things you should never say...
By jb78000
@jb78000 (15139)
November 21, 2009 6:38pm CST
...if you are a cyberbully. recently got the classic 'never respond to me again'. you are a ............ [later deleted] which i immediately responsed to with an erm response [later left]. so how do you respond to those that try to bully either online or in real life - ignore, laugh, or get furious? i tend to laugh at those that try to bully me but get very angry when i see it directed at anybody else.
7 people like this
16 responses
@ZephyrSun (7381)
• United States
22 Nov 09
Were you in politics? That's really the only time I've ever seen the "never respond to me again."
I get upset that people bully others and when someone tries to bully me I just get right back in their face. I don't take crap from anyone 
2 people like this
@jb78000 (15139)
•
22 Nov 09
how on earth did you guess where i was zeph? i don't appreciate bullying either - and when somebody calls me names and then tells me not to reply to them i am naturally going to go and add comments wherever i see them. actually i am a little concerned that this might have been the aim of this one - this users discussions receive few responses so perhaps was trying to drum up interest via reverse psychology...
hmmmm.
@celticeagle (189838)
• Boise, Idaho
23 Nov 09
It depends on what they are saying and what the situation is. I may ignore it , laugh and send a silly reply if I feel the situation warrants one. And if it is obviously injustice or unwarranted to begin with then I may get furious. If it is directed at someone else and if those others are my kids I may get very furious.
@celticeagle (189838)
• Boise, Idaho
25 Nov 09
I hope that chose works well for you. Family is family any way you look at it.
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
23 Nov 09
Hi celti ceagle: I would take all these options except for the last one because i prefer not to discuss directly. I'm not the fighting kind as i mention in some other post, i prefer to call the authorities if you know what i mean: the teacher or the boss or try to make this person go away from me. Thanks for your answer, i think you have mentioned a good way to act in those cases.
2 people like this
@jb78000 (15139)
•
25 Nov 09
hi celtic, oops, missed this before. i'm not ignoring you on purpose... i don't really get angry when i get it on or offline but like you when it is directed at others i do, especially if i feel it will make them upset. i remain polite when i get angry (always in virtual situations) but i hope nobody is going to think there is any hint of fluffiness left...
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
22 Nov 09
Same for me. Somehow or rather, I find some bullies getting super irritated when we just laugh off at their faces. Like not letting things they say affecting us, so to speak. It is for the best; that way, and so...yeah. I do get angry too when I see someone else being bullied. But if it were me, I'll just laugh it off. And indirectly saying get a life..
1 person likes this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
22 Nov 09
Hi jb, I saw the latest one where you were told to never respond again, it actually sounded worse in the bold italics actually used I thougt. You were also called a liar and an idiot don't forget, when all you'd done was state a difference of opinion in an area of your particular interest, in which you actually talk a lot of sense. Of course you did speak for yourself instead of quoting so called experts and should realise by now that some others only like to discuss by sticking in dubious sources.
Difficult one to address I found but you dealt with it well, and I reported it on your behalf but was a bit of a wimp going in as as you know I've also been hit a few times this week by much more abusive insults from the same poster who also negative rates at the same time, a habit no doubt picked up from posting in politics most usually, so should we say entering politics to insult everyone who dares to have their own opinion. I did respond to the second post again accusing you of being a liar and fortunately it was ignored.
You know me though, when she did it to me I was furious but no point addressing such ignorance but very nice to see others who note it going in and pointing out how totally ludicrous it is. Frankly though I am amazed that such a person is still allowed to post here as the daily insults to anyone who does not agree are cyber bullying on a massive extent.
1 person likes this
@Sandra1952 (6047)
• Spain
22 Nov 09
I don't like to see my friends bullied either, especially the fluffy blue bunnies and the Greek Girls on here. I tend to be rude without appearing to be rude, by throwing in a few long winded responses. The problem most of these people have is that they have a terminal case of stupid, which means their vocabulary is limited, hence the excessive use of expletives and insults. When they're faced with reasoned arguments and long words, they can't deal with it.
