How many sibblings do you have and where do you fall,do you like that position?
By ronnyb
@ronnyb (6113)
Jamaica
October 21, 2009 3:13am CST
I am the the eldest of three children for my mother .I have one brother and a sister ,ten and twelve years my junior .On my father side thats where things get interesting because I ahve five brother and five sister ,I think lol but ill leave that for another discussion .
The real reason for this discussion is to gage where you fall and if you are happy with where you fall and if you are happy where you fall.Now you might say that offcourse I am happy but do you know there are benefits and disadvantages to where you fall.If you are the eldest like I am then you usally get your parents when they are most exhuberant .They are so passionate about their first child and not wanting to be a failure they are extremely strict and they sometimes pressure you to be a success.Dont get me wrong I didnt mind as I turned out ok but then when I was a child I remember eveening when I wish I could play but I had to hit those books?In additon I remembet that I couldnt go to certain places like rivers and lakes for fear of me being drowned and finally the chores .Being and only child I had to do my fair share of chores (i hated those lol).
Now enter my brother and sister when my parents are much older and more seasoned .They are now pros,they now dont have that dark horse on their shoulder and they realise now that they can be good parents since I turned out so well
and you expect that my siblings would get the same treatment but noooo,my parents have gone soft and they get spoiled .They dont do as many chores as I and they are not as strict, my brother got to go anywhere he wanted (well he was kind of a rebel anyway and very free sprited )
Anyway I odnt want to act as if I didnt enjoy my brother and sister and being an older brother wasnt fun.I now got to be in charge and it felt quite adult like and I also had someone to talk to other than my friends Oh and being the eldest means that I dont get hand me downs lol.
Now to the discussion ,where do you fall in the sibling tree,ware you happy that you are at that position ,what are the benefits ,disadvantages and would you change if you could ?
and you expect that my siblings would get the same treatment but noooo,my parents have gone soft and they get spoiled .They dont do as many chores as I and they are not as strict, my brother got to go anywhere he wanted (well he was kind of a rebel anyway and very free sprited )
Anyway I odnt want to act as if I didnt enjoy my brother and sister and being an older brother wasnt fun.I now got to be in charge and it felt quite adult like and I also had someone to talk to other than my friends Oh and being the eldest means that I dont get hand me downs lol.
Now to the discussion ,where do you fall in the sibling tree,ware you happy that you are at that position ,what are the benefits ,disadvantages and would you change if you could ?10 people like this
33 responses
@kezabelle (2974)
•
21 Oct 09
Technically im the eldest but only by about 20 minutes lol im a twin (identical girls) and we have a younger sister who is 3 years younger than us, dont think my parents were ever full of life to be honest i think having twins was hard a definite shock they didnt do scans then and she was 7 months before they relaised she was rather big and did a scan (thedy were not routine then) infact i wonder if my parents ever really got over that shock lol!
I never really thought about my place in our family to be honest i was and am very loved my parents were always fair and even though i now live 280 miles away from them they are always there for me, I have my own family now two little girls and they get treated exactly the same always will do I wont ever have my girls thinking they have only a set place in this family and thats it!
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
21 Oct 09
First of all i want to say they did a wonderful job RAISING U. I'M SURE U DIDN'T HAVE THE ADVANTAGES BEING THE OLDEST THAT U WOULD HAVE LIKED TO HAVE HAD BUT I WOULD HAVE LOVED HAVING A BIG BROTHER LIKE U. I was the oldest & had one sister that was 18 months younger. We were very close.
@Keola12 (799)
• United States
21 Oct 09
I'm the oldest of three children. I was told that I had to go onto college and get a degree. And that was the end of the discussion. But when my youngest brother dropped out of college, I was told it wasn't his cup of tea. In theory, he was lazy and didn't try hard or rather didn't try at all to succeed in college. He was free to go where he wanted and do what he wanted and when he wanted. He didn't have to live up to any expectations like I did. I always had to set an example for my brothers since I was the oldest. I had to lead by example. An example of which they failed to follow anyway.
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
21 Oct 09
I have 3 sibling and I am the second to the eldest, follow by a lone brother and the youngest is a girl. When my eldest sister got married her responsibilities fall on my shoulder. I do all the housekeeping and taking care of my younger sibling. Thus, I also become like a second mother as when mom is away I am the one who assist on their needs. Thus, if their is disagreement I am the one partly to blame as it means If have not guard well my others sibling. Then, all I have to do is to serve and gives, even though i could make rules and command. I do not really feel being in the receiving end as I am the one who do most of the giving. Thus, I hardly left with lot of compliments. It is also hard to be the middle sibling as I would be the one to lead and be lead as I set good examples and also do my responsibilities. Thus, have to make a lot of efforts to be effective or else I would be criticize...
