How to make friends

I would hope that someone would help you out but I can see why you wouldn't trust that. How horrible and sad it is that a woman in a wheel chair can have such an accident and no one bothered to offer to help. I understand that the world has become a scary place but to me, it does not seem as if people are just fearful. It seems they've grown colder as well. i could not ignore someone in need of help. I came home one night and saw a truck had backed up and landed in the swamp. His headlights were shining straight up into the sky. In the moment, I did not even think about being afraid. I walked toward the truck and suddenly a young college age kid crawled up over the embankment. I asked him if he was ok and if he needed me to call anyone. I did not have a cell phone at the time but I had a house phone. He was not hurt but was very drunk. He wanted me to call for a tow truck and then stand out there and lie to the cops that it was me who was driving because I was sober. I told him that I would not lie and that I'd had my car towed a few times and no cop ever showed up. He had a cell phone and told me to forget it...he did not need my help so I went into my apartment. Oh a tow truck came and so did the cops. Anyway, I got a lot of lectures from people for even approaching the kid. Anything could have happened, they said. Thing is, it was very late at night and IF he were hurt, he could have been there for hours before someone saw him. I would rather take that risk than to feel the guilt later if someone had needed help and I ignored it.

Yeah, no one welcomes you anymore. I find it quite sad. I hope if I fall out in the yard someone will have the wherewithal to at least come ask if I need help. I keep my phone on me just for that reason. I had a wheelchair accident several years ago. I wanted to go see my best friend and I was wheeling myself along okay and then the street got steeper and I couldn't control my chair. I tried to stop it by doing a Fred Flintstone move with my feet and it threw me out of the chair. I landed next to the ditch. I had to call 911. No one outside even called to me to see if I was hurt.

Hi Ritter. It's okay. I'm over it. I was quite depressed when I wrote this discussion. I'm happy with my online friends. Y'all are more real than any offline friends I used to have.

okay if you feel like it will work, I still think the tea is a good icebreaker though

Everyone has iced tea in their fridge. It's a staple. Even in winter. No one hardly drinks hot tea.

When I first came here in 1977 everyone waved and were hospitable. They told you to come back soon and don't be a stranger...but people in this neighborhood and my last one were all very much to themselves. I will have to try something like that. I think I will just be honest and say I have not made any friends here and I've been here 7 months already.

I agree with you on that PQ. I am very busy and my work hours as well as other obligations don't allow me much down time. I also value my space and solitude. Still, I love people. I had one friend here that I actually met through the kids when they were a bit younger. It was so cool. She lived just across the way from me and would stop by about mid-morning for a coffee & chat and then usually after dinner, we'd meet up again for another coffee. It was that comfortable kind of friendship where she KNEW that my door was always open for her and hers for me. Unfortunatly, she moved and while we are still friends, she is a distance away and so I rarely see her. I have other friends outside of the neighborhood but it is really cool when you can just call someone up and say "hey, I need to talk or Im taking a break, want to come over for a coffee?"

Yeah it does I think. I don't have any kids. My daughter is 43, so kids aren't an option. I'm not going to force myself on anyone but I DMSO hope I can get to know some folks. Most of the time I like my space but there are times when I would like to be around people for coffee and conversation.

Yep most people are very busy now. All of my old friends are various distances away from me. I have a couple of friends that come to the house sometimes but they are family friends, not my personal girlfriends.

I guess that is me too. I hope this isn't the one I asked Alex to zap. It got double posted somehow. I'm really not one to be a social butterfly. However, we have a beautiful neighborhood. It's sad not to know a single person.

I actually had plans to bake cookies and introduce ourselves when we moved here. Well, we already met a bunch of the neighbors before we actually settled in - so we didn't need to introduce ourselves anymore. And then I just never got around to baking cookies. I was going to do it for Christmas then - but that never happened either!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So...are you all social or not yet due to not baking the cookies get? . Why is it so hard!?

That's how it is for me. I met the lesbian couple cause of their dogs but just to say hi. I've got to make a move somehow. I just want to find someone to connect with. I miss my old friends so badly. I don't have a car to go visit them and they haven't come to our house.

Yes! We all live in our own little worlds! That's it exactly.

I'm not the type to force myself on anyone. When I wrote this I was feeling a bit lonely but I'm fine now and I'm happy with my life and happy with my friends here.

My daughter was hyper active anyway and she used to drive me nuts when we out in public. She was up and all over the place if I didn't stay on her constantly. So getting her to go get things was a means to an end. Hope you get to know your neighbors.

That was a great strategy with teaching your daughter to become social. I think always being shut up as a kid ...you know...being seen but not heard... I just was stifled because my mom and dad were always shushing me. Be quiet! I guess I just learned to be how I am. I don't know how to be any other way. You have a great idea. I'd have to offer my name again because I would have to ask their names again.

Sounds like Kingsbury! I grew up in Kingsbury NY and that is how it was when I was growing up.