How long do you let someone live with you for free?
By Amber
@AmbiePam (100010)
United States
June 29, 2025 12:36pm CST
So say you are letting someone live with you for free because their circumstances aren’t the best (no, not me). They have a nice RV, but they can’t seem to sell it. You let them live there, thinking it is temporary as they say they eventually plan to move to Maine. They are retired (in perfect health and very spry - takes care of her mother 2 days a week), but their income is as high as yours. After a year, they move in as a roommate with an ex in-law, and they split the bills. Eventually, that in-law gets tired of hearing about family woes (I mean they are an ex for a reason), and the in-law very nicely asks her to move out (they do remain friends). Where does that person go? Back to free rent USA. Another six months goes by.
I don’t think there is any motivation to move unless rent is being paid. I also think you could collect rent (if you want to be really kind), and save up that rent until there is enough to say here, this is plenty for you to get your own apartment with deposits paid and everything.
I also full acknowledge this is not my business and therefore I have kept my mouth shut and offered no judgment or advice. I do not plan to say a word, but I still have a silent opinion. Told only to you, although a relative of mine has a loud opinion she frequently shares with me.
15 people like this
16 responses
@DaddyEvil (152100)
• United States
29 Jun
We let a friend live with us for a year rent free... He moved in when he and his wife started getting divorced. He lost his job shortly after that. Their divorce was finalized six months later and I suggested he find a job... Three months go by after he started working again and I suggested he either move out or help with electric and gas bills here. Nothing came of that. Then my car broke down and I asked him to drive me back and forth to work until I got my car fixed... He said "no". Pretty told him to be moved out by the end of the day.
3 people like this
@DaddyEvil (152100)
• United States
29 Jun
@AmbiePam She was MAD that he didn't want to help us after living with us for free for so long! He walked out the door and we didn't see him again for several days... After the second day, I changed the locks... 
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (54005)
• Canada
29 Jun
They should be paying rent.
We had a guy who fell on hard times in the early 1990's, and lost his place.
He was at a disadvantage as my husband did not think that he could read, so reaching out for support was a challenge.
He, and his huge German Sheperd dog, moved into our basement and took the entire basement, except the laundry room over. I noticed a ticket on the floor of the laundry room floor, which was his, but he got while driving my hub's truck. That put me over the edge, and reminded my husband, gently, that he had been there for almost 6 weeks without paying us a dime, and was making the same wages as my husband was.
He brought it up gently to him, and he said that he was going to be moving that very weekend. It was a relief. I didn't mind helping out, but there comes a time.......
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (54005)
• Canada
29 Jun
@Albain We were in our late 20's when this happened.
He was a single man, without a girlfriend or a wife.
My husband remained friends with him until that guy no longer had good enough health to work with him.
He passed away in his 30's due to cancer.
2 people like this
@Albain (242)
• Edinburgh, Scotland
29 Jun
I know what you mean! We had a friends' 18-year-old daughter move in with us after she fell out with her mother. She wasn't working and couldn't afford to pay her way but she was in desperate need with nowhere else to go and we have known her since the day she was born. She did help around the house but after a few weeks it began to get awkward. We were going to bring up the subject of her moving out but, fortunately, she and her mother made up and she moved back home. If that hadn't happened I don't know what the outcome would have been!
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (164423)
• United States
29 Jun
I had a freshly graduated college student live with me one summer. He worked three small time jobs. When he was not working he remodelled my bathroom and was a joy to be with when he got it straight that my daughter was just his friend. She was gone all summer to various camps and ministries though. I still tell people that Roger was my Summer Son. We had limits on how long he would stay, though. He would bring people he worked with over to enjoy my leftovers from time to time.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (164423)
• United States
30 Jun
@AmbiePam No, it doesn't. Now I loved having Roger and some of the other college kids around, but the next place that he lived had different expectations. He is a business owner and father of six kids. I just realized, I do not know if his Mexican wife ever got her citizenship. . . I hope she will not be in trouble. Please pray.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (100010)
• United States
29 Jun
That sounds like a very good man. He must have such good memories of you. And you must have been such a blessing.
This person is a good person, and I know they used to cook a couple times a week for their host(s) the first time around, but goodness. Being a Christian doesn’t mean you need to be a doormat.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (192981)
• United States
29 Jun
They should be paying rent. End of story!
2 people like this
@LindaOHio (192981)
• United States
29 Jun
@Albain If they are earning as much as you are, they can contribute something to the household.
2 people like this
@Albain (242)
• Edinburgh, Scotland
29 Jun
Ideally, yes, but sometimes family circumstances are such that someone needs help through no fault of their own. Sadly, situations like this are common. We should always be ready to help a family member or close friend in need but I understand your point - there is a limit to what we should be expected to provide.
2 people like this
@thislittlepennyearns (64663)
• Defuniak Springs, Florida
30 Jun
We're we friends when we let a (now ex) friend hook his camper to our power and live in our backyard?
1 person likes this
@allknowing (148514)
• India
30 Jun
I had one who lived with me for six months but we charged her a small boarding fee.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (85152)
• United States
5h
Personally I've never had anyone live with me for free but I do know of other people who have and it never worked out well.
1 person likes this
@Traceyjayne (2609)
• United Kingdom
30 Jun
if the income is the same they should be able to afford a place of their own. Or, maybe move in with the Mother whist they save for their own place.
If they were staying longer than, say a month, I would say its reasonable to ask for rent or help with the bills.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (17181)
• Raurkela, India
30 Jun
Some people have the second nature of extracting services for free. My neighbours are like that and therefore I avoid them.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (45635)
•
29 Jun
We went through that once when my boys were still home. A friend of theirs had no place to go (long story short) I set down some rules such as clean up after yourself, etc. Then his stay got long and stressful, he constantly played rap music that seemed to shake the house, and had no regard for others. We had to ask him to leave. He seemed like a nice kid, but once he moved in with us, we couldn’t deal with the rudeness and the noise.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (45635)
•
29 Jun
@AmbiePam
We all felt that it was. He went to another friend's house to stay. He lasted a week there!
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (191967)
• United States
29 Jun
Well I guess if everybody is comfortable with the arrangement, there doesn't need to be a limit However, if the moochers are wearing thin it is up to the providers to say something. There is a house down the other street that lets someone with an RV park there in a semi permanent arrangement. They are there for a month or two and then go off for awhile.
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (118436)
• Marion, Ohio
29 Jun
I would maybe give them a month. No more. Especially if their income is the same as mine. If I can make it then they can.
1 person likes this