1 person likes this
@biman_s (1060)
• India
21 Oct 09
I have a little sister of my own who is seven years younger than me. She looks up at me for inspiration and motivation and I am very happy that being the eldest I can live up to it.
I don't have any uncle. On my mothers side I have 4 brothers and 3 sisters and there also I am the eldest. 1 brother and 1 sister is just 2 and 3 months younger than me.
I like being the eldest of all as I can control them and I don't have to listen to anyone's orders, it's not that I give orders to everyone, its just a great feeling to be "Numero Uno".
1 person likes this
@SViswan (12051)
• India
6 Feb 10
I'm the oldest of two girls and well, I am the responsible one. She is 7 years younger than I am. Though I won't say my sister is spoilt, she did get away with a lot of things that I didn't. The parenting style was different for both of us...both because of the kind of individuals we both were and also the fact that our parents had also grown during the period between my birth and hers.
Now that I have two kids of my own (boys 6 years apart and very different from each other), I understand the dynamics and how hard it is to balance things out and be fair. I'm always wondering if I'm spoiling one over the other or I'm being too strict with one....or did this one turn out this way because of my parenting style or because of the kind of person he is. I'm sure my parents must have felt the same way. Well, I turned out okay. My sister was more of the risk taker and would get away with it and have a safety net to fall back on when she went wong. But she's also learnt from her experiences and sobered down now that she is 27.
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
29 Oct 09
I have one (full blooded) sibling and a few step siblings. Don't ask how many as I'm not sure. LOL I'm the baby of the family which kind of sucked while I was growing up because my sister was always bossing me around, or so it seemed. My step brothers (at least the ones from my father's side) weren't any better. Although I didn't grow up with them one of them ratted me out while I was visiting my dad many years ago. I didn't even know there was a rule about it until after it happened. And here shortly after that incident happened the same step brother had his older brother pretend to be my dad when his school called up. I kept quiet about it though because I wasn't the type to rat someone out, at least not intentionally, even though he did have it coming. LOL
It doesn't matter much nowadays where I fall in the sibling tree as I don't keep in touch with any of them anyway. LOL
Happy mylotting!
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
21 Oct 09
Hi ronnyb, I guess it doesn't really matter for me anymore as I will be 70 tomorrow and have just one sister and two brothers who are still living. Believe it or not I am the youngest and looking back I think that I always liked that position in the family. The way I've always looked at things is that by the time I came along my parents had a lot of experience as they had already raised nine children. Blessings.
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
23 Oct 09
I am the eldest of five, I have 3 sisters and 1 brother all younger than me. I guess I'm happy about being the eldest, my siblings don't let me forget that either. I'm getting closer to 40 and the sister next to me isn't that far behind, but she always reminds me that I'll always be older than her..lol. I didn't like being the oldest when I was younger, because of course the other ones could all get away with things but not me, I was supposed to know better because I'm older..ha. I never felt spoiled, I always thought the others were tho, especially when it came to chores my sister could talk her way out of them, meanwhile I was the one in the kitchen doing her dishes, and of course when our mother got sick and couldn't live on her own, who was the one that took care of her, because I'm the oldest and everybody else was too busy with their own lives, and I'm the only one who didn't have children at home. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind taking care of my mom, I enjoyed having her in my home, it made our relationship grow closer, and we're very close now. I love all my siblings, we get together when we can, we always have fun, and I probably wouldn't change a thing. I'm happy with the way I turned out, I think I turned out OK..
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
21 Oct 09
I have a sister who is fifteen years younger than me and we both grew up as only children because when she was born I was too old to play with her and of course I was by myself for fifteen years. I left home when she was only seven.
It was particularly hard for me because I was born in Italy and I was ten when we came here to Australia so I had to make huge and sometimes traumatic adjustments that my sister never had to face and yes, my parents were definitely stricter with me! They were older and less enthusiastic by the time my sibling came along!
These days my sister and I are very close and our age difference is completely irrelevant because as fate would have it we both had baby girls within twelve days of each other so it seems that, although I am a lot older we are both at very similar stages in life. Our girls are very close as well which is great and certainly something we could not have ever planned!
