Can One Be Happy Without Being In A Relationship?

Sleeping so sound - Just Dozing
@Stirtime (269)
United States
January 21, 2009 7:07am CST
I am beginning to think I will live the rest of my life alone. While that does not scare me, was wondering are there those who are just fine not being in a relationship or is the need for companionship too powerful?
15 people like this
60 responses
@ANTIQUELADY (36489)
• United States
22 Jan 09
i live alone & have for a long time. there are alot worse things than living alone, believe i have been there done that.it's nice to have someone to be with but not worth it if they are abusive toward you mentally & physically. no man [or woman] is worth that. happiness is a state of mind in my opinion it's up to you to be positive whereever u are are , with someone or by yourself. good luvk.
2 people like this
@dpk262006 (56115)
• Delhi, India
22 Jan 09
It'll largely depend upon your own determination level and your will power. If you feel that you have capacity and determination to 'enjoy' your life all alone and you can be without any companion, then no problem. Most of us go for companion, because we apprehend insecurity in our life and always wish to share our joys and sorrows with others. If you have a companion, then only you can realise the feeling of give and take. Best of Luck to you.
2 people like this
@jdyrj777 (6558)
• United States
24 Jan 09
Im single and loving it. I feel bad for people who think they need another person to be happy. They need to be happy with themselves first. Then look for a mate if they feel thats the route. But they should be happy with themselves first. How can they be happy with someone if they are not happy with themself?
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Yes true and who's to say when we find someone will anything change? No one will ever know what's in store for us in any new relationship, that's what taking chances is all about!
1 person likes this
@jdyrj777 (6558)
• United States
26 Jan 09
yes that is sp true. A relationship you thought would be the best could turn out the worse or visa versa.
• India
23 Jan 09
Hello my dear Stirtime Ji, I do not understand how people get an idea to live alone, when they were not born by them selve. It is un-natural feeling. I am not talking and thinking of any partner, I am talking about whole world. Where and how one could live without relation, evn if you want to live un-socially , you have to go to some jungles, where lot of plants/animals/insects would give you company and be related with you. Do not think taht you are alone here as well, if am responding your discussion, I have already esatblished a relationship with you. Just do not think of living alone. Life is enjoyable, a Gift by Amighty, let's enjoy. may god bless you and have a great time.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Hi Maygodblessu44, I don't want to be alone and I am not totally alone. I have my family around, I am just saying I am OK with being alone, without a relationship if that's what the Almighty has for me. It is His will for me, what will come, will come and I will except whatever He sends my way. Good Bless you too.
1 person likes this
• India
25 Jan 09
Hello my dfear Stirtime Ji, I thgink the word ' " Relationship" is very much mis-leading, when we talk and think about relationship, we straight away think about two persons of different gender sharing the relation. So I talked about a relationship immediately after our birth. No sooner, we were born, we were related with many realtion around some phgysical and very close , some giove status in form of society. So I am of tehnopinion, no one should think to live alone. Let's share our feelings and feel realted with each othewr. I am very ahppy taht you have your family. may god bless you and have a great time.
@rosdimy (3936)
• Malaysia
21 Jan 09
One of my school mates is still single, without any girlfriend, and he is happy about. My once removed cousin prefers to be happy by remaining single. Based on the two of them a person can be happy without being in a relationship. Both of them are hapy with what they already have, and prefer not to complicate their lives by being involved with someone of the opposite gender. Some people prefer to be loners. Some have accepted whatever has fallen on their lives, and have learnt to cope being alone. These people can laugh without the need to be in a deep relationship. To be at peace with oneself can bring forth happiness. all the best, rosdimy
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
23 Jan 09
I have friends that are alone and seem to be loners as well. I can actually say even when I was with someone there were times I wished I was alone, at least alone in the sense of "wish they would stop bothering me"! LOL
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3936)
• Malaysia
23 Jan 09
Behave like a crazy person and they may leave you alone. Examples include talking to yourself and wearing unwashed clothes (I would not recommend this).
