Does your child lock their bedroom door?

United States
July 27, 2008 4:40am CST
Do you ever worry when your child or teen locks their bedroom door? Do you think they are trying to hide something from you? Whenever my daughter locks her bedroom door, I know for a fact that she is about to do something wrong! Last time she locked her door, she had put a box up on her bed and was sitting in it. When I finally got the door unlocked she looked worried like I was going to be mad. And of course I wasn't mad. Just worried. I didn't make a big deal about it. I know that she locks the door so I won't catch her doing something she should not. What would you do if your child started locking their door during the middle of the day? Would you suspect that they were up to no good?
20 people like this
40 responses
@irishidid (7688)
• United States
27 Jul 08
If I were constantly barging in their rooms they probably would start locking the doors. At this point they don't because I give them their privacy. I knock on the door before entering. I don't think a locked door automatically means they are up to no good. My kids have never given me any reason to not trust them.
4 people like this
@katsmeow1213 (24638)
• United States
27 Jul 08
My kids don't have locks on their doors. My oldest keeps begging for a lock to keep his siblings out of his room, but he is the only one who has something other than his bed and dresser in his room. The younger children have all their toys downstairs, and nothing in their room but a bed and dresser. The only time they spend in their room is getting dressed and sleeping. The oldest has his books and games and a TV, but not much else, so really nothing for him to get in trouble, unless he's watching TV when he's been told not to.
3 people like this
• United States
28 Jul 08
In our house, it's just the opposite. Her toys are in her bedroom, cause the livingroom overheats in the summer and freezes in the winter. I don't want to get her used to playing in there. Sometimes, I wish we had a big family room with central heat and air. Well wishes don't pay for themselves!
3 people like this
@msedge (4020)
• United States
3 Aug 08
My daughter never lock her door only during bedtime.Sometimes she would want a privacy like she don't want us to hear she was talking with someone on her celphone.But i do understand that shes already a teenager and i can understand that she has things to keep in private.
@gemini_rose (16208)
27 Jul 08
We do not have locks on any of our bedroom doors, the only door that has a lock on it is in the bathroom. But as of yet none of mine have ever locked the door on themselves! As of yet I say LOL
3 people like this
@deebomb (15348)
• United States
27 Jul 08
We have a policy at our house when a bedroom door is closed stay out unless you knock. It has worked very well for us over the years and we don't have locked doors.Yes teens do need their privacy and that needs to be respected. But as you said a locked door can mean trouble.
@alori61 (345)
• United States
27 Jul 08
In my house a locked door is most generally just a message to siblings that the child behind that door needs some privacy. I don't fret over them unless they are being used to torment another child then I step in. Locks are not a big deal around here it just means we have a large family in a small house and someone needs some down time.
3 people like this
• Malaysia
27 Jul 08
My son locks his door at night so that I will not catch him sleeping with the lights on. I took away the keys so I can now open the door. He does not do anything bad. So far he did not lock the door during the day.
3 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22994)
• United States
27 Jul 08
As much as I trust my kids..thats a key reason why they DONT have locks on their bedroom doors...its just too tempting for a kid to get into trouble IMO...
3 people like this
@spalladino (17929)
• United States
27 Jul 08
If my daughter was HOME during the day I'd worry that she was up to no good because, at 17, she is rarely home. She does lock her bedroom door sometimes but her excuse is usually that she is changing her clothes (again) and she doesn't want me to barge in on her. I agree that teens especially need their privacy so I wouldn't worry too much about the locked door unless you start to smell strange smells coming from her bedroom.
3 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32277)
• United States
27 Jul 08
A mother should worry that their child is locking the door. I'm not a mother yet, but I know that when I am and when they get into their teen years I will only worry if they lock the door while their gf or bf is there. If they do, I'll express that the door is not to be locked but can be shut and that I will not bother them unless I am calling for dinner or unless I need to tell them something.
2 people like this
• United States
28 Jul 08
That would worry me too, about a boy being in her room if she were a teen! More so, I would worry that my spouse would over react and try to run the car over the boyfriend locked in her room! Right now she is four and just into kid's mischeif. I worry constantly.