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
22 Oct 09
My father had his own cabinet making business in Italy and the tax system the way it was back then was destroying him and, because he had no other way of getting ahead he and my mother decided to move away from Italy. Now that I have my own family I can't imagine making such a decision, it sure was a brave one!
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
3 Dec 09
Hello my friend ronnyb Ji,
Well,out of three sisiters and two brothers,I am second from bottom. Further, I do not think, if anyone can have choice of being born at particular place from particular womb and further, seniority or being youngest or eldest. These things are pre-determined and I do not think, human-beings hold any authority to be as per their will. I have three children, we were eagar to havefirst as daughter, but we ahd totry and wait after having both sons. My hubby is youngest in the family, so he had less problems as eldest will have.
May God bless You and ahve a great time.
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
26 Oct 09
i have 4 sibblings and am the eldest of that brood of 5. i've never liked it before: divided attention, often tightening of the belt. now, however, as everyone is almost at that marrying stage am quite excited about it for i get to ask questions that i otherwise wouldn't have the confidence to if i weren't the first born. also, as the first one to provide the family with the first grandchild and nephew, am quite tickled pink with the attention.
@Philbo (578)
• Canada
21 Oct 09
I am the fifth of eight children. The invisible one. As a kid I was the one nobody could remember. It has it's advantages. All changed in my late teens and early twenties when suddenly for reasons I won't get into here I became the more famous or infamous of the tribe. I'm comfortable with where I landed and can't see how it would have been better for me to trade places. Interesting to note is that my wife is the fifth child of five in here family and we have five children of our own. Hand me downs I still get. My oldest son's feet have out grown mine so I get his slightly used shoes.
@ladygator (3465)
• United States
22 Oct 09
I am the oldest out of the three of us with my mom. My mother had my sister when I was 8. Then my brother when I was 15. I was not very happy about this as I was always expected to take care of them and way to many house chores. My dad married a younger woman with 3 boys when I was 17. So they became my step brothers. I didnt really feel like their sister as they came in my life so late. And they were really bad, didnt listen a bit. I was pretty resentful of my mother my entire life. I was her stay at home mom as she went and did whatever it was she did. I have since gotten over it and think that it really was for the best considering the life I have now and the multitude that I carry on my back
@sweetgirl_k1 (3972)
• United States
22 Oct 09
I have one brother and I am 6 years older than he is. It was kinda cool growing up cause when he was born I helped my mother a lot with him. I was kinda like his second mommy. lol My mom wasn't really strict on us but she made us mind. My brother got away with a lot more than I did. But we both turned out ok. I kinda like being the older sister cause I feel like he looks up to me even now that he's 22 years old.
@idowrite72 (2213)
• United States
22 Oct 09
I have 4 sisters and a brother..........actually only 3 sisters, now, but I am the middle daughter and have an older brother. I have never thought about my position in the family having anything to do with my happiness or lack of it. At this time I am the middle child. I have always thought of myself as the black sheep of the family since I am the only one who is left-handed. I also was the only one who never really learned to cook as well as the others, including my brother. My mother always told me that I didn't learn to cook because I couldn't take my nose out of a book long enough! All 6 of us have always gotten along well, although my oldest is bosy and to this day loves to sit in her kitchen and gives orders as we are preparing a meal together or even cleaning up after one. She and my brother we always the take charge ones, when there were reasons that they needed to be with family matters. Most of the time, it didn't bother the rest of us, but sometimes there were things that it would have been nice if we all could have had some say in. We all live close to each other and are close and our children all know each other but not as best friends.
@ddhawkins63 (682)
• United States
22 Oct 09
I have one brother and I am the youngest. It doesn't really matter what position I fall in. Being the youngest sister of one brother has great advantages. He always looked out for me when we were younger. It also had great disadvantages because though he kept me safe from others, he could be horribly mean to me himself haha. All in all, I wouldn't trade my brother or my position within our sibling standing for anything in the world.
@greenfeathers (1206)
• United States
22 Oct 09
I am the oldest of two, by two years. Of all the aunts and uncles my folks had the fewest kids. The joke of it was that they were so disappointed with the second...
Which isn't true, and for the record, son #2 is more successful monetarily than son #1.
As for advantage/disadvantage, I guess we were lucky. Our mother figured she had two sons, not one son and another son and catered (and dumped) on each as each needed..