1 person likes this
@donsky14 (5963)
• Philippines
21 Jan 09
Well there are some people who likes to be not in a relationship, because they say that, when your in a relationship someone would control what your doing. So, its like, their better off without a man because their free. Something like that. As for me, I prefer to be in a relationship...I don't really have a problem with my boyfriend..he lets me live my life and he supports everything that I do. So don't feel restricted.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
21 Jan 09
Restrictions aren't fun but often we put the restrictions on ourselves more than someone else putting restrictions on for us.
1 person likes this
@donsky14 (5963)
• Philippines
21 Jan 09
Yeah, but sometimes its our partner that puts restrictions. Things like, you can't go there alone, or something like that.
1 person likes this
@goldeneagle (6775)
• United States
24 Jan 09
I was pretty happy when I was single, and it seemed like I had a lot fewer problems to deal with...
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Yeah that is what many find out, when finally alone you have no one to answer to but yourself and your decisions are yours alone. Sometimes a very refreshing thing!
1 person likes this
• India
23 Jan 09
yes i think it is possible.. the need to have a companion is strong in some people and for them being single would not give any satisfaction.. so you got to figure out for yourself if you see yourself with a person and if you would ike to find real love.. if that aint important to you, then you go ahead and be single... sometimes being single is a ton times better than being in a relationship..
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Yes, so true, so far single is good!
@DEVONECO (144)
• United States
22 Jan 09
Being alone is not necessarily being lonely. You can be "alone" as not being in a relationship but still have friends, colleagues, family and even pets around you to make you not feel "lonely". Companionship can relate to either situation - are you looking for an intimate companionship with someone sharing love and romance? Or are you looking for friends around you to hang out with, meet and talk and engage in some sports or community activities or just have a great time? If you have not found someone to share an intimate relationship and still do not have friends around you, then you are denying yourself of the happiness that you deserve. I would suggest you talk to your inner self and figure out who you are looking for - and then find the right companionship for you. Now, that does not mean that some people are not happy being alone - but its up to you to be sure you want to play this game of solitaire!
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Solitaire can be an ok game as long as you get your cards in order!
@ronaldinu (12445)
• Malta
22 Jan 09
Definitely yes. I think one can live happily without being in a lifetime relationship. some are suited for marriage or a relationship while other prefer a single life. I don't find anything wrong in that. One can still live happily as a single person though it might have some hardships. © ronaldinu 2009 – the more people I meet – the more I love my dog.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
True some should not be in relationships, never mind get married, unfortunately there are many that are and even becoming parents only to all of a sudden realize they should have stayed singe, that in turn hurts the other partner and the children!
• United States
22 Jan 09
I think it is easier to be happy in a relationship when one is happy with themselves. I don't believe people can make anyone happy, that it comes from within. However, once you are happy with who you are, we tend to attract others who enhance our lives in one way or another.
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
yes exactly, being happy with oneself is important before we can be happy with another.
@savypat (20247)
• United States
22 Jan 09
I can't answer this, I have never been alone, I have two daughters, one doesn't mind being alone and the other can stand it. I think this must be something basic in your personality.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
I think personality has a lot to do with it just as past experience sets our mind frames for whether or not we stay that way.
@derek_a (10902)
22 Jan 09
I once lived alone for about 2 years in between relationships. Whilst I really enjoyed the experience, in the back of my mind, I still wanted to share my life with somebody. :-) Derek
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
I think that feeling is in the back of anyone's mind, it's what is embedded in most of us. A natural instinct, a need for coupling and cleaving to one who makes us feel good, special and wanted. (but feeling good, special and wanted is something we need to find within ourselves) When we don't have that any longer we begin to miss it and unless something is holding us back like a severe relationship or that dreadful hurt of the ex partner, we begin to look again.
@Erssyl (617)
• Philippines
22 Jan 09
In my opinion I can't be happy alone the rest of my life.The only relationship that I want to keep is with my family.My husband and my children and my grandchildren.I can't imagine myself seeking the companionship of another man.How can one be happy alone?