1 person likes this
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
24 Nov 09
Hi Sandra, I just seen this, how sweet of you thanks. You know how I hate confrontations. The big bullies discussions have been removed and now she's posting remarks everywhere that we reported them and admin deleted them because we told them to but they never read them. I didn't report them as I thought they showed her for what she was. 
@Lucky09 (1763)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
hi jb^^;;
that is real crap! why in the world they have to say like that....
hmmm maybe if it was directed to me then i will respond more and more but won't take it seriously. if i show that i am affected then it's a win for them so i would just pretend to enjoy what they are doing to get them annoyed too
hmmm maybe if it was directed to me then i will respond more and more but won't take it seriously. if i show that i am affected then it's a win for them so i would just pretend to enjoy what they are doing to get them annoyed too1 person likes this
@jb78000 (15139)
•
22 Nov 09
hiya - oh i think it was because my response (which of course was perfectly polite) was disagreeing with this user who only wanted people to agree. now i have no intention of letting would be mini-tyrants tell me what to do like that so, after having a good laugh, i spent a happy few minutes adding very pleasant responses to some of their other discussions (meeting nastiness with nastiness is not something i do, this is far more fun).
@Lucky09 (1763)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
it's not a discussion then when everybody wants others to agree on their posts.
maybe your response challenged his/her intelligence and had hurt his/her ego
ofcourse i would be polite too as i don't want starting a "war" here. but he/she is just so rude to say that.
ofcourse i would be polite too as i don't want starting a "war" here. but he/she is just so rude to say that.1 person likes this
@pergammano (7682)
• Canada
22 Nov 09
G'day! Cyber bully~~because they can! Real-life bully~~because you let them! Attention seeking gestures, in my life, when ignored seems to go away! If the arrow doesn't hit the target, there is NO score! I ignore...no score! Seems to take the wind out of their sails! In my life, I've also encountered persons, that are truly not aware that bullying is their demeanor, and do not mean to come across that way! Others~~self defense. Cheers!
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30953)
• United States
22 Nov 09
Hi little bunny,
I don't usually get so angry when it is directed at me. It all depends on my mood and how nasty the response on whether I try to reason with the person because sometimes it is a simple misunderstanding or get mildly irritated. When they are picking on someone else & I can clearly see that it isn't in fun, I get furious too.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
22 Nov 09
Hi blue bunny I can laugh at them but if they start in on mylot friends I tend to get mad and lash out maybe its not right but Ihate bullies picking on my best mylot friends here.sometimes I end up with my comments being deleted but I was joined by a number of others. also a mylotter got very vicious towards me when I made a discussion on homeless people and my mylot friends really did get on her case. Her remarks were later deleted as they were really vicious.
@dawnald (85137)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Nov 09
I get mad and come out with a toned down version of what I think usually. If I get really mad, I don't bother saying anything. I either avoid or if it's bad, I report it...
@dawnald (85137)
• Shingle Springs, California
23 Nov 09
I seem to have a real fear of anger and confrontation which I am attempting to learn to overcome...
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
22 Nov 09
Hi there jb! Since bullies want to intimidate and push others around (in failed attempts to cover up STUPID) I've always found that laughing and ridiculing them REALLY ticks 'em off, making the encounters lots of fun...at least for me.
I had to laugh at the "never respond to me again" thing. I'm sure he seriously believed that he'd put you in your place and that you would promptly obey his orders.
@cloudwatcher (6861)
• Australia
22 Nov 09
Thea I'd be happy to add my tuppence if you let me know where . . .
@thea09 (18305)
• Greece
22 Nov 09
It's the weekend so the second accusation of the rabbit being a liar is still sat there. Please feel free to go in and ridicule the poster who seems to get her kicks this way. Makes me wonder though how many deleted insulting posts it takes for someone to get thrown out of here. 
