think the 2 together would have been a bit much for him.
@kerriannc (4279)
• Jamaica
6 Dec 08
Hi kats, parenting is so hard. First is what was his expression. Was he disappointed. What you would have done is allow him to go to practice and give him, his part of the work early. This like these really teach one how to be initiative and responsible. You know if he should be at practice at 1pm. you allow him to start at 11a.m. in doing this he will still do his share and enjoyed what he love best soccer. But it is up to you and your family.
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
6 Dec 08
No he wasn't disappointed, he was very understanding. He doesn't want to miss out on family plans, which he would have to in order to continue with soccer. If we choose to go somewhere, we can't because it's not close by and he'd miss soccer. So this is best for all of us.
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Playing two sports at once, to me, is just too much. It's bad enough when two overlap a few weeks. My grandson played football and basketball. He had to miss the first of the basketball practices because of football practice and games. I think fall and spring is enough for soccer. My daughter had 3 at one time playing soccer. She was asked to let one of them play winter soccer inside. It was too much, so they stopped. I don't blame you for stopping one of them. If he really wants to play basketball, let him do that and then play soccer the next season. My daughter's son could not play winter soccer, being on the High School Varsity team. They have about 10 days in December where they can practice or play a game. They had a game last Sunday evening at Soccer Blast and it is probably the only game they are allowed to play during that time limit. Otherwise, they'd be penalized for practicing and playing out of season. But I understand that non-school activities are different.
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
6 Dec 08
There is no soccer in the spring here, not as far as I'm aware. Spring is typically for baseball, which he may or may not be doing this year. Next year we'd like him to try track and feild in the spring.
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
6 Dec 08
It's probably different in different places. Here, they have school soccer in the Spring - Jr and Sr High School. The City Leagues (outside of school) play fall and spring - think that's when they play. Then there are the Premier (traveling teams) that play almost all the time other than in the summer. My granddaughter played in the Fall for the Premier team and once in the winter (this was her last time to play for the Premier team in her senior year), and then played Varsity in the Spring. Her younger brother plays Premier in the Fall and Spring right now. Next year, he'll move up to Varsity teams - 8th grade. Her other son, 9th grader, plays HS Varsity soccer in the Spring.
@zimme448 (5)
• United States
7 Dec 08
In highschool, I was involved in a lot, and probably too many, activities. I think that if he was feeling overwhelmed and if he truly wanted to spend more time with the family, then you made the right choice. I know that I didn't want to admit that I was in over my head and that I missed family time, and so when I had a similar discussion with my parents, I was very greatful. However, if soccer and basketball are things that he enjoys and has a passion for, let him be involved with them, and be willing to compromise some family time for the pursuit of happiness.
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
7 Dec 08
Family time is very important to us since that is the only day my husband has off, and the only day we are able to do things together. he has other days for sports, but family day has been our tradition for years.
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
11 Dec 08
My son wanted to join the local football club, but if I'm honest I'm rather glad that he went off the idea again before it came to fruition. The practices would have been on Saturdays and the games on Sundays, and we're talking at least half an hour drive each way.
@chiaeugene (2225)
• China
7 Dec 08
talk to him in a professional manner and let him choose and make his decision. let him knows too that basketball and soccer are two different sports and he is likely to get injuries if he continues participating in both and it is better for him to do one and stay focus and chances of him excelling is better. a jack of all trade is no better than a master of one in my opinion. if his interest is in soccer, then let him go aheard and enjoy it as you will never knows how good he may be. i was crazy about soccer too but my mom refused to let me play the game so i could not excel in it which i think i would be good if i was given a chance. so dun let your son think that you are destroying his hope but let him choose and decide like an adult and i think he will has his respect for you to allow him to choose like a man
