Does "changing yourself" for somebody ever work?  |
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 I'm not talking about changing a few bad habits or learning to communicate better or being nicer, superficial behavioral changes. I'm talking about changing the way you really are deep down inside. There's something fundamental to each one of us as a person, and I don't believe that you can change what that is. I'd go farther and say that if you try to and if you live and act as if you are something you are not to please somebody else, you are going to end up being unhappy, stressed and it will affect your health and well being. Does anybody really believe that you can change what makes you you?
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1.  missliss08 (170) | 3 months ago |  I think we all have little habits we can change, to make each other happier. However if someone is willing to ask you to completely change everything about you, for them, then it won't work. First of all I think it is disrespectful, and they will just think of you as a pushover. Just my opinion though.
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 dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | Not only is it disrespectful, it's impossible. You can't change everything that you are. | |
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| TheChocolateTear (20) | 3 months ago |  i thnk dat we shud change our habits a lil bt we shud nt be who v are nt nd can nver be. . .smetimes ppl like u da way u are bt we jst dnt get it sooo doo change ur habits bt nt ur own nature,personality.remember who u are.chaoi!do ur stuff
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2.  doormouse (1153) | 3 months ago |  i think people can change,but you have to do it for yourself,changing for someone else never works
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | You can change many things, your behavior, your values, how you communicate. But I don't think you can change what makes you you. | |
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | PS and you're right, you have to want to. | |
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3.  nextellady (118) | 3 months ago | I dont think it will work, really your not changing just pretending. And you cant pretend for ever and your right, you have to consider stress and health issues it could cause | |
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | Exactly, you're pretending. | |
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | I think so too. Or get awfully depressed... | |
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| TheChocolateTear (20) | 3 months ago | lady~!u r sooooo rite being sm1 u r nt works very very very less nd u r jst PRETENDNG!ND ALSO V CNT B WHT V R NT OUR WHOLE LIVES.IT CAUSES SUCH A STRESS ND FRUSTRATION.SO B WHT U R | |
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| vandana7 (1802) | 3 months ago |  mysdianait said it perfectly. Can't add to that.:)
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| 4. dumblnddzzy (10307) | 3 months ago |  NO I do not believe one can 'change' the real 'you'... You are 'you ' from birth on into adulthood & beyond that even... You are 'mapped' if you will, to who & what you are.. Yes i belive that if you try & CHANGE who you really are, you will be a very unhappy person, inside & out. Lori
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| 5. cobrateacher (4271) | 3 months ago |  Hi, D!
I couldn't agree more. Trying to change someone is a sign of rejecting whoever that person is! It can also be an inroad to psychological abuse. It just won't work!
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | Yep, the person has to want to change. And even then, there are just some things that make each of us unique that I believe aren't changeable. | |
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| 6. max1950 (1429) | 3 months ago |  if you mean changing yourself to be a better person inside that has to be done by and for the individual them self and THEY and only they have to want it. Changing for someone else i dont think would work unless the person deep down inside wants to. did i explain that right? well i know what i mean anyway.
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | Not so much changing to be a better person. That's just a matter of following through on what you know to be right. I mean changing what makes you you. Like if you're really extroverted and love talking to people and you're with somebody who wants you to be more shy. That's asking you to be something that you are not. | |
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | I think you can change how you behave and how you react to things, events can cause that or you can just decide to do it, but what really makes you you, nope. | |
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| 8. Lcrkar05 (151) | 3 months ago | I think you have to want to change for yourself. Sometimes is for the better and sometimes people do it for the wrong reasons. | |
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | You do have to want to, but I think there are some things about ourselves that we just can't change. | |
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| 9. just4you0 (286) | 3 months ago |  i think its really difficult to change yourself as i have tried it practically but i cant tell how i failed to do that . its good idea to remain whatever you are because everyone is unique in this world.
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | Unless who you are is something really bad. But seriously, you can change bad behaviors if you want to, but some facets of a person can't be changed. | |
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| 10. caroll30 (1103) | 3 months ago |  No you cannot change you. Plain and simple we are who we are. We may be able to think a different way but if you truly believe something thats just the way it is nobody can change it. And dawnald I sure hope you keep on being you!!
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| dawnald (10346) | 3 months ago | I shall continue to stay myself.:-)
I was actually writing this about a friend. | |
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