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
22 Nov 09
In real life, I give them a mouthful, and if it escalates, a punch in the face to those who are my size or thereabouts, and a knee to the crown jewels with the really big ones. That's because my emphesema makes it impossible to run away. But generally speaking, just standing up to them seems to do the trick. I've been told that in these situations I seem to swell up to twice my normal size and look quite intimidating, and it's been very rare that anything more has been needed. Not bad for a midget.
In areas like MyLot, I ignore them. Actually, I have trouble understanding the concept of on-line bullying - if there's no physical threat, it's only words, and why people carry on about being traumatised by on-line attacks leaves me scratching my head. Perhaps I simply can't remember the unsureness of extreme youth, it being 50 years in my past.
I can, however, get a bit annoyed when I see it happening to others, and tend to sharpen my rapier tongue (well, fingers in this case) and get involved. Paternalistic idiot I am lol.
Lash
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
23 Nov 09
I only had one person tell me that they never wanted me to respond to them again. I did not think that I had said or done anything offensive, but apparently they took what I said as such. I felt badly that they thought that I was a mean-hearted person that just wanted to start trouble, but I did not pursue the conversation any further. To date, I have not responded to anything that this person has posted. However, this person threatened to report me if I ever responded to anything that they posted, which I thought was uncalled for and could have been reported as a threat. I felt that it was better to just walk away, but if I see a discussion by this person that interests me, then I might decide to respond in the future.
@jb78000 (15139)
•
23 Nov 09
misunderstanding there i think purple - however threatening people not to dare respond to them i'm afraid has the effect at least on me of ensuring i will go and add some more (polite and relevant i hasten to add) responses to a few of their discussions. of course this might be the aim of these kind of comments - it often makes sure people go and do the opposite of what you tell them.
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
23 Nov 09
The worst part is that this person was trying to help one of my friends out, and I thought this person was coming from a good place with the comments they were making, but the comments seemed very harsh and rather mean. I was not the only one to think this, and other people pointed it out as well. I tried to smooth over the situation by rephrasing what was being said, and this person responded back with a nice reply and seemed to understand and agree with what I was saying. I thought that everybody was on the same page, and the original poster even thanked me for clearing up the situation, because she had also taken this person's comments as being harsh and mean. I told her that I was happy to help, because I was sure that the person did not intend to sound the way they originally did, and I was glad that all the misunderstandings were cleared up. A happy ending to the story, right? Wrong.
The person that had responded commented back attacking me and saying that the only misunderstandings were the ones that I and another user had created, and this person accused me of being the one that was doing the attacking and creating problems. Then, this person warned me never to reply to anything they said again. This person said that they did not report me yet, but if I ever responded to anything they wrote, then they would report me for harassment. After that, I stumbled onto a discussion that I almost responded to before I realized that the poster of the discussion was this person. It was a discussion about ... wait for it ... rude people bullying others!
After reading the discussion, I realized that this person was talking about me! At least in my case, though, the person was nice enough never to mention my name - unlike the person that started a discussion about their version of the events in question that prompted you to start this discussion and several times mentioned not only your name but also another of our mutual friends.
By the way, has that discussion been deleted yet?
After reading the discussion, I realized that this person was talking about me! At least in my case, though, the person was nice enough never to mention my name - unlike the person that started a discussion about their version of the events in question that prompted you to start this discussion and several times mentioned not only your name but also another of our mutual friends. By the way, has that discussion been deleted yet? @starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
23 Nov 09
Hi jb78000: It's horrible to find these persons. In general i try to ignore them because it's difficult to me to laugh when i find someone that try to hurt me it's just why does he/ she does this to me? It's unfair. Some years ago it was even worst because this hurt my self-esteem because i think i don't deserve to receive this treatment. I was very innocent so it was very easy to make fun of me when i was a little boy and some boys make it. So basically i try to ignore it. Thanks for making this question. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@RawBill1 (8531)
• Gold Coast, Australia
22 Nov 09
I prefer to laugh at people like that too, they take themselves too seriously these people who get angry and bully others. They need to have a look at themselves and lighten up a bit. They think that they are winning by acting this way, but they are only hurting themselves in the long run by bullying others. 
