I Did It

I had this friend who wanted to move here, so I agreed to let him stay with me for a couple of weeks while he could find an apartment and job and all. What I didn't know at the time is that he was TOTALLY broke, and he was running from creditors. So, I let him, his girlfriend, and two dogs move in with me for what was supposed to be a couple of weeks, but it ended up turning into months. What was worse is that he would let his bigger dogs chase my little dogs around the house. He was working, but his girlfriend wasn't looking for a job at all, and he wasn't helping to pay any bills or buy any food or anything here at all. When it was all said and done, he ended up ripping me out of almost $1,300.00, and skipping town. I haven't heard from him since, and to tell you the truth, I am glad he is out of my life...

BRAVO for you! I recently did the same thing ... kind of a sping cleaning of negativity in my life. At first there was sadness on my part, part I quickly realized I had made the right decision for me. About you question of 'only after the relationship was over' -- the thing is you did see the true colors of the friend before you cut the relationship ties, otherwise you wouldn't have snipped them away. The clean break? That arrives through the window you opened when you closed the door.

i know what you mean. i used to have this friend that would want me to give her things and want to share lunches, meaning she'd say, lets do lunch and she'd say she had no money with her etc. after we were done because she knew id pay. well, i took the easy way out i guess. i started making excuses when she called or dropped by, etc. till finally she just gave up right now i have one friend thats sorta a freind but i know her ways and dont let her get away with things any more.

well i am always at fault when cutting ties to a friend because of no reason at all. a self imposed loner for some reason. But there are some that are so persistent and i love them for it haha.

The friend won't be good when they were mood off.Every one will changed at any time.If we don't be careful then our close friend will do like a enemy and we came to know true color of them.we should be extra careful to them and more over we should not bother.

Good, you have done a good job.If people don't consider you as their friend, there is no point considering them as your friend. Even I will do the same.

hi doranmwin if they did not even bother to send an email to you then it was good to delete them as they are not real friends at all.My best friend made it a practice to email me every working day just to keep in touch with me and help me to know some day things will be different. she is my trusted friend. some of my friends here, I have stayed away from as they are complainers. I mean non stop and it makes you feel so down just listeningto that. most of us here have a lot ofcomplaints about the food, but bit#hing nonstop willnot change what they feed us.Who wants to spend time in a friendship where the one spews out hours of complaints about the food, the caretaker, the weather, name it and she bitc#es about it non stop. I now avoid the whiners as they seem to act ually enjoy being miserable and making you miserable with them.

I am a bit dumb because of stress these days so I do not really understand what you are saying. Are you referring to Mylot friends? I've been here about 20 months and I think it is twice that i have deleted people but tis is because they have never answered any post of mine or are not active. Only one person got cross with me here - or maybe two but it is best just to move on. One person sent me a nasty pm because I normally end my posts with the word 'blessings' but only use that word if I have said a quick but genuine prayer for God to bless them and their families. I remember now two other people criticized me as they said that I should not be disrespectful to my adopted country. I don't remember anyone else. Or perhaps you are talking about Facebook? I know that I am not online much these days and I miss everyone so much. Hopefully this stressful period will end in a few weeks and I will be able to log on for an hour daily. Many blessings

It is so sad that people have to act so heartless. They really should not have stabbed you in the back at all if they are your friends. I see many people like that around where I live. Most of them stab me in the back. Once I found out that one of my so called friends stabbed me in the back. When I ended the friendship, she said that I should not have done it and that it was a big mistake. Well I think how is it a big mistake when the mistake that they made was stabbing me in the back. I found out today she writes this "is soooooooo happy! Got to see my Mr Mysterious on webcam for the first time today.............HOOOOOOOH MY GOOOOOOOOD!!!! He's even yummier than I thought! lol His pics dont do him justice but his voice is PURRRRfectly matched he he he he I LOVE YOU BABY!! C U real soon ? ?" The strange thing is, she had been meeting a guy and have seen him face to face. So why write this. The only thing that I can think of is what some one else is saying. One of my friends have been speaking on a chat program to this woman and I didn't know about it (not that it is none of my business). The worse thing is that my friend is married with a lovely wife and the woman that wrote that is a game player. If my friend meets up with this single woman could mean a disaster to his marriage as I know what he is like as well. I really pity the wife as she is a lovely lady and they would be stabbing her in the back. I have been thinking that I would be better of without them in my life as I don't want to be caught up in their web of disaster. Of course this is not my only story that I have, there is too much backstabbing in this world because people are not happy with their own lives so they have to destroy other peoples lives. Because of all the backstabbing I see around me, I do want to save up money so that I can move to another country and start my life all over again. When people don't know me, they don't have the chance to backstab me.

Good for you! You may not notice the change now, but you may see very soon that you're sure not missing the garbage you were having to deal with - at all. I guess I've pulled the plug so many times, that I have concluded that when I make the break, I need to have the last word. Then they will have heard my side - and I wouldn't need to hear theirs - mostly because I already know it AND it's too late to try to patch up anything. True colors . . . I think it was already apparent to me - and that was the reason for the break up in the first place.

Im sorry you're finding out that they werent your friends. It does hurt, doesnt it? You dont call them, you dont give them signs of life and its like you dont exist. They arent wondering whats going on with you, why you're not in touch anymore. I know exactly how it feels. Hang in there!! You did the right thing.

Congratulations to you. I'm kinda into this situation that my some of my friends are abusing my kindness and I'm kinda fed up about it. They're fun to be with but sometimes you can feel that they don't think much about your welfare but more of themselves at the expense of others. To top it all, you can hear complaints from some of them when the fact is they don't contribute much for the group. I've put out my grievances against them. Hopefully they will now realize the faults they've made and they would now be more sensitive to other people than just complain. It's quite sad that it had come to this situation but I believe that If I don't speak out, they wouldn't know their mistake.

Good for you to ended it up before thing got worst. You should not feel hurt due to their ignorance instead be happy as they would not be bothering you anymore. I managed to see the true colours of one of my friend even before the relationship is over. I never tought that she will talk behind my back and made up stories about me. I used to be close to her, but then one day, my other friends confronted me and tell me what she been doing all this long.It turns out that she has been backbitting for a long time and it get worst recently until my other friends could not stand with her anymore and decided to tell me the truth.However, i am not that brave to cut clean with her, so what i did is i kept my self apart from her and gave her a good silent treatment.

its very hard to find a true friend. I have friends like that,what i did is i pray that they may be enlighten and renewed but i never said nasty against them

I know it hurts when they don't ask why you don't want to be their friends anymore.. almost makes you feel like they really don't care. Though it could be a lot worse. Just a few months ago I deleted a girl from my Facebook page because she was a total drama queen and seemed to want to cause problems in my life. I got highly annoyed and tried to ignore her.. but then she said something that I took offense to over my MIL's passing.. so I deleted her. Then she kept sending me new friend requests and messaging me asking why I did it.. and I ignored them. Then she messaged my husband asking him why I deleted her.. then as an after thought said "Oh, BTW, sorry to hear about your mother".. so that ticked me off even more. Then her husband started bugging both me and my husband. In the end hubby and I both deleted her and her husband both.. and eventually they both gave up trying to figure out why and just left us alone.. and let me tell you our lives are so much more peaceful now!

Most of the time I just don't return calls or excuse myself for busy reasons. One once in recent years did I have to come right out and say I think our relationship is over. I hate confrontation.