2 people like this
@capirani (1832)
• United States
28 Jul 08
This is one thing I have never understood...why parents even allow their kids to have their boyfriends or girlfriends into their bedrooms. That is just inviting trouble in my opinion because unless you park yourself where you can see the door at all times, that door is going to close at some point and you may never even know. I believe that if kids have their boyfriends or girlfriends over they should stay out in the open areas where the rest of the family is. "Privacy" should not be a valid issue for allowing them to be in the bedrooms. They can have all the privacy they need on the patio, porch, going for a walk, or sitting in a different but open room of the house, like the dining room or something where anyone is likely to pass through. Teenagers don't need that much privacy even though they think they do.
3 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32277)
• United States
28 Jul 08
If anything, and this in general so pertains to, I would have a key to their locked door as well as them having their own key.
1 person likes this
27 Jul 08
I dont have children but dont agree with them having a lock on their bedroom door. I know children want privacy and I agree with that but I would hate not knowing what they are doing in a locked room. They dont need a lock on the door to have privacy, I never had a lock on my bedroom door but always got privacy when I needed it!!!
2 people like this
• United States
28 Jul 08
Certainly! If she wants privacy, I have no problem with that. Except at her age, I know she is going to use that time alone to get up to mischeif like climbing up into her closet or harrassing the kitten. When she is older, I won't worry so much.
1 person likes this
@KrisNY (7609)
• United States
3 Aug 08
My daughter does not have a lock on her bedroom door. So she can't lock it. She is 11- almost 12 and she is a really good kid. I would still probably wonder what she was doing if she started to lock her door. Your daughter was sitting in a box- too cute.
@academic2 (7014)
• Uganda
3 Aug 08
My kids fear darkness alot so you will never ever expect them to sleep in their bedroom when it is not locked-they lock it all the time, bith day and night-they imagine a killer could enter during the day, so they keep it locked!
2 people like this
@moneyandgc (3439)
• United States
3 Aug 08
My children are not teenagers yet. The oldest will be 11 in September. Then I have a 9 year old, 7 year old and 2 year old. The only one that locks the doors is the baby! She shuts herself in and pushes the button. Then she freaks out because she is in there alone with the door shut. She isn't quite tall enough or strong enough to turn the knob. Luckily all of our doors just take a second with a butter knife to pop open. I used to lock my door all the time when I was a teenager though. I wasn't doing anything wrong or bad. I just wanted my privacy. I hated it when people barged in my room so I locked the door. So, I made them knock!
2 people like this
@williamjisir (22913)
• China
3 Aug 08
Hello dear beauty queen. My son never locks his door unless he is not happy. He always sleeps with the bedroom door open anytime of the day. So we do not have worry about him for his open bedroom door. Good day, beauty queen.
2 people like this
@cyberfluf (5006)
• Netherlands
3 Aug 08
I'm not to sure as I never had a room I could lock myself and neither do my foster brothers, that solves the whole problem I guess. It does ask a little more from both child and parent because when I got mad ( I rarely did) or sad I would go to my room and close the door, and my parents would respect my privacy and not come in. I guess your daughter is just experimenting and as long as it's not harmfull I would let her experience things. If you want to know what she's doing without interrupting her privacy but are worried that something might go wrong and you won't know it and won't be able to enter get something like a small cam or the cams that are hidden in teddies that will show an image on the tv. This way you can see what she's doing without her knowing and without interupting her. It's still an infringment of her privacy but it's for the best if you are worried she might get hurt.
• China
28 Jul 08
HI..When i read about what you said,i have think of me .I think maybe you should not be so worried.When i was a child i usually close my bedroom and lock it. But i amn't do something like you said =do something wrong,quite the other way i am reading books or sometime i am do my homework.So ,be rexesed,maybe your child is doing something they want to do ,but not bad things...may be they also need something that belongs to them.do you agree with me
2 people like this
27 Jul 08
I dont say that it would worry me ,but my thoguht would be that she was up to no good,and maybe that would cause me to fret a little bit,if theres nothing to hide then why lock the door?but them again if they are in their teens they need a little privacy,so it works all ways round.
@ersmommy1 (12607)
• United States
27 Jul 08
When my daughter was around 2 she accidentally locked herself in our bedroom. After that her father and uncle changed all the door knobs so it couldn't happen again. She is now 5. So there are no locks. She may shut her door and we may shut ours. Privacy is needed, as a teen and beyond. But now no one gets locked out.
2 people like this
@lilybug (21184)
• United States
27 Jul 08
My son does not have the ability to lock his door. There is no lock on the door. If he did have a lock on his door and he was locking it all the time during the day I would be convinced that he was up to no good.
2 people like this