Daughter of a neighbor eloped with a guy

Hello Sir! The situation is not new and pointing fingers to whom to be blame will not help the situation. Both the parents and the child as well as the society contributes to the condition of the lovers. The girl is yet a minor and shes in the stage of impulsive when it comes to love. Well the boy is old enough but then irresponsible and perhaps unfortunate in life. It's not healthy to give negative conclusions on them. Proper guidance is never too late but the problem would be is the capability of the girls parents to give guidance and inject values. Any parent can't keep an eye on their children 24 hours a day that's why values education , nurturing children with love and affection, constant communication at home would be of great help in making our children not to go in any untoward situation.

Okay, I would condone this if they were all of legal age, but that is not the case. Women in my family cannot get married until 18, and even then, we still think that's too young. Truthfully, women shouldn't get married until after they are 21, because by then, you are out of that whole teenage phase, and you can make decisions on your own no matter how stupid they might be. I am 25, and I have a steady relationship with my boyfriend of three years. My boyfriend was 18 when I met him, and I was 22. He is 21 now. We are both adults and we can both make our own decisions, and we have chosen not to get married until we are each out of college.

That is bad if he does this to her parents and her . yup the parens should have been more aware of what she was doing.

Yes, you are right they can not legally marry. If they even really did marry. If i was the girls parents id be pressing charges. There is still statitory rape. Where it doesnt matter if she were willing or not. As long as she was underage he is guilty. You would think he knows better. Maybe or maybe not the things you mentioned could happen. Hopefully not. Has her parents had any contact with their daughter since sheleft home? Im in Colorado. Recently my neice in Iowa called herself having a boyfriend she met online. He is in Missouri. I found him on facebook and friended him to find out more about him. Thank God for facebook. Meanwhile my neice desided she didnt want a long distance relationship. Im so glad she changes her mind a lot still. She is 18 so we cant relly tell her what to do. But at least she takes advise from her long distant aunt. Thank God for that too.

Wow Professor, you are so gossipy. There are several factors that influence the elopement. I am sure it is not only the parents fault. You have to understand how young people madly in love to know that however ell parents guide them, they will stray and make mistakes.

Hi, Professor2010! After reading your story I am reminded of a statement in recent Chinese Internet novels. The intelligent quotient of girls who are in love is zero. But how can she fall into love with the guy? Human emotion is really mysterious... Hope she can see the error of her ways and repent soon. God bless the poor girl!

Hi there Professor I think it is common all over now and it is sad At that age they should still be enjoying the freedom and the Childhood Parents today do not think when they let the Children on the Computer and what can happen but also Girls at that age will feel flattered when a Man of that age makes fuss and pays a lot of attention to her, they think it is great but also they know deep down it is not right because they never tell the Parents and that is where they fall in the trap When I was 15 I was still climbing Trees lol There where no computers or anything like that then, basically today this is what quite a few People use to meet their "Dates" to me that is really sad

Hi. Professor2010. She is just weigh too young to be dating an 25 year old man. How is he going to have a girl and not have a job nor any income at all? He is a complete scrub. I hope that his intentions are right and not wrong. If my child is this age, I will forbid her to marry this guy. He is too old for her and he should know better, at least.

Certainly the parents are very much responsible for this fifteen year old child, they are responsible for the values she has been brought up with and they are still accountable for her actions now. I am aware that teenagers can be crafty and manipulative and can make any good parent’s existence very difficult. A twenty five year old boyfriend for a girl this age is a reason for concern because even though he may not be an evil abuser he is still too old for this child; he is a grown up and she is still a kid! The internet is not entirely responsible for the situation because young girls meet guys off line too, besides it is impossible to shelter anyone from the World Wide Web so the answer is education and values from the parentsI guess...

I do not blame the parents I just blame this man who took advantage of an young innocent 15 years old whom at this tender age believe in love and romance without thinking of consecuences. I hope she can be found soon and this predator can be punished.

Its a sad and common story. Her parents technically have the right to chuck the guy in prison. I'm guilty myself of such an ordeal- I did it when I was 15 and my parents nearly killed the guy...

first of all ,the girl is minor and if they want to marry,it is not legal also. she has no matured mind at this age and so taken wrong step in her life. if that guy is good guy,he should convince her that(when they are chatting only in net),that girl is minor and there is much age gap also.as he is road side romeo only,he may asked her to come out of her home .by this only ,we can know that this guy is not good guy and not matured like that girl. now a days parents are busy in their jobs,outside entainments and parties and have no time in watching and taking care of children.if parents are like friends to their kids,they can know some information about kids studies,friends,and their behaviour and can teach kids good morals. girls should be careful from teenage and should be well educated and should settle in life and should do marraiges by parents wish(As per our indian tradition). i think love marriages are also good ,but understanding between them should be more and lovers should convince their parents and do marriage ,if there are majors and well settled in life. this type of eloping and illegal things can happen to ,girls and any matured woman in any country. only parents and teachers should teach kids good morals. in my country india also(as u know),these type of eloping,acid incidents are becoming common now a days for teenage guys. guys are easily trapping girls and guys crime rate is increasing more day by day. girls should only think correctly and should properly know about guys,by going to his parents house and his relatives houses and know more about him. girls should not take decisions quickly by accepting guy's words.

I did get married to someone that I met via the internet, but it isn't something that I've ever thought was wrong in my situation because of the fact that I was mature and ready to make that kind of decision in my life. In the case of this young girl, I think that it is partially her parents fault because that age really isn't old enough to be on the computer all the time without some semblance of supervision.

So very true professor , for me , one to be blame here are the parents. Where are they ? Why haven't they guarded and guided there children ? They might be too busy with work that they forget their responsibilities to the kids. Kids are left to the Nanny's , to the computer or to the high high end gadgets. The result , those were the things they got. Regret is too late and won't help now. Parents must talk to their kids about this thing , the whole family sit down in this matters , citing the advantages and drawbacks , stressing the consequences. Communication is the word for this. Communication plays great part in family life , in fact it is the vital thing.

If she were 18 or 21, I would say that she is legal and she can do whatever she wants, but since she is a teenage girl. This is just wrong.

I hesitate to blame the parents entirely for the actions of their 15 year old. Teens are famous for doing things that go directly against all that we as parents tried to teach them. Also at age 15, it is impossible for the parents to watch over her shoulder 100% of the time. What I find odd in this story is that she was able to elope (sneak off and marry this guy)?? As you mentioned it is illegal so how and where did they manage to get married? Also it is illegal for him to have a relationship with a 15 yr old. What is on the parents is that it is up to them to go after this guy and press charges and get their daughter back.

I put the blame on the guy. He is a predator. The parents have some responsibility too, but the primary fault is on the guy. It's awful. I hope she comes out of it OK.

yes i know what you mean. that teen must have been blinded with what the guy was saying. tsk tsk. yes her parents might have been also responsible, probably if they kept an eye on her or they were less lenient..she should not have done that. it is making me scared because i have a daughter tho she is still 6 now, i am afraid of what she will become in the future. that is why i do try to instill in her good values so she will learn to make good decisions in the future.

Do not blame the parents! Off spring can be so sneaky. I never had a girl. I always assured my 3 boys they will be solely responsible for their actions. I will do everything possible to make sure they do! They knew I meant it. They are adults now and still suffer my promise. That girl is too young to know what she's doing yet has two arms and two legs, etc., to make too many adult decisions without the experience. You can nail her windows shut and she will still find a way.

well,i have the same thoughts with you.i live in China,some things like this happened in my country,however not around me.the parents pay no attention or too much attention to their children,this makes the young do stupid things.