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
When someone is use to being in relationship, especially one that is very long, it may be hard to see being alone as a good thing, may even feel a bit fearful of being alone and even think that if it ends, well that's it! I really think it depends on the situation that lead to being alone. I think everyone, deep down, wants some kind of companionship whether it be romantic, platonic or familiar, no one wants to spend their days talking to themselves!
• United States
22 Jan 09
I think you can be happy without a relationship. Well I think I could be. If I could turn back time I would live my life single again and not get married. Marriage is to expensive for just a piece of paper.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Yes you can, but Marriage, just like any other relationship, is what you make of it~
@Raven1 (577)
• Australia
22 Jan 09
I think it's important to learn that you create your own happiness. Your partner does not create your happiness for you. In fact, if you live your life following those things you enjoy doing and learn to appreciate your own 'alone time', you'll find that your partner will appreciate you more because of your independence.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Hi Raven1, yes you are right we make our own happiness and being independent is a great happiness, just I am still learning!...LOL
@dloveli (4369)
• United States
22 Jan 09
Hel* yeah!!!! My ex and I were together for 14 years. I thought if it ever ended I would be devastated. As the time went by I wished he wouldnt come home at night. Finally when we did part. I loved being able to have my own space. Cook smaller meals. I didnt have to cook I could have cereal or a sandwich. My daughters were sad at first but when they saw how much happier and relaxed I was they were happy too. When my girls would sleep over my sisters, I would have the house all to myself. I loved the quiet. Me being with me. I lived happily alone for 4 years. One day I met someone when I wasnt looking. He was a good guy we have been together ever since. Trust me it will come when you least expect it. If you have children, enjoy them while you have this time alone. You'll regret it if you dont. Good Luck and take lots of bubble baths. I found my creative side. Now I make and sell costume jewelry as a side job. I loved being by myself. You will too. dl
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
25 Jan 09
I know what you mean, alone time is great, most of my relationship was when the children were younger, now they are adults 2 have families of their own and the youngest still lives with me. There are times I wish he would go to a friends because I rarely get time to spend on the computer never mind a bubble bath! Well a lot of that is my own fault, I still like to do for others, even my family and friends. Help how can I stop.... LOL
• United States
22 Jan 09
The Irony is that you cannot be happy in a relationship unless you can be happy without one. Otherwise, it is a co-dependency, Right?
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
23 Jan 09
So true, like, love one self before you can be loved or loved by another, I am still learning that one. Learning to be independent as well is something everyone needs to learn! Two parts of an independent heart will in turn make one whole.
1 person likes this
@roberten (3131)
• United States
21 Jan 09
There are lots of people who are prefectly comfortable being alone and I am one of them. Relationships have not been my forte so I find it much enjoyable to stay by myself. This choice is a very personal one and is not a lifestyle that everyone would enjoy. Thank goodness there is no negative stigma associated with choosing to live alone.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
23 Jan 09
LoL, I guess I can say mine aren't either but either way I know I will be fine! Like I said in a prior reply, there are times I would love being alone and it's a choice that only I have to decide to make, so it is cool to make my own bed and lay in it!
1 person likes this
@diillu (5128)
21 Jan 09
Relationship isn't a life but of course it's one of the important part of a life but people have their own views and feelings regarding it. But of course there are only few people who choses to be without them and have lived their whole life alone. Well, sometimes we really get hit when relationship comes to an end since we had planned and thought many thing about it but it doesn't mean that the whole idea was bad. Meeting a wrong people doesn't make the "relationship" itself bad. It's all about learning from bad mistake and while going through the ups and downs of our life we need someone really close to share our sorrows as well as joys.
1 person likes this
@Stirtime (269)
• United States
23 Jan 09
Life is what we make of it. If we are meant to share our lives then we will be with someone! If it ends up to be a bad turn, then we will have learned from the course in which we had chosen. If we are blessed by being with someone for always than that is what was picked for us, just as if we are alone at that time, it is the chosen path we are walking on. Along the path we may see lots of colorful flowers or a few scampering animals but we will know where we are heading by the trail we leave behind.
1 person likes this